Hushed Willows the dragonfly it ran away.
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Each time she left the Crook, Harlyn had felt as though it were an epic battle of mind over matter. For weeks she had been tucked away into its depths, watching in a feverish haze as the world spun madly on around her. It had been torment to lie useless while Pippin was missing, and so too now when Larkspur and Mordecai were gone as well. Perhaps it was for these facts that the druid had pulled her through when for days, she had been convinced that her time had come. Her family had been through far too much to lose her as well, after all. They needed her. Silas needed her.

Though the fever had broken and Harlyn felt stronger than she had in days, it was on shaking legs that she emerged from the Crook into the daylight. The druid blinked at the ground through squinted eyes, unused to the sunlight that dappled the grass beneath her paws. By the time she made it to a nearby stream where she leaned to slake her thirst, she had adjusted and was able to gaze out across the territory.

Harlyn slipped to her haunches once she was satisfied and allowed her thoughts to roam. It would still take time for her to return to the physical strength she had held before the incident with the wolverine, and perhaps that would always been just beyond her reach. Her paw had mended, but still it felt heavy and stiff, as though her bones had been replaced with lead. As she pondered though, she wondered what it truly mattered to her that she was not yet at her best. Would she really allow that to stop her from leaving forthwith to find her lost family? Could she afford to leave? What of Silas, should she bring him? Would her place as a member of the Marauders be forfeit if she did take the last member of her family with her on this venture?

A wind shifted across her fur that she would have recognized as the faintest of signs of the weather turning towards Fall, but the druid barely noticed as she fell into the depths of her thoughts.
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Still Stark was disappointed in both Trick and Grace that neither had seen fit to attend to Harlyn as she shrugged with her healing. They were gone now though and he would never bother to worry about them, never wonder how they fared. They had made their choices. Stark still tried to make sure that things were okay, that Harlyn had food and that he was doing things she might agree with. He was unsure in a lot of ways but felt better after claiming the pack officially than when he was leaving things to the chance that Octavia might come home and that she might be herself again. 

When Stark found Harlyn outside of the Crook he made his way towards the woman, gently reaching out to nudge her shoulder. "Feeling better?" He asked just a touch hopefully - he didn't expect her to leave the Crook if she wasn't feeling up for it but it would probably still be very taxing to her to be out and about. 
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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*makes all the assumptions* I can edit if need be! Just let me know. I have not been keeping up all too great :x

Harlyn had not opposed to Stark's ascension to alpha. Of all the wolves within the Keep, he struck her as the most suited for the task after herself. He had been put in a hard position after the incident with Tavi and had performed as admirably in any. In all that had occurred, it was towards him that she felt the most guilt. It was an emotion that paled in comparison to what she felt regarding her own family's current state, but still it was there.

She heard him before she caught his scent, but still she knew it was Stark that approached. She turned her head slightly in his direction and reached to return the touch with a soft smile. "Yes, I believe the worst has finally passed," Harlyn replied, then added after a beat with a touch of dark humor, "At least, when it comes to my physical health."

Harlyn turned her gaze fully to him then. "No sign of Octavia?" she asked. She was truly curious, but not in that she was eager to see the woman return. From what she understood, the alpha was showing clear signs of a degrading mental state, and it was not just her own experience that suggested it. Harlyn was loathe to see her return to her former place in the pack, and it was not likely that she would keep her opinion silent should the woman show herself again. Still, she was aware of Stark's feelings towards the wayward alpha, and so she would remain as kind and diplomatic as she could, if only for the sake of his heart.
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It was an immediate relief to know that she was feeling better, that she felt herself growing stronger rather than weaker. Stark's tail gave a slow gentle sway as she made contact with him too, it was a subtle little thing but he felt supported by Harlyn and it was still a comfort to him. He had gotten her opinion, trying not to be a bother but he still wanted her support. She had come to the Keep for a home for her family and slowly it had all crumbled. If whatever had taken hold of Octavia had not - things would have been so much better. The children, Mordecai, all of them would be at home. 

"I'm glad you're on the mend," Stark said gently. "It's good to see you out and about again." He offered. He knew what she was hinting - he couldn't do a thing about that, he couldn't offer her much anything else. The pack knew his trips out, how he continued to look for the wolves who had gone missing, but he didn't know what else could be done in the meantime. 

She asked after Octavia and he grit his teeth just a bit, a clench of his jaw that might have been subtle enough to not be seen. His overly expressive eyes however would probably betray his mixed feelings - he missed her, certainly he did, but he missed who she was and still longed for what might have been. The other side he was disgusted by what he had seen and heard from everyone of Octavia's behavior. "Nothing. I ran into a friend of hers - she was just as surprised by Octavia running off." He said - thinking bitterly back to the fight that had sent Octavia over the edge and running off. 

Still, no doubt, the pack had heard them but no one said a thing to him about it. 
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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Harlyn felt relief at hearing that there was still no sign of Tavi. There had been a time when she may have been distressed for the woman's absence, but not anymore. Not after she had proven herself to Harlyn to be dangerously impetuous. It was one thing to act violently to protect your children against a stranger when the situation was uncertain, but your own pack? Your fellow alpha?

The druid pushed it from her mind. She had spent too much time already considering what had happened between them and reflecting on her feelings towards her former leadership partner. It was a useless exercise, particular now that Octavia was gone and there seemed to be no indication that she would return. Harlyn assumed the woman had died for what else would be keeping her from returning home to her son? And so it was pointless to debate the idiosyncracies of her personality that Harlyn believed made her unfit to lead and how she would conduct herself if the day ever came that Tavi returned to claim her pack, or at least her son. Neither would she allow to happen, and she hoped fervently that Stark was of a like mind even if she was not willing to broach the subject with him.

"May the Gods keep her well, wherever she has gone," Harlyn murmured quietly, more so in prayer than actual response to Stark. She was silent for a moment longer before looking again at her companion. 

"The past weeks have been a haze for me," she said to him, studying his face in earnest, "But I do not believe I have thanked you properly for all that you have done for my family while I have been incapacitated. It means a great deal." Harlyn spoke mostly of Silas, and too of the care he had shown to her. She was certain he had offered his kindness to Mordecai and Larkspur as well while they were still there in the Keep, and so too now did he do so in his search for them, as well as for Pippin.
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Stark had spent his time obsessing over what was going on in Octavia's mind. The fact was he couldn't figure out any sort of direction from the woman, she had been as gone and scattered as her thoughts. Octavia was a boat without a rudder just running the course and eventually she would crash. Perhaps she already had. Stark had considered what might happen if Octavia came back with the intention of taking Tambourine away - and he didn't want that. He couldn't let it happen. He wouldn't drive the two apart and she would be begged to stay. At least in the Keep she would be safe there. She'd be secure. He wouldn't give her the chance to hurt them further, though. 

Stark nodded at Harlyn's gentle words, the soft prayer was something he could understand and support even if he had never been religious. It was a kind offer, and it promised that the soul of the former Alpha was as good as Stark had always believed. Stark was thrown off for a moment by the druid's thanks - her gratitude surprised him, not because he felt it unlikely for her vocalization but because he honestly found himself just doing what was right. She didn't need to thank him for that. 

"We take care of our own."  Stark said gently, offering a thin lipped smile - they were Marauders and they had to stick together. "I just wish I had better news for you."  
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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Stark took her words humbly, as Harlyn had known that he would. She returned his smile with a soft one of her own, but it faltered as he lamented their lack of good tidings. The druid took a slow, deep breath to steady the rise of her emotions. What she wouldn't give to see Larkspur's eagerly smiling face, or Pippin's molten whiskey eyes. She missed Mordecai as well, but it was different to be without her children than it was to be without him. In a way, she was comforted by the fact that he was not there as she willed herself to believe that he still was with Larkspur, watching over her, caring for her. Perhaps he had found Pippin as well, and the three were together. It was a wonderful thought, even if it was hard for her to be so optimistic as to believe it.

"I will admit that I am not sure where to go from here," Harlyn said quietly, in an almost confessional tone, "I want to find them. If I could, I would go to the ends of the earth to find them. Even if it meant wearing my limbs down to stubs and falling dead from exhaustion, I would do it to bring them safely back home to me." Harlyn paused, considering her words. Her heart pulled so desperately towards the idea. She wanted her kids back. She wanted her husband back.

"But Silas is here. I cannot leave him alone, with none left of his family," she continued, "I cannot tear him from a place he has grown comfortable, not again. My skills at tracking have never been great, and Winter approaches. I need to be here, preparing, helping the pack as they have helped me, and making this a good home for my son. But at the same time.. it feels like I am abandoning his father, his brother and sister. My kids, my mate..."

Harlyn breathed heavily and allowd her gaze to drift across the water's surface. "I must stay, and I must go. So what then do I do?"
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Stark's heart felt for the woman. It was insane to imagine that he couldn't feel everything for her - worried over her mate, her children, everything. They were her world, her whole life, and she was without them. Only Silas remained and he knew the two Ostregas had to feel....empty. He did without Octavia there - but like Harlyn, he could not abandon his duties to the pack and to the child remaining there. "He's incredible." Stark began, murmuring the words gently. "To think a kid that young is that strong..." But that was the root of strength. It wasn't about being constantly amazing - to have a limitless ability. It was feeling you had nothing and yet finding the will to carry on. For that, Stark had a great respect for Silas.

"And you are strong too. What you can do here, to help settle things, help us prepare - Banner and I alternate who is outside the packs scouting and where we head off. I know that Rhodes has gone out too, and I've expressed the concern to the newer recruits as well." Stark explained. In a sense everything was being done that he could other than gleaming the location of the missing Ostregas from some magic ball but he didn't have that skill. 

Stark sighed softly, looking out past the willows - far away, as if he could find them. "I've checked by the Hollow, but I keep thinking...from what Mordecai said maybe he'd head there."
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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Harlyn was quiet as Stark formulated his response. She didn't know what to expect from him, except for shared remorse and boughts of sympathy which were appreciated, but otherwise did her no real good. When he did speak, the druid was touched by his words. She smiled, surprised that he was able to illicit such a response. Pride swelled in her chest for her son, for his words were true - Silas was doing remarkably well considering all that his life had dealt him thus far.

The druid listened as Stark continued, noting with silent appreciation all that he and the pack had done for her family while she had been unable to do a thing. He mentioned wolves she knew only faintly, and newer recruits which she struggled to even picture. But eventually, he mentioned Mordecai and the Hollow, and her ears perked as fear sank into her belly.

"But why would he go there?" Harlyn pondered aloud, stifling the panic that rose at the idea of him going back to those lands where they had been stalked and hunted by the demon cat, "There's.. there's nothing there for us, all of my family knew this when we left."  But did they? Her kids had been so young, and they must still harbor feelings of home and safety towards the woods where they had been born... But it would be too dangerous for any of them to return. Pippin knew this, didn't he? Fear gripped her tightly, but she held her tongue.
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Harlyn confirmed what Stark knew and what no doubt Mordecai knew but children were rarely so logical. Some adults weren't either - fully falling back to whimsy as if they were still children. It made sense, of course, and Stark could only offer a small but sad smile to the woman. "Maybe he's got some hope things are better now?" Stark offered quietly. "Or maybe he found someone to take him in for a bit. That was his hope anyways. Maybe someone would have done the honorable thing and taken the puppy in and protected him. 

"It's different for everyone, I wouldn't return to where I was born for anything. Maybe Pippin has some memory there he's latched onto." Stark tried to offer something more gentle to her, although he wasn't sure it would do anything. Harlyn knew those lands in ways that Stark never would after all. "Mordecai only told me a little about the Hollow and why you guys left." It didn't sound like there had been any choice at all for them.
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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Harlyn did her best to stifle the panic that threatened to take her. Somehow, she had never considered that perhaps Pippin had decided to return to the Hollow. As much as she had loved their former home, she knew in her heart that it was gone to her family forever. It would never be safe, not with the cougar lurking there still. She had no reason to suspect that her former best friend had killed the beast, and thus she saw only terrible danger in Pippin's future if he had indeed found his way back to that place.

Stark's voice kept her in the moment, and she turned to hold onto his steadying presence by holding him in her gaze. What he said made sense, as little as she wanted to accept that it may be the reality. He spoke then of what Mordecai had told him about why they had left, and Harlyn felt the guilt rise in her throat again. She had never told them about the cougar for fear that it would jeopardize their place in the Keep. She doubted that Tavi would have taken them in had she known the demon cat may have been haunting their steps.

But months had passed without a sign of the beast, and Harlyn had little reason to think that her family's place might somehow change because of the truth now. Still, she felt guilt burning in her as she resolved to tell him now. "There was a cougar that resided near the Hollow. Did he tell you?" Harlyn said slowly, quietly, doubting that Mordecai would have shared this information already, "It preyed upon us. It attacked Mordecai first, then my beta. Soon after it took Little Voice and then Shikoba when she tried to protect him. My beta was changed, and he left us, I assume in pursuit of vengeance but... it could have been for other reasons."

Harlyn paused to turn her gaze away, the memories causing heat to rise to her cheeks. "My pack dwindled until we had no choice but to leave. There weren't enough of us to hold the Hollow, and I could not stand continuing to raise my children in the demon's shadow," the druid took a breath before shutting her eyes, worry consuming her again, "Pippin could not have returned. He just. He can't have gone back to that place." It had seemed like home once, more so than any place ever had. But now it was a nightmare in her memory. Pippin couldn't be there.
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Seeing how upset Harlyn was getting had the Alpha's ears flickering back for a moment. It was almost like he had upset his own mother - that 'I'm not mad at you I'm just disappointed' even though Stark could rationally know that it wasn't him that Harlyn was upset with. He was quiet as Harlyn laid out everything she had experienced and Stark understood then the fear that had risen in her. When they had been near the Hollow Stark hadn't caught any trails of any big cats or any large game, but then, his focus had been more on the missing puppy more than anything. 

"Did the children know?" He asked softly, clearly taking the situation as serious as it was. For Stark, he had done a great amount of growing and a large part of it was for the sake of the Keep. It meant everyone - even those wolves who were still missing. "I've checked there, I think Mordecai did too. I didn't find anything - nothing more than sparse game." He explained, hoping it might ease some of her fears. 

Of course it wasn't so easy considering that Harlyn was worried over her son and figuring out where the child might have gone. For Stark, he couldn't even imagine how he'd feel if Tambourine went missing - and maybe he was lucky that the boy hadn't taken off into the wild to find Octavia. 
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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You wanna wrap up and maybe has new soon? :D

Harlyn had no doubt that her children had been aware of the danger the pack had been in. She'd done her best to shelter them from the worst of the horrors the cat had wrought upon them, but there had been no hiding when one by one, their packmates came crawling back into the safety of the Hollow, torn to shreds by the beast's claws. So, she gave a nod to Stark's query and set her jaw to listen as he continued.

His words brought her some comfort. She didn't know what the cat would do after she and her pack had left the Hollow. The druid had feared that it would follow them, but she'd been pleased when there had been no sign of it haunting their footsteps. She assumed that it lurked near the Hollow still, but if Stark had found no signs of it when he'd gone there...

"I feared the cat would have followed us when we left," she admitted, "But I have never seen any signs of it since. I am glad to know that you discovered nothing when you were there as well, but I still worry for my son if that is where he went. It is a haunted place now." Harlyn shook her head lightly, a bit too hard for she swooned a moment later. She shifted a forepaw hard across the ground to steady herself as she shut her eyes tight.
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Yes plz!!

Stark's brow knit in concern as he watched her, for a moment worrying over the way that she had taken the news. Of course, just because he hadn't seen anything didn't mean that there was nothing there and so there could have been a lot going on. Stark couldn't find everything at once, after all. He reached out to nudge her gently on the shoulder as she steady herself, ready to catch her if need be. "How about we go back towards the Crook and get you some rest?" Stark asked hopefully. 

"I can catch something while you wait, if you want." The Alpha offered. He wouldn't force her, of course, but, what he wanted was for her not to rush herself when she was just getting out and comfortable again. Too much of a good thing, and all that. "I mean, not that you're the first to swoon in my presence," He teased with a small smile. 
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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It took a few moments, but eventually the world slowed to a stop beneath her. She pulled in a deep breath to steady herself with the intention of releasing it slowly, but instead she laughed it gently free from her lungs. She opened her eyes to give Stark a sidelong glance, her lips twitching upwards. "Oh, I have no doubt," Harlyn teased him, "How any of the girls in the Crook remain conscious when you walk in is beyond me."

Harlyn took another moment before pulling herself up onto all fours. She turned towards Stark then, her head tilting lightly to one side. "Rest sounds good," she admitted, though she said nothing of food - her stomach did not feel prepared for that, "Might I have an alpha escort home?"
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Stark stayed up next to Harlyn until she had her footing again. He grinned at her, nodding back towards the Crook. "I mean, it is a wonder how we get anything accomplished around here." He said with a laugh. "C'mon, lets get you settled." He went at her pace, happy to move as she wanted depending on how she felt. He didn't need to rush things and he had nowhere better to be than at Harlyn's side right then. 
i grew a human and unfortunately as a horrible side effect lost an organ - as such will be slow from time to time.
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