Broken Antler Fen Thinking out loud.

@Pearl

Sebastian was sitting on his thinking rock again. It was a huge boulder at the edge of their territory. It probably fell down from the mountains once and settled at the edges of their lands. Sebastian liked the advantage point, plus his coat matched with the rock. The hard surface also made him think of the mountains he loved. Sebastian was mostly thinking if he was doing this alpha thing alright. It was hard for him to find a balance between being nice and just being the leader. Maybe he should be the leader more because then his wolves were more likely to follow him.

Also another thing bothered him, something that Fallen said. She had been the only one to be brave enough to admit her feelings to him, but where there more? How could he not have seen that? Was he getting blind? He was so confused and what these females were feeling and if there was a battle going on between them to be at his side. Sebastian did not want his pack to split up because of female jealousy. This just required a lot of thinking, and maybe some advise from @Pearl. So he let out a long howl for her.

Pearl was peacefully dozing in a sunny spot when her ears perked up and heard the summons from Sebastian. Getting to her feet and yawning, she made her way over to the source, blinking up at Seb on his apparent alpha rock. "Watch out, I'm comin up," she called. The boulder was big, and she saw a good way to get up while circling it. In a series of leaps and bounds, she scaled the rock with little difficulty, and parked her small self next to her friend. If she thought about it, best friend, really. Huh. Funny how she'd end up crushing on him, but it seemed that she was one of those wolves who could act normally around a crush. 

Pushing feelings way off to the side, she gave him the usual shoulder-to-mid thigh nudge in greeting. "What's on your mind?" she said, smiling up at him. Maybe it was possible that one of the females spilled their guts about all of them, but it was probably because they were around him and in heat. When it finally came for her, and it was coming soon, she'd be on the outskirts avoiding everyone. Her demeanor tended to drastically go on the flip side, and it was better for everyone to stay away.

Sebastian turned his head when he heard Pearl's voice. He smiled faintly as she climbed on the rock. She was far smaller than him so they had no trouble to fit together on the rock. The grey male nudged her back, only softly, because he would not want to unbalance her. His pale eyes settling on her for a moment before turning his head and looking over the horizon. She always knew when there was something wrong with him. A soft sigh left him. "Well, quite a lot of things," he admitted to the female and dropped his ears a bit.

"I talked to Fallen. She confessed that she liked me more than just.. friends. And well, yeah. It was not really that fun, because I had to tell her that I don't feel that way. After all my focus has been on this pack and getting over Haven... as you know. But... she said something curious. She said that she was at least one of the braver females because the others wouldn't tell about their feelings. I've been blind towards her advantages... but what if I have been blind to others too? If I reject them would that mean they would leave me? Then I wouldn't have a pack left. I don't want to lose my pack, I just started...," he let out with one big gulp.

He let out a soft sigh, with an awkward chuckle followed by it. "Life is weird. I left RHC to find a mate, and now apparently there is more than one female wanting me. It is so weird to think that they would want me," he admitted, clearly also blind to his own handsomeness and sensitivity. "I don't know anything about heats, well of course the basics, but not the physiology behind it? Like Fallen confessed her 'love' to me, and spoke about others. But how much of that love is real if she is in heat?," he spoke, mostly thinking out loud. He knew he could tell Pearl all of this, mostly because she could probably give him at least some insight. Now everything was settling down Sebastian was starting to open up a bit more to having a mate again. Though with all these females apparently wanting him he was not sure if choosing any of them would be a smart choice.

She listened intently to his thoughts, not really expecting this much, but appreciated greatly that he trusted her this much. Her ears were perked, though drooped a bit along with his. But just as she suspected, it was one of the females, Fallen, that had spilled. It wasn't anyone's fault, but a long, fed up 'arrrghhhhhh' was drawn out in her mind now that she had to explain. After his doubts about the pack were out, she nodded, waiting until he was done before she said anything.

She had to smile and give a small snort at his clear obliviousness to his attractiveness. She'd do her best to explain what she experienced from heats, but everyone's varied even just a little bit. She took a breath before starting off. "Well, starting off with heats, most of it is hormones talking, and I shouldn't speak for anyone, but she probably does have real feelings for you, though 'love', I'm not sure. It depends. You are one of the only two males in the pack. Now I'm sure they wouldn't leave if you rejected them, it's just part of life, and heat makes females kind of irrational." she said, thinking vaguely of what would happen when she stared hers.

"Don't worry about the pack, you're doing just fine. It's just the unluckiness that comes with four females in varying degrees of heat at the same time." she said, grinning up at him. "Seems that you're plagued with misfortune, mister. Quite the ladies man." Of course she wouldn't reveal any feelings she had for him unless it came up. For now, he needed a friend.

Sebastian turned a bit to her when she started explaining. It was rather fascinating to hear. He was not sure why she snorted but her words were quite what he what expected. Though with some females Sebastian had the idea they were always irrational. What he liked about Pearl was that she mostly came over as someone calm, not quickly hyped up. Which was different from him. His pale eyes fell into her light green eyes. He realized that their territory matched greatly with her eyes. He smiled a bit as he took in a bit of her details. Not really noticing them before mostly because he was usually his over dramatic self around her. "Okay. So they won't leave me in their irrational mind? Because I am kind of in some serious loophole here, Pearl. If I reject them then they might not want to stay, so then I would spend time with them to make sure they know I am not the bad guy here, but then I might make their crush worse or something," he stated on a serious tone.

Sebastian let out a quite grimace when Pearl said that he just had some misfortune. That fact seemed always to be following him. His first crush dying, misfortune. His second crush not being able to be with him, misfortune. Haven 'leaving' him because she sprained her paw, misfortune. Now all the females in his pack being in heat, misfortune. "You could say that." The grimace turned into a bit of a smile. "I am far from a ladies man," he returned to her, though she did make him smile with that comment. His tail started wagging contently once more. "Sometimes I really need someone to calm down my crazy mind it seems. Thank you." Sebastian nudged her in a friendly matter. "Okay, so... How are you? This goes both ways, you can let out all your thoughts too," he offered.

Their eyes met in a balance of light colors, gemstones shining against each other. She looked down, a small, shy smile retained on her features. Pearl listened to his dilemma, for it certainly was a great one. She shook her head. "I can't say for sure, but I can try to talk to them for you. It's unlikely they would, though, especially if we got another male in here to balance it out. But still, not likely." she said, shrugging. Again, she couldn't speak for all of them, but as far as she could tell they could all be reasonable about it. She'd try and talk to them separately about it soon. 

Her eyes widened a bit when she heard the grimace, in a 'whooops' fashion, realizing his past love's lack of following through. Luckily, he turned it back to lighthearted conversation. Her tail began wagging as well, passing over his. "Welcome," she responded with a smile. What were friends for? He nudged her again, inciting her to talk as well, bringing forth a pang of anxiety and a trace of electricity from where he had touched. Pushing it aside, she smiled, knowing she could trust him as well. "It certainly has been interesting, I have to admit. A big change from the salty shores of Donnelaith, though I do love it here. Getting to know the new wolves is fun. I got to go hunting with Aduin," she said, smiling at him.

Sebastian did not really catch her shy smile as he was thinking about the possibilities. Her suggestion of finding another male was a good one, that might balance some things out, and if they had just a crush on him then they might like this other male instead. Hmm. Though he would make it explicitly certain that this male was not going to breed any of them. The pups that would be born in this pack would be his. It had been one of the reasons he started this pack. "I might go look for a lone male if one doesn't show up on our borders soon," he spoke to Pearl. "Good advise," he hummed, getting a bit more relaxed with his while situation.

Sebastian hummed while nodding. He could imagine that it was quite a chance for her. He smiled when she talked about hunting with Aduin. "I am glad you like it here. I must admit I am pleasantly surprised too. It will be excellent to raise pups don't you think?," he spoke idyllically. "Though I miss my mountains a bit, but luckily I got this mini mountain," he joked lightly, smiling cheekily at her. He looked almost boyishly happy in this moment. "Ah yes, sweet Aduin. The poor fella, he doesn't really know how to interact with all these females. Though I think once he is comfortable he will be very happy. At least I hope so, losing his sisters again was quite a blow to him. I often wonder what would have happened to him if I hadn't been there for him," he spoke in a softer tone. He was growing more of a dislike for Haven, not even for what she had done to him, but mostly to her own brother.

She nodded, enjoying the sound of his humming. It was a cute little quirk about him that she loved. "It will be a great place for pups, plenty of room to explore" she said, fending off images of pups that resembled both seated on the rock. "Of course, all hail Sebastian, King of the mini mountain" she said, laughing and leaning against him in good nature.

"He'll get used to it pretty fast, everyone around here is really nice." she said, thinking of how the boy's nervousness seemed to fade after she reacted nicely when he failed. "Well, it's a good thing you did. No telling what would've happened, but he's here now with a chance." she replied. She wondered what did happen to Haven, she had only heard that they talked and split. "What did happen with Haven?" she asked, pulling away and looking at him curiously.

Sebastian sat next to her, looking over these lands, most of what he was looking at was not considered theirs, seeing that he was looking over the borders. But what was laying behind them was perfect to raise a family, at least Sebastian thought so. He looked to the side at Pearl and smiled when she confirmed it was also great from a female perspective. For a moment he thought about her as his mate. She was always there for him, even following him without hesitation. She also knew him well. He was taken from his thought when the female joked about him being king. Going along with her joke he puffed out his chest and raised his muzzle in the air. He let out a playful howl. Just a short one.

He grinned and slowly started to nod as he could only agree with her. "He made the same mistake as I did, seeing females as like another creature," he spoke, joking lightly, though the male most definitely had, living with females he realized they were wolves just like him, not any different, having the same needs. "I'm glad I did, I would otherwise keep wondering about him," he spoke. A soft sigh came from his lips. "We would settle the north of your pack, at the beach. One day she went away without saying anything. Aduin and I looked for days, as you know, before giving up on that search and going our own way. Later she returned to me having some sob story about how she sprained her paw and couldn't return home with all the snow. Though, if she had been around the area we wanted to settle she would have heard our howls, we searched for days in every direction. She was foolish enough to wander too far. I pointed this out to her and my suspicions were confirmed that she was not ready to settle. She is an explorer and if she would be with me she would have been chained. She was younger than me, so I guess that is reasonable. I didn't want to settle down like that when I was 1,5 years old," he spoke.

"So, that just means it didn't really work out between us. She wanted me back but I told her I did not want her back yet. She would need to explore and do her things first. She said she would be in this area but I haven't seen her around. So I guess that means she actually took my advise. If she will return I would not know yet I did tell her that I would not wait around for her to show up again," he explained to Pearl. "I was sad in the beginning, but now, having this pack and members to care for my need for a mate was a bit of a second priority. Although, now everything is somewhat calming down I still kind of miss someone at my side. Maybe if I had a mate this whole thing with females and their heats would have been all avoided or something," he spoke with a light shrug. "I guess I did learn to restrain myself," he then tried to job a bit.

omg this is too cute

 

She laughed at his little howl, and offered one of her own in turn. "All the ladies are swooning, the royal highness Sebastian is seeking an eligible maiden to rule by his side," she joked, putting a paw to her head in mock swoon and a grin. 

Resuming previous seriousness, she heard the tale of what had happened to the previous 'power couple'. She could sympathize with Haven on this one, Sebastian was being a little hard on her for something she couldn't have controlled. But even still, if she wandered so far away they couldn't find her days out, that was a bit of an issue. He summed up the point of the story with a moral he had learned from the whole experience, one that her mind poked as possibility central. How she wanted to tell him...but she didn't know what would happen as a result. 

"Well you did," she said with a shrug, not seeing a problem with how he handled the previous situation. The sun was beginning its regular descent down the western edge of the sky, casting everything in the pale glow of spring. Pearl looked up at the handsome male, a content smile on her face and lazily moving her tail back and forth. For now, it was nice to rest her head on his side, watching the sun go down with her best friend.

I know right!?!? :D

Sebastian snorted out in laughter when she made that joke. He really didn't see it like that, but her words did make him think. He did not believe that Fallen or Ambrosia were doing it to become an alpha but it could be a motive of some wolves. The male realized that being the mate of an alpha gave a female a right to breed and some females probably really wanted that right. He looked over at Pearl wondering if she wanted pups. It sounded like an awfully personally question to ask.

The topic was more serious again. First about Haven and then him restraining himself. "Well.. I have my reasons for staying in check,"he admitted to Pearl, those reasons were probably the only thing holding him back. He badly wanted to try it, and he felt like he was ready to be a father. But he would not do such a thing now seeing how his father did it and how it made Sebastian feel after he was old enough to understand. He didn't want any of these females to feel how his mother felt. Unhappy. He looked at the sun that was going down, Pearl's fur seemed to shine in this light.

Sebastian looked away before he was openly staring at her. "Should I take Haven back if she comes knocking on this border?," he asked her, curious for her answer.

She wondered what his reasons were, and what made him flip out believe so strongly in his morals when he faced the temptation of doing the do. She simply hummed in answer, that story could wait for another time. Pearl noticed him looking at her for a bit too long, and returned a cheeky smile with a wink before laughing. It just felt so natural to be next to him, where she could be herself and goof off. Of course, the war about telling him about her feelings was still being waged in the back of her mind. It was such a stupid thing, but she felt as clueless as he was, he'd have to pick up on it eventually. If he didn't, she'd be left to accidentally kiss the goofball when he was being adorable. 

He asked about Haven, to which her immediate response was oh hell no. But thinking about it, jealousy still nagging at her, it would be fair if he chose not too. "It's your choice, but if she simply wants in the pack, I don't see a problem, though it might cause some tension. Taking her back relationship wise , I don't know if it would work out or not, honestly." she said, not really knowing where to stand on the issue.

I TOTALLY FORGOT BURKE MET PEARL ONCE!! Did she ever tell Seb? :P #Bonding

Sebastian had caught her hum when he spoke that he had stayed in check. Was it a pleased hum? Or a curious one? Sebastian was almost on the edge of his seat mentally to hear what the girl meant by it. Should he tell her about his father? Maybe he should. She was his best friend. But he didn't want her to think differently about him, but then again... Ambrosia hadn't... The male caught on to the topic of Haven. "It is true that it might cause some tension seeing that Haven can be demanding and she knows what she wants," he spoke. Sebastian also had the feeling that Haven would act like she want to be in his pack and then later he would have to realize she was trying to get him back. Alas he would never know for sure. "She isn't here, and I am not going to wait for her. Maybe she won't even come back," Sebastian spoke then with a nod. Unknowingly calming Pearl's jealousy.

Sebastian glanced at her, clearing his throat a bit. "To get back to what we talked about before...," he spoke to her. "The only reason I have such strength is because of my father. Believe it or not, we look alike and now even my path has the same temptations as he had. It is a long story. But basically he couldn't keep himself in check and fathered all these pups by several females. I was ignored by him, talked to him about it but he said he had been too busy keeping his pack afloat, which I can understand a bit now, yet still. He could have said hi or something. He just ignored me like I didn't existed. But I did because of his mistake. And I would never want my children to go through that. I want to offer them a family," he admitted to her, and then smiled a bit.

OOO She did not

Pearl shrugged, relieved at his conclusion. "You never know," she said, at the same time hoping, as much as she liked Haven, that she wouldn't try and win him back. Not that she thought he even would, after his assertive opinions about her. 

Sebastian relapsed back into the story she thought was going to be told at a later time, but accepted it gladly nonetheless. He mentioned his father, to which she had to laugh when he said she wouldn't believe they looked alike. She let him finish, drinking in every word, before explaining herself. "I'm sorry, but I've met your father already. I understand what you mean when you talk about him. Not that he did anything to me," she said, hurriedly throwing in the last part as a reassurance. 

He talked about having a good family for his pups, making her smile before glancing at him. How did she get so lucky to be found by him that one sunny autumn day in the meadow? "I want the same for mine, pups growing up happy and loved," she said, images of those pups coming back to mind. She wasn't completely sure if she was ready to be a mother, but the idea of it was exciting, making her chest swell slightly and a smile to come. Really, it was hard to tell when she stopped smiling around him.

Sebastian blinked when she said that she had met his father. "W-What?!," he let out and looked at her. She had never even mentioned this to him!? She had met his father. Yet she was still okay with hanging out with him? Sebastian as a bit baffled she even survived a meeting with him in the first place. Not that she couldn't protect herself but Burke could be rather mean and horrible. Yet, luckily he had not touched her. That was most important to him. He was a bit silenced by it all. "I'm glad it didn't change you image of me then. I am not sure if I would have survived without your advise or friendship," he admitted and looked at her.

Sebastian kept his eyes on her when she had the same wishes for her family and for a moment there really was a question in his head that Pearl might be the perfect mate for that. Sebastian quickly looked away. She probably didn't feel that way about him and even if she did then it might be too soon. After all some of the females had a crush on him and he had told Fallen that he hadn't been looking at anyone yet. But now he was definitely seeing Pearl in another light. Yet the young male also kind of wanted to win her heart. So maybe from now on he could do little things for her? Let the other's calm down first with their crushes and then slowly start spending more time with him. See how she would even react to his courtship. One moment of doubt did make him think for a bit. Was he willing to open his heart again? It could get hurt. "So um... Is there anyone that might be a candidate?," he asked.

*fangirl flailing*

 

Pearl looked at him with eyebrow raised. It didn't make any sense of why his father would ever change her opinion about him. "Of course not, Seb, parents don't define us," she said softly, the last bit he said hitting home with her. Sheepishly she looked back. "Me neither," she said, smiling, yet desperately trying to restrain herself. 

 She wondered briefly why he looked away, characteristically imagining random reasons why. He finally asked her if there was anyone in the line up to which her heart responded with 'alright. enough.'  She had to hold back a fit of laughter before managing to calm down enough to speak. "Weelll, there is this one guy, pretty handsome and adorable. Bit of an awkward dork, though." she said in as much of a normal tone as she could before laughing and reaching her head up to kiss him.

Haha so cute! Sebastian though x'D His brain might have stopped working. xD

Sebastian was still not convinced by that idea seeing that he had been judged quite often for being the son of Burke. Most of that was before his time in Teekon. He was glad that Pearl did not have such a thing at least. She was a good friend and knowing that she had met his father he felt another piece of weight fall from his shoulders.

Sebastian didn't ask that question to find out of she had a crush on him. He was mainly curious about the idea of what type she would like. Sebastian's ears popped forward, not sure if he was feeling jealous or not until she gave him a lick. HIM. Sebastian looked a bit baffled and shocked at her. "Me??," he let out sounding so surprised and shocked.

"But... you are my friend and... I thought you wouldn't like me?," he asked. Then his eyes squinted a bit suspiciously. "Is this your heat talking?," he asked, sounding unsure and sniffing her out, though he didn't smell anything. Sebastian was again so adorable. He then realized that Pearl was the third that had a crush on him. "I like you too, but... until moments ago I kinda still saw you as a friend. But... I do think there could be more, but... the others. I know.. they have to accept it... but.. I wouldn't want to hurt them. But we can do things together right? I want to do things together! I want to prove myself that I will be the best mate ever!," he babbled, not really sure what he had been babbling about.

Pearl leaned back a bit from him, not quite expecting this reaction, but something similar at least. As always, he was being his usual manic adorable self when faced with the affections of females. She only nodded and let out an "mmhm" sound to his initial response. For the rest, she simply sat back and enjoyed the show with a loving smile. It did sting a bit when he mentioned he thought of her as a friend until now, but he continued the babble to the point of saying he would prove to be the best mate ever. Ah, Sebastian, from doubt to conclusions in a snap. 

"Of course we can do things together, Seb," she said, heart swelling to the point of licking him again. "Trust me, they'll get over it pretty fast." she said, having not stopped smiling at him since the outburst. He probably couldn't tell what he was saying anymore, so she didn't mention the last part just in case. She knew it was a lot to take in for the oblivious ball of fluff, so she still kept that small bit of distance apart, though she longed to be right at his side.

Sebastian had to have his adorable freak, and rambles. He smiled when she wanted to do more things together. He instantly was trying to think of some ideas that they could do. Maybe some fishing, then they could talk and have a meal afterwards! Sebastian tipped his head a bit when she said that. "Are you so sure about that? Don't females hold grudges or anything?," he asked to be sure. That is what he mostly knew from females, some of them were truly scary sometimes. Still, some decisions would have to be made if one would stand in the way of his happiness.

Sebastian gotten another lick. He smiled at her and then leaned his muzzle in closer before giving a lick back on her cheek. He was so careful. His tail patting happily against the rock. It felt a bit like a secret now, one he was probably not going to be able to keep for very long. "So, we could go fishing as one of the activities and maybe some swimming. Would you like that?,' he spoke, something he didn't know was that she liked fishing too, just like him.

She really didn't know how they would react, but since most of it was hormones and would blow over eventually, she was sure it would be a passing thing. They barely even knew him! "Somewhat, but I don't think these will." she said, giving him a cheeky grin. Who was she to speak for them? But no matter, her mind was already concerned with different matters. 

She got affection returned to her, making her smile even broader. She hadn't been expecting that so soon, but it felt good. Her tail was keeping time with his on the rock, happy. He started to talk about activities to do, which was a brand new idea to her. But it sounded like fun, as long as she got to mess with him. "Yes, I'd like that a lot. Of course, I'd win at fishing." she said, not knowing he liked it as well.

Sebastian took her word for it. He was grinning at her in return. Though he quickly shook his head. "Nuuhhhhhh. You should be bad at fishing and then I, with years of experience, can catch the biggest fish. So I will impress you," he spoke, revealing his plan and puffed out his chest a bit. If she was good at fishing then he might needed to find other ways to impress her, after all he wanted to show her he would be there to provide for her when she was in times of ... need. Sebastian looked at her with a bit of a smug smile. Kind of liking the playful banter. Sebastian was very excited about it all.

The male watched her for a moment. "The sun is setting, we should return to our sleeping pile," he stated to her. His nose nudged her. "So you might want to make sure that you are sleeping next to me then, because after all I am totally a ladies man," he joked. Though he was kind of serious. He pushed himself to his feet and shook out his fur. He liked their private moment, and he wanted many more.

Pearl had to raise eyebrows at that, an 'okay bigshot think what you want' kind of way. "Mmhmm, I'm sure you'll catch the biggest, but can you catch more than me?" she laughed, teasing him back for puffing out his chest. She looked forward to all that could happen in the future, especially these so called 'activities'. 

She watched the sun and nodded to his suggestion, though she didn't really want to leave. "Yeah, probably should. But of course, I'd want to fend the others off." she said, winking at him as she took a leap off the mini mountain and landed gracefully for once. She smiled up at him, tail wagging, waiting for him to walk back together.

Sebastian jumped off the rock after her, while she was looking at him. He almost stumbled over his own paws but he did happen to land gracefully next to her instead of on top of her. "We will have to see during fishing then," he made his final statement about that. He had no clue that Pearl could even fish but Sebastian was more than happy to have a bit of a challenge. It would mean that the rest of the pack could eat from that too at the end of the day. Sebastian was more than happy to share his meals.

"If I fight would break out, I will tell you know, I will have no clue what to do," he spoke to her. It was true because then he would probably stop it and choose for Pearl and then his whole taking it slow and seeing where things would go would be ruined. He walked next to her as they walked back to their other pack members, kind of surprised by this whole thing happening.

Last post from me! Feel free to wrap it up on Pearl's side and archive! :D