Broken Boulder if not for my shoulders

He had thought— hoped she would allow his retreat. More than anything, he needed solitude; space to let his grief fall out around him. Alarian was ultimately denied that relief. Instead, Lily rounded on him with harsh words. Perhaps her anger was justified— no, it was. Everything she said was undeniably true.
Alarian closed his eyes as her last few words hit him, lowering his head. His throat felt tight, closed. He just wanted to get away, but he couldn't— he was trapped. After several beats, hazel eyes cracked open and he studied her dully. It was longer before he spoke.
You can't help, He said finally, tone weary and stiff and breathless all at once. My mother is dead— my brother is here to kill me— I'm losing it. His eyes closed again; suddenly he was tired, too tired.