Blacktail Deer Plateau i'm pulling down stars just to make you glow

Even though Saarthal looks away, Mallaidh finds her eyes falling back on her. She doesn’t particularly like way the girl speaks about herself, but is she not doing the same? A frown sits upon her lips and she leans forward and gives her a gentle lick on the side of her muzzle. Something encouraging, something to prove her wrong, but she certainly doesn’t have the words to try and make her believe otherwise.
 
When she pauses, struggling to get the words out, her pale eyes focus and watch her expression. The stress the other is going through resonates deeply within her and she frowns, glances down at her paws, and softly sighs. As much as the greyscale girl is opening up to her (albeit somewhat vaguely), she can’t find it in herself to do the same. It is not lack of trust but she wants to shed the past and get rid of it but at the same time she clings to it and can’t find enough of a balance between the two, so shutting down completely is the easiest thing to do.
 
However—but I want to try, with you—her ears fall back against her head and her eyes dart up from her paws, somehow not expecting this at all. The dating and official spot, she hadn’t realized were… serious, but she searches Saarthal’s face for sincerity. Mallaidh thickly swallows, shifting her weight to consider.
 
“I… don’t know if I’m ready,” she starts and anxiously shuffles her posture but she doesn’t move away from her. “I didn’t think I was ready with my last girlfriend, but… we kinda sucked at talking to each other,” she starts. Blixen talked a lot about her faults, similarly to Saarthal, but it’s not the same. She opened up to her for a reason, and to give her a chance to return and she feels compelled to do the same now. If she’s going to be happy, if she’s going to have someone to love, she can’t repeat the same ugly patterns again. “I abandoned my last pack because of my ex, because I couldn’t face her. She wanted more from me than I knew how to give and I’m not… good at these things. I like you. A lot, but I think I need to figure out some things,” she pauses and licks her lips, looking down.
 
Mallaidh lowers her head to the ground, pressing her nose against one of Saarthal’s front legs to keep close. “I think I could figure them out if you were around, though, and maybe…”