Phoenix Maplewood there is a girl in the lobby of a cheap hotel

a minute nod at her confirmation about knowing valette, eyes fixed upon her sister with unwavering lustre as if she feared the slightest slip of her look would result in the girl faltering and disappearing from sight like a cruel hologram. she stifles the wince at the 'papa' to breach the air and assault the tremble of her ears, still unable to come to terms with having to hear such a title knowing that it would never be used to address him ever again. but as she swallows against the familiarity of that lump forming in her throat, brows furrow at her mention of zephyr. chased her off into a rainstorm?? that couldn't be....she was well aware that zephyr could fall victim to blustery storms of emotion but he'd been so glad to see polaris, surely no bad day could've made him ungrateful to see lainie? however it is doomed to remain a dumbfounded speculation as the forming questions in relation to their meet up are utterly derailed by the question lainie manages to pose first. 

"Did you ever find Papa?"

it seems to echo from every nook and cranny located within the tightly knit trees, chorused by a plethora of illusive voices and growing more and more warped with every uttering. eventually it was but a steady hiss in the depths of her ears, impossible to circumvent despite the restless pinning of velveteen ears. 

her entire body shudders as if she has been plunged into the depths of the iciest of lakes despite the lazy slants of sun kissing her pallid figure. "i-" a measly croak as the harmonious murmur of rustling leaves suddenly seem to turn with the breeze so that cruel croons float from their masses to take turns stabbing out at the dejected dove.

'tell her polaris' 

'tell her how you missed the chance to ever see your papa again because you didn't think he deserved happiness unless it was because of you'

'tell her how you're a SELFISH COWARD'

'and now you think that because you've stolen one of his children you've redeemed yourself? pathetic'

it was too much...too much! why could he not have died during that stupid rockslide. why must she lose him TWICE, and for what? she hadn't even gotten to see him again, and she could've. she would do anything, ANYTHING, to go back in time and make the decision to visit him rather than avoiding it for fear of an argument. it was her greatest regret and she was doomed to suffer it for the rest of her days, knowing that her papa died not even knowing that she was alive. haggard eyes blinked woefully at her sibling, fresh tears burning forth to slip down upon dampened cheek fur. 

"i'm sorry" it jerks forth a hoarse sob, paws pressing hard against the spongy earth. "i coulda but..i was so stupid i didn't i was angry i...oh lainie he died not even knowing that i was alive and it's all my fault!"