Sawtooth Spire As You Wish

We was passionate. Sorry this is long. Lol

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Despite the harsh things she was saying Howl's initial response was to let a light chuckle and huff out of his nostrils. It was clear with her first statement that she was simply incapable of putting herself in someone else's situation. There was nothing he could say that would change her mind. Heck if he only had Star and their offspring and he planned on joining the pack he was sure she would have something negative to say.

It made him take a moment to look at her once again, realizing despite the scars and markings on her, she was still very young in comparison to many and himself. Ignorant of the realities within life's experiences. As he listened to her speak internally he found it fun. Does she truly believe that children born out of marriage don't deserve love? As though those children had a choice.

Her words were contradictory. That he didn't need to pull his own weight. That he shouldn't be allowed in just because he had children. Couldn't she connect the dots and see that he was attempting to pull his own weight so that could be the reason he was allowed within the territory. He also thought others describing his time there as "coming and going" to be ironic as well. The only reason he had to come and go was because he wasn't allowed to stay the night. 

"It's interesting... how you choose to see the world," he commented. "Despite how well I think I'm doing. It will never be enough," he said repeating her words. "You say it as though I'm unaware. As though I didn't say those exact words moments ago... Or perhaps you weren't listening. Why don't I recap," he began.

"Despite how well I think I'm doing. It will never be enough," I believe my previous words were "They deserve more of me" I clearly don't think I'm doing well."

"I'm being cruel and selfish" I agreed "You are right. It's not fair to them."

"My other children are bastards," you say. Bastard, being a term to describe children conceived or born out of a marriage? Let's go with born as it fits your narrative. In your eyes, Star and I are not mates. "We can't be mates. We're not even in the same pack" Then would not Star's children be considered my bastards? Who in your eyes should clearly be a second choice?

And "I shouldn't get to come and go just because I have children here." A sentiment I agree with and therefore "I'm going to try my best to pull my weight to earn such a right," And yet "I am not Sagtannet. I don't need to pull my weight here," And yet I'm choosing to. 

I am doing everything I can. To make sure all my children are provided for, cared for, and loved. Despite if they are bastards or not. That doesn't change how I feel about my children. That doesn't change whether they deserve to be loved. I don't need to pull my weight here. I don't need to be apart of Kaistleoki. Heck I don't even need to be in Teekon," he remarks her knew she would not have context for, but it didn't matter. "But I'm choosing to anyway. There may come a time when I am unable to enter Sagtannet or Kaistleoki, but I will try my damnedest to be there for all my children when they need me."

"It's the best I can do. And it's clear that will never be enough for you... But I'm not doing it for you. So think whatever you want of me," he finished ready to continue on his intended journey of water and food retrieval.