Blackfeather Woods When I speak your name

The alpha walked through the forest after his howl to notify the pack of their leech. Hecate had been lucky, he felt like ripping her apart for lying to him and cheating his system. He figured her being ill and being casted out as a loner was a worser fate. Instead of having a short moment of pain she would suffer from whatever she had, no medication, no shelter, and most of all, no food. Burke could be pretty vicious to wolves that disrespected him. The male usually had a stoic expression but now he was still fuming.

This face changed when he walked past the heart of their territory, Red Grove. He lifted his muzzle and turned towards the clearing. His mate's bones, they were eaten clean now. Slowly he stepped into the clearing and with a slow pace he walked towards her bones. His nose fell down, not held up like he ruled the place. Even his docked tail fell from its upright stance. The alpha's pale eyes looked over her bones. He missed her terribly. Even he believed that his mate would live on forever, but she had not, and he was left behind. A sadness filled him.

Without Meldresi's guidance he was not the same. He had lost his other half, obsessed with work not to feel the loss, but as much as he didn't want to feel it, the sadness always returned. Especially after a moment of anger. Burke found that he had been softer after Meldresi's death. He should never have accepted Sebastian or Hecate. They were fine with the members they had, his loyal members. Burke sank down, it was more like a big 'ploof', sinking through his paws. The male felt tired. He laid next to her, like he did every night, only now she was a mere skeleton. "Why did you have to leave me behind?," he whispered so, so softly.

Since his return, Cicero had not been very sociable. He had been silent and had worked, but he had not seen even Damien yet since his return home. It would come, in due time. For now he tracked his Alpha, however, surprised, but not negatively so, at finding him near Meldresi's bones.

While Burke stood over the bones, Cicero approached from behind. He moved to stand beside Burke, and offered a thin smile to his Alpha. It was not hard to think about what occupied Burke's thoughts. "Life is fleeting," he said solemnly while he watched the bones. He missed Meldresi, too, and it was perhaps the first time that he actually allowed those feelings in.

Burke had not noticed at first when Cicero approached. He looked up when he heard footsteps close by and happen to look up in Cicero's face. Burke wanted to growl and bare his teeth but he refrained himself. Cicero looked horrible, all cut up and his face more sad than usually. Burke pushed himself into a sitting position. His pale eyes falling on the young man. "Cicero," he greeted and then slowly tarted to nod, looking at Meldresi's bones.

Burke wasn't going to state the obvious, seeing that he was clearly still sad about losing his mate. The male turned his attention to Cicero. "So you are back then,' he returned. "I take it it didn't go so well?," he questioned looking over his wounds. He wanted to know what had happened to the young male and how he happen to obtain them.

Burke startled, and Cicero would have understood had he told him to go. He did not, however, and for that Cicero was appreciative. He, too, needed someone to speak with, even though his lips were not feeling very complient to that idea. He would not tell anyone of Sheogorath, for it might shatter their opinions of him, or deem him dangerous enough to harm the pack and be a liability. For now, Cicero decided to lend his own ear instead; perhaps it would change later.

However, Burke did not speak of Meldresi, and seemed to have similar intentions. Cicero said: "Desna wanted to see Kove on her own time and effort, so Cicero let her." Perhaps it was for the best that it had not been Sheogorath in his place, although the outcome may have been the same. Except it was likely Kove would have found out about the dark beast that slumbered within Cicero if it had come to that, and if Sheogorath had not wanted for Desna to leave. Yes, this was likely for the better, even if he had ruined whatever plans Sheogorath may have had.

"The wounds are from a different encounter." Cicero looked away, at the bones, although it was not the sadness for Meldresi that coursed through his heart as he did so.

Burke drowned when Cicero talked about some Desna. He had to think hard to whom she was related to. The alpha male had not been pleased with the idea of Kove's children joining hence why he had forgotten about them when nothing had happened. With the mention of Kove Burke somewhat remembered . He just nodded in reply, not really having an opinion on what the girl wanted to do and what not.

Then Cicero started about his wounds. Burke wondered what happened but Cicero didn't elaborate on it further. "If you want we can talk about it," he offered. After all he was a therapist or well, trying to be one. Maybe Cicero had something to deal with. Just like Damien had. If only Burke knew how close he was to the truth.

In truth, while Cicero loved to talk, he did not enjoy speaking of himself or his woes much, he had discovered over time. In particular since the appearance of Sheogorath in his life, Cicero preferred not to share, lest he share the wrong information. It was perhaps because of this realisation that Cicero enjoyed prying loose other wolves' secrets so much; he knew that secrets were anyone's most prized and well-kept possessions. They certainly were his, anyway.

There was no real way that he could explain what had happened to Burke. Cicero did long to speak of it with someone, but he did not long for the judgement that would certainly follow. While Cicero was not ashamed of much, did not care for public opinion, he was ashamed of what Sheogorath did to him; what he did to himself, in a way. Cicero did not know of his father's problems in similar areas, and to him, it just seemed like he was going crazy.

Silence reigned between them for some time while Cicero stared at his mother's bones as though they were going to give him the wisdom and advice he needed. Eventually his lips parted to reveal only untrue riddles. "It was nothing. Just a scrape." Cicero had never been one to lie, but truth was so deeply hidden from the surface that he could not bring himself to spill it forth. It was not his love for Damien that he was ashamed of; only his physical interaction with the white wolf.

The secret weighed heavily on his heart, and though Cicero did not think most would care (his physical relations were his own choice, after all) telling anyone would not only inflame his own shame, but it might mean that word of what had transpired would reach Damien's ears, too. Those were Cicero's biggest fears in the moment.

More silence filled the spaces between them. Advice was necessary, but admission was far from the moment they were in.

If he was honest he had expected Cicero to start talking. But the male spoke of something that was clearly a lie. If he had talked about fighting someone Burke might have believed him, but it seemed far more serious than that. Still, even if he was a therapist he couldn't help the ones that did not want to be helped. The alpha looked at Cicero for a moment.

"You don't have to tell me. But do know that I am here for you if you want to talk, not only as you step-father but also as the pack's therapist. You might not see me as you father and that is okay, but you are like a son to me and you can always wake me when you are ready to talk about it. If that never happens that is okay too." Burke wanted to get the word out to Cicero. Burke wanted him to know that he was there for him and he had the feeling he made that clear enough. "At least you did work hard on your spy training and now you have returned I do have some good news for you."

It was mystifying to Cicero that Burke knew so much about him that he had never said. Perhaps he had been raised for a part by Burke, he had never seen him as his father, for he had been old enough to do much on his own already, and had not needed him in that capacity; at least not consciously. The distance between them was perhaps because of his own maturity at the time, but Cicero did not think that Burke had never noted. In truth, he had always been the one to think that Burke did not see him as his child as much as he did Damien and Potema, but now he stated otherwise. Perhaps the rift was based on untruths, but Cicero could not be sure. Perhaps the only reason he had never deemed Burke his father was because labels were not his favourite thing. Meldresi had only ever been his mother because she had birthed him, but she had only been mom for a really short time in his life, too.

Dropping the subject, Cicero looked briefly at Burke with his dark-rimmed eyes heavy, as though he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. He considered speaking, but it was not that he did not consider Burke his father, or that he did not trust him as a therapist; it was that Burke was also his Alpha, and to admit what had happened, to risk Damien finding out. Each revelation would prompt another revelation, until he was threadbare and there was nothing left to reveal.

He opened his mouth, though unsure of what to say just yet (and, perhaps more importantly so, what not to say), when Burke mentioned good news. Grabbing the straw of conversation as if it was a lifeboat in a storm, Cicero cocked an eyebrow. "Good news?" he echoed, and he awaited the news. Perhaps his tongue would once more loosen on the subject of his wounds later, but for now he was content speaking of this news Burke had for him instead.

Cicero did not talk further about what happened to him, which was only a confirmation to the therapist that Cicero was not ready to talk to him yet about it. maybe one day. The alpha tried to focus on the good news for Cicero. He was close to being an actual dark brother spy and they would probably need an official one soon. Who knows they would need to spy on. The male quirked up his lips. "The brotherhood has decided that you and your bother are ready to join us, officially," he returned to the young male. Burke was pretty sure that this was good news for the younger male.

Bure was pleased to tell this message. He didn't realize how soon he might need a spy. But for now Burke was stil clueless. "It is good to have you home again. Take a good rest. I am sure you will be back on your feet in no time." The male was pleased to have Cicero back. In this last year he had been turning into quite the family man, something he never thought he would become. Burke looked at the male to see his reaction.

Quick post form work x)

The good news was shared, and Cicero nodded. He had never put much stock into labels or titles, and deemed himself fine wherever he was placed, within or outside of the Dark Brotherhood; he trusted Burke enough to know that wherever he was placed was where he belonged. Cicero had little ambition, unlike the dark beast that slumbered within. For now, however, Cicero hoped that it was sated, and that it would stay away as long as possible. "That is good news," Cicero offered with a small smile on his face in response to the news — he imagined Damien had to be proud. Cicero wondered if he would see Damien before any official joining; it would be strange to be called before Burke and be officially made brothers if they did not see each other beforehand, but he would make due.

Burke then suggested he rest up, and Cicero nodded again. Cicero rose to his feet and bumped his nose briefly against Burke's shoulder in affectionate greeting. "Tell her Cicero misses her," he said then, casting the bones one last glance, before he turned away and melded back into the shadows in which he belonged. Burke had told him to rest, after all, and perhaps he was right. Perhaps resting more would make it easier; but perhaps it would only make the nightmares return.

Only time would tell, and as he lay down against a tree that he and Damien used to sleep at sometimes in the past, before things got complicated, Cicero started to drift off into an unkind dream filled with violence — a dream that, rather than Sheogorath, starred the white wolf this time.

Burke nodded. He was glad to know that Cicero liked his good news. Burke laid down by Meldresi again when Cicero was getting ready to leave. The dark male nodded slowly, missing his wife terribly still. Maybe it would never go over. He wanted to shut it all out but he had to process this one day. Maybe if he moved her bones it would be more of a finalization of her death. Maybe he would. Together with Kendra and Pietro. The alpha male nodded, signaling that he would before curling around Meldresi's bones again. He wondered if there might be some dark ritual to bring her back to life. He had a feeling that Meldresi would know such a thing. Pity it was her that died. With his mind occupied he sank off into thoughts thinking about his mate.

-end-