Broken Boulder i dont even feel like writing

before he could even register the fact that somehow alarian's brother was mixed up in all of this--he had a brother?--alarian went on, an angry tirade of words thrown at him. he was completely perplexed until the governor made it clear. he had told dawn about alarian, and dawn had let it slip. it was alarian's verdict on his supposed goodness that had his eyes grow cold, icy balls of gold in his skull.

"you're wrong. i am good. just--" he cut off, shaking his head in disbelief. "look, i'm sorry i told dawn about you, about us. it was thrown out in anger, and maybe i shouldn't have. but it wasn't fair that i, alone, had to live with the image of my mate fucking someone else. for once, i wanted to feel. . ."

aditya sucked in a breath, glancing away. "even. i wanted to feel even. like i wasn't the only one hurting." he couldn't even bear to look at alarian now, knowing even as he said them that his words were completely hypocritical. "you never should have been caught in the middle. for that, i am sorry."

and then there was irritation once again, prickling at every inch of his skin, raising each individual hair on his pelt, good nature be damned. "but you don't get to make blanket judgments on my character," adi snapped, looking back at alarian with eyes that had melted into fire once more. "dawn and i, we both fucked up. i am good; i simply got screwed over one too many times in life. you don't know me at all. you don't know my life, my thoughts, and you've merely scratched the surface of my feelings. all you know is my body--the shell of me, the part that matters least!

"i do care about you, just like i care about dawn, my pack, my friends. but people who care about each other hurt each other, sometimes. that's how life goes. you can't escape it, no matter how hard you try." he swallowed, and then the ice was back, his withering gaze fixed firmly on the governor. "but i'm glad you and dawn 'worked it out,'" he added, a nasty mockery of alarian's words.