Redhawk Caldera break me shake me

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private for now, might open it later..? @Niamh

Charles knew that he was overstaying his welcome. He knew he should go. But... Outside he didn't have anything, anyone. It was a big step to take. There was food here, and shelter. The recent events didn't help, though he was glad he hadn't returned to Firefly Glen, now. He wasn't gonna, either. Hadn't intended it in the first place. But then.. where to now?

First he needed to quench his hunger, though. The coywolf had checked if nobody was there before he started to dig up one of the fresher caches he'd sniffed out. He had tried to hunt for himself, but... He was just so bad at it, and he was so hungry. Charles had looked to see if anyone was near before starting to dig, but of course it took a little while to dig it up. Finally his teeth found purchase on a piece of meat, and he started tugging it out of the cache.

It was perhaps a bit early yet for Niamh to conclude with any sort of finality that she was pregnant- but she felt fairly certain of it anyway. Irritability and fatigue had settled in, and while she bore no physical signs of being pregnant, she felt her hunger increase, and the hungrier Niamh got, the more hangry she got. So she'd begun putting a bit of subtle, yet tangible pressure on Phox, as her way of letting him know she would expect more food in order to nurture the growth of their next litter. He was an excellent provider, and she was fortunate that she had a mate who wasn't irked by having a hangry hippo for a wife. 

She'd buried a kill the day before, and decided she ought go dig it up so that she could at least rest a bit and have a snack she'd already hunted down. She would hunt again tomorrow, she thought, unless Phox caught her something. But for now- she made her way toward the cache she had created, with the intention of digging up the meal she'd caught and buried the day before. 

As she approached the area, she caught the young Glen wolf's scent, and wondered how long he intended to stay around. It'd been long enough, she figured, and that he ought to at least send a message to the Glen about how long he wanted to stay. Had he even told them at all? Surely by now, Bronco would have let them know where Charles was- but none of them had come for him, and none of the Glen wolves had even seemed to want to claim him at all. So they were either giving him some space to cope- or they didn't really care that he'd left. Not that Niamh minded taking in another packmate- but she'd had one rule set for him and she was keen to see if he'd at least been doing that. 

So when she caught sight of him tugging at the piece of meat that she had buried, and drawing from her resources, her mood darkened. She paused and watched from a distance, just to see if perhaps she'd misread the situation. Maybe he was adding to the cache- but that was definitely not the case. The slim, coyote-faced wolf was definitely pulling her meal from the cache, and she wasn't having any of it. "HAY!!!!" She belted, intending to spook him enough so that he might abandon his task. She picked up a stiff-legged trot, tail curled above her haunches. If he ran, she would give chase- but she sincerely hoped he would simply drop the meat and freeze, to make it easier for her to punish him.

A sharp shout startled Charles from the task at hand. As he heard the yell he startled backwards, sending the piece of meat he'd been dislodging flying through the air. Charles, from the impact of this, fell backwards himself and inelegantly rolled over his back to land flat on his face. If he had been a bit more alert and seen her coming he would've run or pretended to put something in there, but now he didn't have the time to run before she would already reach him.

Tail tucked between his legs Charles rolled onto his stomach. There was a pit in his stomach while he felt the anticipation of punishment and pain. Desperately trying to not seem like a thief and still hungry, he shouted, I w-was added something! even though the moment the lie left his lips it only made his situation worse because of how clearly guilty he looked.

[size=small]She watched as he was startled, and flipped back awkwardly- apparently, he wasn't terribly coordinated. Even if he did try to run, by the look of things, he probably wouldn't be able to out-maneuver her. He submitted and hunkered down into the snow once he'd rolled back over again, and the snow on his back made his fur spike up a bit, making him look even more uncomfortable. An apology might have done him some good- but instead, he spat out a shaky line that she felt was a lie. She was fairly certain that was her cache- and she was willing to risk a bet on it. [/size]

[size=small]She growled as she approached, slowing to a stiff-legged walk as she brushed past him to investigate the cache, as though to check and see if he maybe was telling the truth. In reality, she was simply searching for the evidence that she could use against him, which she found with a quick sniff about the area. "I could swear," She uttered with a quiet, but sharp hiss, "That this here smells like my piss," She said, "From a kill I made yesterday," She snarled. Without warning she whipped around and lunged toward him, skidding to a halt a foot or so from him so that she could hover over him like a looming shadow, a thrumming growl rumbling over bared fangs. "Lie to me again, Chucky!" She threatened, before she tossed her head in an angry circle- and dove toward him with snapping jaws. [/size]

Charles stared hungrily at the piece of meat he had dislodged from the cache, but he knew that there was no way he would be allowed it, now. He looked at Bronco's mom when she brushed past him, his body tense and flinched, and as she sharply reminded him that it was not just any cache, it was actually her cache that he had been raiding from.

Oh, if only Leta was here. She always bailed him out of these situations. But thinking about that alone was painful enough. Charles willed his body to come into motion so that he could run, run, run! Nobody here cared about him anyway. What was he still doing here? Who was he sticking around for? For Bronco to pick him up? For sarcastic nosy girl to bail him out, this time?

When she told him to lie again and dove at him with snapping jaws he curled up into a ball on the ground while he yelped, high-pitched and loud, in anticipation of the pain that would follow. It reminded him of the situation with Osiris, except that he knew only too well that this would be much worse.

This was a mom. A mom who reminded him of his mom. She'd given him the shivers from the beginning. Would that mean that she would hurt him? Would that mean that she would strip the skin from his nose, tell him he was ugly and worthless and a trash piece of waste of space?

Would that mean that she would hold him close and whisper in his how sorry she was for lashing out and kiss his wounds until they were raw and hurt but his heart finally felt soft and warm again as he lay cradled against her chest and felt loved, even but for a fleeting moment?

He shrank, and whatever instinct told him to remain still and small against the ground served him well. If he had made to run, or defend himself, Niamh would have used it as an excuse to take our her rage on him and tear him to shreds. As it was, she had less motivation to physically harm someone who submitted to her in a bid to appease her rage. She liked feeling powerful and feared- and it served to stoke her ego, even if it didn't make her any less angry. She took advantage of his position and stepped over him so that she could straddle him. She lowered her haunches against his in a display of dominance, so that he might feel emasculated and ashamed of what he'd done. 

She hovered her jaws just above the nape of his neck, so that her breath could fan over his temple. "You've overstayed your welcome." She said in a low voice. "Now get the fuck out of here!" She snapped suddenly, clicking her teeth together. She leapt off of him then, but dove for his haunches with snapping jaws- intending to spur him into flight.

Mature Content Warning

This thread has been marked as mature. By reading and/or participating in this thread, you acknowledge that you are of age or have permission from your parents to do so.

The participants have indicated the following reason(s) for this warning: selfharm

I'll open this up in case anyone wanted to pop in / say goodbye in any capacity, Charles is now just outside the borders. If no one replies I'll just close it up <3

He waited, he knew what would happen -- knew what should happen -- knew what he deserved. He shriveled against the ground as she leaned into him, pushing him against the ground. The anticipation of the pain was so much, pressuring his mind and becoming all-consuming. It would have almost been a relief if she'd done it. If she'd been like his brothers. If she'd been like his mother.

If she'd bitten him and tore into his skin. A part of him wanted it so badly, because he knew that was how it should go. Doing bad things makes others hurt you. And pain...

No

Being hurt was the only constant in his life.

It was a comfort blanket that he hated and feared more than anything in the world, but... It was still a comfort blanket he needed.

But she didn't do it.

He wasn't even worth being hurt,
being told he was worthless,
being torn apart,
being cradled and whispered sweet heartfelt apologies to, soft shhh's in his large ears, being absolved and forgotten; this later could not ever happen without the former.

Instead, she drove fear into him and then told him to go, adding insult to injury. The coywolf wanted to fight her, wanted to be hurt, wanted what came after being hurt. He wanted it so badly, wanted to be comforted and he knew he could never get comforted without being hurt first. That was simply now the world worked. He wanted it; either to be hurt and comforted or to die if his reality turned out to be a lie altogether.

He couldn't. A coward till the end, Charles scrambled to his feet and ran, barely even registering the snapping teeth as he set off with tears pricking in the corners of his eyes, his cheeks hot and his brain feverish and full.

For so long the pain had been absent. Ever since he'd left Easthollow.

Osiris had done the same; turn his face into the dirt and tell him he was worthless. Make him worthless in the pack.

Riley had done the same; turn away from Charles, only hurting him a little, told him to leave when he should've hurt Charles more and given him comfort.

Now it happened again, from a mom of all wolves, and the absence of his painful comfort blanket made Charles feel as though he would explode.

Towards the edge of the borders, much like when he had arrived, Charles tripped over his own paws and fell the last bit, stumbling down into the dirt. His body heaved from the exertion as he walked a bit further, towards the lake west of the Caldera. Before his heart rate could slow down, Charles screamed, loud and visceral. It was hard to tell whether he was crying or angry when he threw his head against a nearby rock, his body heaving with frustrated sobs while he dug his nails into his own nose until it hurt to accompany the pounding of his head.

I need you, mommy, he whispered to himself. He hated her, he detested her and he would never return to her; but hers was the only reality he knew. Outside of her grasp, with wolves all around him who did not adhere to her rules at all -- to THE rules -- Charles felt like he was drowning in the ocean.

The only life boat he could find was the pain pounding in his head and nose from his own doing. A soft blanket that offered comfort for at least a second or two before regret set in, that proved that some things in the world are still as they should be; as she taught him they should be.

Iris, you are WONDERFUL to write with <3
-Niamh out-

Her teeth clicked together in the air where his haunches had been, and he ran away, just as she had intended. She would pursue him for some time, but without putting on enough speed to close the gap between them and bowl him over as she did not want to risk hurting herself. He was worth so little of her energy- so she barrelled after him with threatening growls and snapping jaws, but she would slide to a halt once he had descended a good portion of the Caldera's slope. By the look of things, he'd gotten the point, and could see himself out. She felt no obligation to chase him all the way down the slope and past the borders, as she felt her point had been made. If for some reason he chose to loiter along their borders or try and sneak back in to steal the meal he'd intended to eat, she'd make him regret it. 

With a huff, she watched him disappear from her sight, before she turned and made her way back up the hilly side of the Caldera. Some ally Bronco had brought- he wasn't even willing to feed himself. She'd have to warn her son, the next time he came to visit, that she wouldn't let him vouch for another wolf. Not after his first charity case had become such a delinquent.