Bitterroot Valley feels like we only go backwards

It kept getting stronger, and then he heard shuffling, and his chest tightened. No, no, no— "Alarian."
He turned, looked up into a familiar fiery gaze, and the breath left him. No, The word slipped from him without thought, trembling but forceful. No— you're not real. Alarian took a few steps back, hackles lifting; Zamael was gone. This was fake— a malfunction of his brain, the fundamental flaw written into his existence.

Heat stung his eyes, then spilled over. He lowered himself to the ground with flattened ears, the ghost of a snarl tugging at his features. Why— why can't you leave me alone? His voice broke, ending in a choked sob. He just wanted to know why. This— this thing in front of him would have no answers, he knew, but he had no other to ask.