Ouroboros Spine [m] goldstone

making some assumptions!

the rabbit had been quite hard to catch, but in the end had the blackthorn girl triumphed.
several times she had seen kukutux lay out meat upon pieces of bark; she fumbled in front of the den she shared with @Kivaluk. her plating would not be half so neat, but on a low stump some feet from the shelter's entrance she arranged them and added rosehips.
she had heard the calls over moonglow, but they had not been for her. chickadee knew he had gone to answer them, but assumed this was only in his capacity as firsthunter. 
she waited.
the girl was half-dozing when she heard his step returning to their ulaq. she started and came awake, and warm, though her smile fell away to see the stiffness in his shoulders. rising and coming near, chickadee searched his face. she had lived with kivaluk long enough to know his emotions, she felt, but perhaps she was mistaken.

<3

to his credit, kivaluk tries to muster a smile for chickadee but it falters. the poison in his heart, though not aimed at her at all, make it hard for his joy at seeing her to break through the icy fortress he's summoned. he does, though, offer her an affectionate nip to her cheek.

he draws in a deep breath, slow, as if it was hard and lets it out. it makes him feel a little better, but this respite of the heaviness in his shoulders and heart returning in full force.

she does not ask. she does not have to.

my — he struggles with the word 'father' for kigipigak ( for kivaluk refuses to call him anything else, even in his mind ) has not been such for a very long time. the man that sired me, he corrects himself. in all the ways that mattered, the mantle of 'father' to kivaluk belonged to the sunking. he has chosen my sister ariadne as his new wife.

repeating the words feel like a palpable sickness in his throat: for more than one reason. sure, there was no actual biological relation between kivaluk and ariadne but still, there is a wrongness it brings about within him that he cannot shake. for the age difference. for the fact that he believed ariadne was simply kigipigak's new toy.

until he grew bored, until tartok summoned him, until his mood shifted. whatever excuse he bothered to cobble together for her and her children.

perhaps the ancestors will scorn me for wishing ill upon the marriage, his words are choked; catching in his throat. a part of him feels terrible but another part of him desires it. it was a horrible, awful war and he is afraid that chickadee might see something in him now that she does not like; and if it is so, may she decide it now instead of later. they should. kivaluk whispers.

and yet, he draws in another breath; a battered warweary soldier returned home. he wishes only for the embrace of his to-be wife but holds himself back: until he has told her his truth, until he knows she will still welcome him to her. this does not change my mind. it is wrong —

gaze hardens; ears flutter back against his skull. tail lashes against his haunches.

the worst is i cannot decide what i hate more: that i will be right and that he will leave her and her children, or that i will be wrong and that he finds her and the children she bores him worthy of staying for when my mama and i were not. finally, he gives voice to his true fears, wearily searching chickadee's expression for her reaction.

<3

her arms went around him; she pressed their flanks together in an embrace. chickadee had no frame of reference for any of this. maia and eljay were the love story by which she lived her romantic thoughts; they had been together so long and raised so many kids and it was what she wanted for herself.
but while kivaluk's pain was not relatable, it was not as if chickadee couldn't feel the agony pouring off her intended mate. and so she only held him while she searched for what to say, nuzzling his cheek and the side of his ear, his neck, his shoulder.
"it's hard not to feel replaced. why shouldn't you? he wasn't there, and now he is." her eyes searched upward at the lines of his profile; her heart thudded a little harder at how handsome she thought he was.
"and he's chosen someone literally close to home, which means he is going to stick around. like he decided for you. i don't think they'd blame you for being angry. i don't blame you either."
"think of it like this: you're both starting over. even if he screws it all up, that sounds like what he's doing. and so are you. you're a man with a good job and a lot of respect. you're going to be married and be a fa —" oh, goodness, they hadn't talked about that, and her cheeks burned like volcanic ash beneath her peach fur. "anyway, um, whatever he chooses to do, he's — he can't change who you became when he was away. and if he up and leaves again, then there's a whole bunch of people who will see the truth you always knew."

chickadee! his chickadee...

her embrace is welcoming and he melts into it; draws great comfort from it.

so very glad that she does not hate him for being this selfish and cold towards kigipigak; letting her words wash over him like warm, calming waters.

he draws in a heavy breath, her perfume filling his lungs, lingering on his tongue. lovely and floral.

yes, he drawls to her words. i will be your husband and father to our daughters and sons, it is this, he looks forward to the most. planting the seeds of their life together, of their legacy; embarrassment about the idea long since fleeing him.

i have spent some time thinking about this, though recent ...events... have helped to speed along the process, he quiets for a moment, drawing back only enough to search her face. i have taken Kigipigak's last name and then my mothers when he left and combined it with my home pack's name. but that is not me. that is not the legacy i want our children to bear. i was hoping we could choose a surname to take together. as husband and wife. to give to our daughters and sons. something that is wholly our own.

her kivaluk; the tension melted slowly from his shoulders and chickadee felt him open to her. the deep breath he took was matched by an exhale of her own; they settled alongside one another and she felt her face heat red hot again.
there was an act to the matter, one circled by her mind more increasingly as of late, even now! despite its inappropriate nature for this particular moment. the formal way in which kivaluk accepted fatherhood sent a shiver through chickadee, one she tried to hide, though the flash in her eyes would betray this; and when he spoke of choosing a new last name for they and their children, the feeling sprouted pink wings and glowed in her belly. 
"well, my last name is blackthorn. and the family name here is nuiruk, right? we could do something with that. moonthorn or something," chickadee grinned foolishly, slinging an arm around his shoulder and kissing his face again. "whatever we choose will be wonderful. we could announce it when we get married." again the cluster of sensations in her body.

she shares that her last name was blackthorn and that perhaps they could combine it together with moon. moonthorn.

kivaluk isn't against the idea, playing with the words of the moonpeople that he knows in his mind with a contemplative hmmm,.

the moonpeople word for the moon is taqqiq. taqqiqthorn? he tries it out aloud, accent blending into common. moonthorn might be a bit easier to say. he admits with a slightly sheepish chuckle; leaning against her.

yes, he murmurs against the shell of her ear, drawn to leave a small love bite there by a fire stoked low in his own belly, feeding off the heat and giving way to the instinct that had spurs it and the low husky admittance, you are my uummat — my heart, chickadee. and i...i have loved you for some time.

"moonthorn then," chickadee uttered in a voice that trembled with a thousand things as kivaluk wound his — very strong! — arms around her and she felt the press of his teeth against the most sensitive parts of her ear.
two things happened when kivaluk made his admission; the first was that chickadee's eyes filled with immediate tears, the second was that this pooling of desire flitted its way through her spine; "the day you taught me to swim, i think i — i think i knew. i think i saw it. because i already felt it."
her heart was racing. "uummat" chickadee whispered, raising a paw to touch his face, to smile into it as she wound her embrace around his shoulders; her pulse was galloping; chickadee knew no more words would be necessary.
instinctively she knew what she wanted, what they both did; to put in into practice produced such a sense of shyness that she could only laugh breathlessly, unsure of herself now but not unsure of him.
of them.
"i love you too, kivaluk."

Mature Content Warning

This thread has been marked as mature. By reading and/or participating in this thread, you acknowledge that you are of age or have permission from your parents to do so.

The participants have indicated the following reason(s) for this warning: references to sexual themes.

though kivaluk is touched that she can pinpoint the exact moment in which she knew she was in love with him, he cannot. there had been the attraction, of course, then the crush that had blossomed into something more like a seed growing into a sapling and then to a full grown tree, it's roots sinking deep into the earth. it had happened naturally for him, as had the realization.

a low growl of contentment rumbles from the depths of his chest, pressing his forehead against her chin for a moment. it is the closeness he desires, but even remaining this close, their sides touching, is not as close as he wants.

kivaluk, whom was once a young puppy and had fallen victim to the humping spells many puppies do, and though he had thankfully outgrown it, he was not necessarily a stranger to the act of lovers, of couples. though he imagines with chickadee, even before her cycle started, it would be a wildly different experience.

his heart rate rises to a soft gallop in his chest.

chickadee... he purls her name, breath hitching softly in his throat.

used my mod powers to slap a mature warning on this thread, just to be safe! <3

appreciated! <3

dizzily did chickadee wonder why they had not done this before, reached this point; why it had not occured to her until the very moment she shared her adulations of love with kivaluk.
she didn't recognize the tone in his voice, not audible, but all her flesh and bone answered in a deep and primal pull. the smoke of his voice was in her ears and her rejoinder was a low and breathless croon.
the full weight of his attention and now, this new volcanic thing; it enveloped chickadee, who pressed into his embrace without any more hesitation, marveling at how it felt like she was on fire in a hundred different ways.

no more words needed be spoken.

there was just him and her, wrapt in the lover's embrace.

---

it is only in the afterglow that wraps kivaluk warmly in it's own embrace; dewy-eyed and contentedly somnolent, does a thousand and one questions break through the haze and spark to life within his mind. was that ... are you ok? he asks, concerned only for her wellbeing; attentive.

a learning curve,  bit of awkwardness; their eager desires had won over all and she lay next to kivaluk still brimming in rosegold glow and so relaxed.
"yeah, yeah, it was," she said in a murmur, suddenly and still shy! despite all that! chickadee would be happy when that feeling stopped.
she curled closer and closed her eyes, listening for a second to the beat of his heart. "never knew it was all that. wonder if anyone will notice if we don't leave the den for a while."

sleepy-eyed, kivaluk peers at her to search her face, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek. to think, with practice it will only get better. he reclines; relaxed, thinking of how many children they might have and if, one day, their children might rival the numbers of the moonwoman and sunking.

mhm, he drawls and peeks an eye open as she curls closer. maybe. but maybe not. either way, what we do in our home is not anyone's business but ours.

with practice! better! it was a good thing they hadn't been facing each other at the time, kivaluk might have truly seen her face burn then! oh, wait — she glanced upon into his eyes at last and realized with a soft laugh that he might have seen a hundred things cross her expression — and that she did not mind it.
"in that case," she whispered, sitting up somewhat to smooth her paw across his chest, "i could ... practice again."
the moon would be high for a long while yet; the night belonged to them.

a warm shiver slithers its way down his spine; a delectable feeling that stokes the fires in his belly as she whispers her desires and trails a paw down his chest. kivaluk makes a low noise; breath catching in his throat for a moment.


he murmurs, your wish is my command.

and he draws her into his embrace once more.

seemed like a good place to wrap up. <3