Blackfeather Woods how deep is your love

She listened to what he had to say. So it had been an inquiry, nothing more. Well, that was fine..she supposed. Earning her specialty she would choose over such a commitment as having children. "I understand," But she wasn't sure Burke understood. How would he know? He wasn't the one the had carried Pietro and Kendra, nor was feeling the way he did. It was something else entirely! It wasn't meant to be disrespectful, but she was not herself, she didn't feel herself. She didn't even understand. "If I ever have children, they will be created for a purpose, not for decoration," she wanted that to be clear, but not just to Burke. While she did not currently plan on bearing a brood, if she did they would be thrust into the Brotherhood, regardless of if they wanted to or not. Besides, she had full confidence that if they were truly the spawn of her and Kove, they would. "Perhaps if the Brotherhood is short on members. Why else? I will not be someone who has children because they can, and has them even though they are not in the right position to do so," She babbled, getting lost in her own thoughts. It was like everyone had to know. 

"It's not that I don't want to.. I just-," She sighed, not knowing what to say next. She had not even admitted this stuff to herself, and was defiantly not comfortable admitting it to Burke. He was her Alpha, and although he was a counselor.. he was like her boss.. and it was awkward. But she could not help herself from blurting it out."I DON'T WANT THEM TO BE SERIAL KILLERS!" She finally let out, but soon realized how idiotic it sounded. Great, now if he didn't think she was deranged before, he did now. "I mean.. what if one day I do have pups and I fail? I never had an approachable mother, I don't know anything.. what if I fail and they're messed up?" It was possibly the main reason for her previous hesitance to babysit Kendra and Peitro. What if she did something wrong and she screwed everything up. ''Who want's messed up kids, or even a mate that doesn't know anything but how to kill things?" It was simple. Her one joy in life had been wiping the earth free of things that she deemed had no purpose. That was what drew her to Blackfeather, being an Assassin, the whole lot of it. She could not be a child bearing, lovable mate that Kove had previously taken. Why even bother?