Silver Creek And suddenly I'm trapped

lilah was suddenly acting strange-- so very strange. much stranger than women typically did! especially lilah, who had always been the epitome of a good, easy, lady. she was quiet, only spoke when spoken to, and never did she dare speak her mind. grayson had known her since they were both pups-- she'd grown quite predictable, but he had never expected this from her. 

and yet, he didn't appear surprised. maybe it was because he felt he could handle women and all their whims-- maybe he just wasn't surprised a woman would become such a slave to her emotions. either way, he let her speak. 

"it is my job, lilah," he said, brow furrowing, looking upon her with concern pressed to his dark features, "it is my job to take care of you, and addison, and emerson, and prialux, and every other woman that comes to me. i do not put feelings in front of my work, because if i let them reign free you would all be in danger." all of them. hah! how could he run around chasing emotion when there was work to do? families to raise? scoff. lilah wouldn't understand that. never mind that grayson didn't understand that lilah was referring to the fact he wanted to bang every female in this god forsaken forest besides her. which, for the record, wasn't true. but grayson refused to close himself off from opportunity. "i care about you, whether or not you want to see it," he added, firmer, as if he was hurt, "don't you ever accuse me of pretending to care." his gaze averted hers, head turning elsewhere. even though grayson pretended... a lot. 

oh bother. here came that god damn self-deprecation. women lacked self-esteem, they always needed a man to tell them how pretty they are. lilah, it seemed, was no different-- begging for praise. pathetic. all women were. he let her finish her spiel, trying not to bare his teeth at her-- though if a man raised his voice at him like this, grayson might've snapped. "you, lilah," he said, gaze narrowing down his nose and pointed at her, "are beautiful, and classy, and sexy, just like everyone else." and then he waited for a moment, shaking his head. silence fell over them.

"is that what you want to hear?" he asked, challenged, even, though he didn't expect a woman to accept a challenge, "that i think of you like i think of everyone else? that i put you as just another woman among my ranks?" oh! but he did. and he absolutely used poor little lilah, poor delicate lilah, as a little trophy case. here's the woman i saved again! i am a hero! a man among men! i will keep you save too! but he would never admit that. to anyone except, perhaps, harrison. only because harrison did the same. 

"i am that same man i was before," he said with a heavy huff, white air raising him his muzzle in a cloud, "i have more responsibility now-- there are politics involved. how i treat others has nothing to do with the way i treat you. and i don't know how to help you see the way i look at you." the same way he looked at everyone else. opportunity.