Broken Boulder if not for my shoulders

Alarian didn't miss the way she just said "yeah", first thinking it a cruel reaction— but he knew that was unlike Lily. He swallowed the information for now, sensing somehow that it would cause him more upset than he needed right now. More upset than they needed. Telling her at all had hurt; already he regretted it. Of course she would make him regret it.
Bitterness burned in his throat, but he tamed it as she prodded further. His only answer to her first two questions was a nod; her last, he could not answer for several beats, though it didn't matter because she kept talking. He wished she hadn't. Whether it was selfish or not, Alarian would not allow anyone entitlement to his most private information— the rawest of his wounds. He stiffened slightly, eyes cracking open.
Maybe I don't want to talk about it, Lily, The words were not harsh— not even angry, but tired. Alarian fell silent again; he was done explaining himself, done trying to convey his need to be alone with his grief. It had taken all the energy from him, and he knew he would sooner flee and face Lily's wrath later than try to convince her now.