Barrow Fields Now you look at me like a stranger

Heldi laughed loudly at the look of distaste on his dark features at the mention of being a subordinate. It was typical of him to want to lead or so the bastard thought, he had surely been good at it when he led Shadowfax. 

"Chin up, it isn't so bad to be a subordinate. Gods know I did it well enough back home." Heldi sent him an encouraging smile, brown ears perking up in interest at his words.

He's holding something back. It became clear just what it was when he mentioned only Rana being with him. The others hadn't made it. A lump formed in the Vledfest's throat as she remembered Zephyr's mate and children. Heldi wouldn't force him to speak about it, she would listen if he wished to bring it up on his own.

"I wandered mostly, I never found anything to keep me in one place for too long. But then I started to have dreams, ones filled with deep water and a sense of guilt. I shouldn't have left, I should've stayed and helped the pack..it was cowardly of me. I failed all of you. I knew I had to find you and make it right, but it seems I was too late. Shadowfax is no more." The bastard's head hung in shame, tears pricking her eyes though she refused to let them fall. She expected him to yell, to snap at her and call her every horrible name in the book for leaving. Heldi wouldn't have stopped him either, the guilt hung from her frame like the weight of a mountain. She deserved any harshness he directed at her.