The Sentinels it's too late to rupaulogize

@Eilidh?

on his mother's suggestion, but mostly because he was a guilty asshat, Cas made himself leave the den. the pain of his girlfriend's death was ebbing, though the guilt of their last interlude had wedged itself solidly into his heart. he had not left her with words of love, and that would torment him always.

yet today was dedicated to the mending of bridges. his ear was healing, though it was a tattered stump of its former self, and his muzzle had been deeply scarred. "better stay away from water," he told himself grimly, lowering his nose to the earth to search for the trail of his sister's scent.

<3

Eilidh often spent her time knee-deep in dirt, digging through rotten trees, tugging at moss, or else trying to rustle up herbs for her healer cache, and didn't have time to fool around with drama or petty grievances. Whatever happened in the pack's day-to-day life, Eilidh was vaguely aware of it, like a horse is of a fly on its back. But in reality Eilidh didn't often pay attention to the goings-on around her, at least if it didn't directly effect her, and perhaps that was why her brother hated her so. But she wasn't about to change to suit his needs.

So when she heard him mumbling to himself nearby and caught his scent on the wind, Eilidh froze mid-dig and waited. Was he coming to find her, or was he just walking and talking with someone? She placed her paws gingerly in the freshly dug earth beneath her, which she was readying for a garden near her herb cache, and waited to see what would come of her brother's presence.

maybe it wasn't so bad that he had all these healing scars and half his ear gone. he could play the tragically misunderstood antagonist. or an actual villain. or a good samaritan wounded whilst trying to save innocent pups. whatever it was, Cas was beginning to believe his wrecked visage did not detract from his good looks, but lent them an air of mystery and intrigue.

his sister's pale pelt came into view and the boy froze for a moment, before taking a deep breath and moving toward her. "Eeelay," he called, ears wilting. "i'm sorry. i'm a giant buttfaced idiot and i'm sorry." 

Shit. He found her. Eilidh turned her gaze upon him, cold emerald eyes staring daggers into him. His ear wilted, and he whined softly as he came toward her, doing a terrible job at apologizing. She stood ankle-deep in freshly dug earth, bits of the loam caught in her golden fur, as she watched her brother approach. When he got close enough, she recoiled with a growl, warning him to keep his distance. She'd hear him out, but if he thought he could come cuddling up to her, he had another thing coming.

You're sorry? For what, exactly? She eyed him, standing firmly in the earth that granted her such knowledge and power, and waited for his explanation. Was he sorry for calling her stupid? For cussing at her? Or for assuming that his life was so important that every young lady, including his sister, should be so absorbed by him that the rest of the world fell away? Eilidh waited silently, watching him with her cold eyes, ears held forward on her skull.

she was strong; it exuded from her, intimidating the boy somewhat. he paused before he reached the reach of Eilidh's teeth, dropping to his belly as much from consternation as from sorrow. apology flickered in his eyes; he rolled to his back, pawing at their air between them with wordless whines. surely she could see how sorry he was! why must she be cruel? why could she not forgive?

all at once the stress of the past few days gripping Casmir, choking off his sounds; they turned from a pathetic sort of chiming into genuine and open sobs. he huddled against the ground, his sister all but forgotten; his body heaved with the force of his sorrow, and he cried loudly for what had been lost.

Eilidh watched her brother warily, wondering what he hoped to gain from his display of subordination. Her emerald gaze was chilly as she watched him paw at the air in front of her, an ear flicking back to indicate her annoyance. Whatever he was trying to do, the trick wasn't working. She would have laughed if she knew what he was thinking; Eilidh was not a cruel creature, but some things weren't so easily forgiven.

Then something changed in his demeanor, and she watched in sad horror as her brother huddled on the ground and cried. Literally cried. The medic apprentice watched in silent trepidation, wondering what she should do. There was little point in being angry with him when he felt so god-awful, but he surely wasn't feeling bad about being mean to her. Casmir didn't have to say it, but he was feeling sorry for himself, for losing the one thing he loved more than his own skin - Behati. Eilidh had never seen the attraction between the two, but then again she didn't understand much about love.

After a moment, she sighed and stepped toward him, not forgiving her brother for what he'd done and said to her, but at least knowing he didn't need her coldness in this moment. Cas, stop crying. It's going to be okay... She didn't know that for sure, but she had to try to make him feel better. She pressed her nose against his forehead, hoping he would calm down with the gentle licks she placed there.

Eilidh approached him, and though Casmir tried to pick himself up again, he fell into fresh sobs. everything was ruined -- Behati was dead, Aria hated him, he was sure, and now he'd destroyed whatever vestige of relationship he and his sister had once had. "everything sucks and I hurt you too," he mumbled in a watery voice when he had finally composed himself. the idea that he needed to leave Donnelaith sparked again -- it wouldn't be so bad, maybe.

"i don't know what to do, Eee-lay. everything i touch turns to shit." gold eyes searched for the calming expression of his sister's own -- he watched her attentively. hopefully she would know what to do.

Sorry for the delay. <3

Eilidh's ears slid back on her skull and though her brother couldn't see it, her face contorted as he spoke. Everything he said was true, of course, but how could she say that to him? Casmir was already feeling terrible enough without her laying it on thicker. You did hurt me, and your apology sucked. But I don't hate you, Cas. I could never hate you. No matter what stupid shit he pulled, Eilidh would always love him -- he was her only brother left, after all, and they needed to stick together.

Her frown deepened again as he complained again. Have you ever thought that maybe things 'turn to shit' because you don't think before you act? It was not meant as an accusation, but she was sure he would take it that way. What I mean is, we're both young. We are both rash and take actions without thinking sometimes. Do you think it could just be because you're young?

no prob!

Cas picked up what Eeelay was putting down -- he bristled a bit at her acting like she never did anything stupid, then reminded himself that she hadn't. he was the one constantly getting his ass into trouble. "you're probably right," he rejoined in a slightly grousing tone. "i let things get away from me and i didn't know what to do, so i didn't do anything." 

through a slightly watery gaze, he glanced up at Eilidh. "how did you get so much smarter than me, anyway? and where do you think Connie went?" would he ever come back, and for that matter, did Cas even want him to come home? maybe Eeelay did.

If Eilidh could hear his thoughts, she'd laugh at his notion that she never did anything stupid. Eilidh remembered vividly doing something very stupid once, but Cas hadn't been around to see it. While he and Behati had scouted for these very woods, she had ran away, convinced that nobody loved her or thought she was worthy enough to help find their new home. Of course she'd come home eventually with her tail between her legs and with the knowledge that she was a worthy wolf, but not very good at scouting. Even if she knew these things internally, she couldn't share that with Cas, because she wasn't a mind reader.

Learn from it, Cas. You can only get better from here, I promise. That 100% had to do with what he did next, but Eilidh had a feeling that he would be fine in the long run. After a moment, she laughed softly and shook her head. I'm not smarter than you, Cas. I just use my brain differently than you do. As for where she thought their brother went, she wasn't sure. I don't know where he went. I hope he's alright, though, and that he'll come eventually. She would like nothing more than to have her brother's twin back with the family.

we should fade this and have a new one soon! <3

used her brain differently. that pretty much summed it up; a smile tugged at Cas' mouth, but fell flat of full humour as he considered where his brother had gone, and if he would ever come back. "wanna hunt, sis?" he asked abruptly, nosing her shoulder and beginning to move toward toward the edge of the territory. he wanted to forget for a little while. and if he couldn't have Aria, he would funnel his rage and grief into the one skill he had honed all these months.

Sure thing! Last post from me. <3

Though Eilidh wasn't sure anything had been accomplished in this meeting, she nodded when her brother asked her to hunt. She shook the dirt from her coat and stepped from the overturned loam to follow him. Her ears pushed forward and eyes widened in anticipation. Let's get something for Mamma, too. After all, Blue Willow had been somewhat confined these past days, and she wanted to make sure her mother was properly fed during her days apart.