Duskfire Glacier usurped
shadowhunter
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#1
Private 
aw but maybe @Rose?

He didn't feel the cold, not anymore, not when his heart was frozen solid, not when he didn't feel anything anymore. Hawthorn wasn't stupid - he was far from stupid - and he knew that life here would never be the same anymore, he knew that he wasn't going to like it here. The boy felt a deep, bitter feeling in his gut, the sick knowing that he wasn't going to belong here. Standing by the borders of the newly claimed territory, he exhaled sharply, observing detachedly the smoky vapour that appeared to be his breath.

He wanted to leave, but he knew he wasn't going to survive out there. Self-preservation still won out above all else, and despite all he felt, Hawthorn bitterly agreed to himself that staying here for now was the best decision he could make. That didn't prevent him from stepping over the borders, pausing, then crossing them completely though. A few metres away, the boy stood, a dark shadow against the bright, blinding white of the snow. Silent, unmoving, a ghost.
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

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Ooc — Belle
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#2
I think it's time for these two to meet, but if you don't want Kieran to make an appearance yet just lemme know!

Kieran was beyond joyful. His sister had been found and was recovering. She was here. She was back. And Kieran could play with her again, he could talk with her again, it would be just like before. Except that they were the hiers now. He'd only recently found out about it, but he was a prince now. The title seemed so high, it made him sound like he was above most of the others in the pack, though, truly, he didn't feel like he was. Heck, he hadn't even met all of the members yet. 

These thoughts were being processed in his mind, when he came across the not-too-familiar form of Hawthorn. Kieran was hesitant to approach, partly because Hawthorn had been the previous hier and Kieran was unsure how the boy would react to seeing the new hier. "Uh, hey," he greeted, though he didn't feel like the two would get along, it was always worth a try.
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#3
nah, thanks for joining! :)

He wanted to be alone; he thought that was clear enough. The only company he welcomed nowadays was his sister, the only family he had left. Everyone else, Hawthorn regarded as traitors and ursurpers. Yes, he might detest his father, and he might resent his mother for leaving and dragging his sister with her, but in his mind, he was still Prince, he was still the son of the two wolves who brought this ragtag bunch of wolves together and first made them into a pack. He was still the heir to this kingdom..it didn't matter if it'd moved..he was still heir, and that was that. 

So, of course Hawthorn was resentful when he heard the unfamiliar voice of the new 'Prince' greet him from behind. He exhaled sharply, bit back the profanities that threatened to spill from his maw. Instead, he heaved his shoulder in large breath and glanced around at the younger boy, now the Prince and heir, and offered him a half smirk and a sardonic bow. "What do you want?" Thorn drawled lazily, dark blue eyes gleaming and contrasting sharply from the shadow of his fur.

Haw knew it wasn't necessarily the boy's fault, but he still couldn't help but feel anger towards him. Well, not anger, but a deep, burning resentment and a feeling of injustice. He wanted to physically topple the boy, which he knew he could, but he resisted the urge. Rather, he waited expectantly for a reason on why the boy disturbed him.
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

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#4
Kieran continued to hesitate, and he remained silent for a few moments. How was he supposed to answer that? The boy just shrugged, then gave a short response. "I guess I just thought we ought to meet, that's all." It wasn't a complete lie, but Kieran had to come up with something so that he didn't look stupid. However, perhaps Hawthorn already thought he was stupid. It was clear in his tone of voice that he wasn't a fan of the boy.

Still, it was, in Kieran's opinion, unnecessary.
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#5
The boy hesitated, and Hawthorn gritted his teeth, biting back annoyance. It wasn't just Kieran, he hated any wolf who didn't know how to speak properly or seemed 'slow' to him. He supposed he should grant the boy some slack, given that he was much younger than the dark shadow himself, but still, Kieran knew how to speak, so the younger heir had no excuse whatsoever. "On what basis?" the corner of the child's lips tugged upwards in a somewhat amused smile and he canted his head curiously. "Do you think we need to meet, because as you are Prince, you have to get to know all your subjects now?" While the question appeared to be phrased in a carefully calculated manner - it had been carefully thought out - Hawthorn asked it without malice. He was genuinely curious how a boy born a Page reacted when he was promoted unrightfully to the rank of Prince.

Hawthorn smiled thoughtfully and turned to look at the younger boy, eyes narrowed for a moment before relaxing and gracefully lowering himself onto the ground. He didn't have anywhere to go, and as the initial irrational anger faded away, he found himself somewhat intrigued by the boy in front of him. Though, who knew how long the intrigue would last. Nowadays, most things bored him.
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

Mercenary:
0/5
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Ooc — Belle
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#6
Kieran tilted his head and then shook it. "No, I just thought that since we were in the same pack it would be good to meet." there was no irritation in his voice, though he was a little annoyed. Despite there being no malice in the other boy's voice, it was still a question that bothered the new heir.

Then he paused. What else did he need to say? Nothing, really, but it might be better to keep the conversation going - it might get the two on better terms. "So... what do you think of the new territory?" it was a pretty stupid question, but it was one that he had considered for a long time himself. He'd come to realise that he might one day he would be leader of this territory, so he had to come to like it - and he did, but it would still be a while before he was fully settled into it.
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#7
Hawthorn raised an eyebrow at Kieran's words and lifted a shoulder in a graceful shrug. "We have met," he deadpanned, blue eyes flickering with what appeared to be a distinct gleam of amusement. "We just haven't spoken to each other...quite rightfully so, given that we were both still learning to speak just some time ago." His tone was thoughtful as he spoke, but there was an underlying bitterness to his words, for memories of his childhood had started surfacing once more and honestly, he just wanted to forget. Was that too much to ask?!

Hawthorn grimaced and looked away, only half listening when the younger boy asked his question. He shrugged again. "It's just a territory," he answered truthfully. "I don't feel anything about anything. Golden Glade wasn't particularly nice nor was it home. Duskfire Glacier isn't particularly nice, nor is it home. Not much of a difference, if you ask me." He turned and offered the boy a coy smirk. "I honestly couldn't care less, to be honest. No offence," he gave Kieran a curious look then. "You're the heir to this land. What do you think about it?"

Bitter. Bitter. Bitter. Bitter were those words and Hawthorn fought the urge to find a stream and wash his mouth in it. No, no, they just didn't sound right.
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

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Much as he didn't want to admit it, the boy was becoming irritated, and it was not often he was irritated. Though, he kept his voice calm. "To have properly met, one should have spoken to the other." He replied cooly, not letting the older boys words catch him out. Kieran wasn't the best with words but he tried and the phrase he had spoken was one he had tried to think of while Hawthorn was babbling on. 

He listened, with a flick of his ear, to what the other boy had to say about the territory and it honestly made Kieran inwardly sigh. Did this boy feel nothing for the land he once lived in? With a scowl, the prince responded. "Just 'cause I'm the new heir doesn't mean you have to be so bitter!" Yes, it was a childish argument, but Kieran was a child and it did not sound childish to him. Normally, the boy wouldn't have never raised his voice, but he had wanted to like Hawthorn, and at the moment that seemed like a difficult task.
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Hawthorn could see, could sense the other boy becoming increasingly annoyed and he felt a deep sense of satisfaction at his observation. He didn't necessarily want to wind the kid up, but it was an added bonus — his main goal was to get back at Eden, and by being her child, Kieran had inadvertently gotten himself into Hawthorn's 'potential victims' list by virtue of the fact that Eden was his mother. It wasn't by any means, his fault, Thorn was clever enough to know that, but while he thought himself to be a person of cold, rational logic, he was anything but that. He was first and foremost ruled by emotions, and though he might deny and say otherwise, his actions spoke louder than his words. Although, if Hawthorn continued down this path, the likelihood was that he would become the cold, calculating, logical man he wanted to be. 

Right now, however, he was just a child. A child ruled primarily by emotion, who didn't want to be ruled by emotion, who thought he wasn't ruled by emotion. Right now, he just wanted to be a pup again, where he knew nothing and didn't need to know anything. The shadow boy never once thought he would ever want to know nothing, but now, now, selfishly, he wished he was dead.

And so Hawthorn's eyes narrowed when Kieran spoke up. His lips thinned, his muzzle crinkled as he pulled his lips back in a threatening snarl. The boy rose, muscle tense, and towered over the younger child. He had been large as a pup, and was even larger now, and instinctively used it to his advantage. "Of course I have to be bitter," he hissed bitterly, with a bitter expression. "I've lost everything. My father, my mother, my sister, my brother - who's dead, by the way - I've lost my 'home', whatever the hell that is, I don't even know; I've lost my title, I've lost my rightful inheritance, I nearly lost my life and trust me, now, I very wish I did; and along the way, I've lost everyone else except my sister, and even she, I'm about to lose. I've got nothing left, nothing to live for. The only thing keeping me alive is the fact that I want vengeance, and the only thing keeping me here is my sister, the only family I have left. Everyone else betrayed me, everyone else left me. So, yes, I'm soooooo sorry I'm soooo fucking bitter, but I don't see you losing your family or anything else, for that matter! You've gained an inheritance, a name, something, everything. I've lost everything and you've gained everything. So don't you dare say that to me, because I have every right, okay! And the fact that I haven't been tearing into your face, or screaming at you should be good enough, because honestly, I could've, and I didn't," Hawthorn exhaled sharply, eyes bright, glittering with what appeared to be unshed tears, but one couldn't be too sure. 

"So, don't tell me I don't have to be so bitter. Because you haven't lost everything, like I have, and you don't understand. You don't understand how it feels to have everything taken from you, then having the remains stamped on and tore apart. You don't understand how it feels to want to die every single day, from the moment I wake, to the moment I sleep, to the moment I'm sleeping. You don't understand me, so don't pretend you do, and don't sound so self-righteous about it either." He glared at the younger boy then, unsure about why he'd said everything to someone who he detested as of currently, but there was something about Kieran that intrigued him, and in a way, he liked the boy, though his other feelings clouded his judgement as of currently.

"What? Are you going to run off to find your mommy and daddy and tell them to kick me out now?" he sneered bitterly, looking away, trying to undue his previous minutes of complete and total embarassment. "Go on. I'll like to end it, anyhow. It's easier to die, isn't it?"
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

Mercenary:
0/5
Caregiver/Medic: 0/5

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tulip was innocent to the point of ignorance, even in the face of the disaster that had led to their fleeing. or so, she had been. bramble's death had brought to light her own stupidity, that life was as dandy as she made it out to be. nothing escaped the darkness, but never had she imagined it to usurp her life so viciously. but even after the death of her twin, she refused to be angry. she had plenty a reason to do be so, and yet, she could not. perhaps it was the passing on of her mother's goodness that had so deeply embedded itself within her personality, her morals; she could not shake the simple grace that she carried with, every step she took.

but she could not help but falter as she harsh exchange of voices stopped her in her path. she had been exploring the new territory, taking her time before her mother called her back; she had begun the process of living on. but the strained tones only increased and she veered towards, ears lowering. it was her half sibling, and a pup she had not met, and only as she arrived did one of them explode. hawthorn.

he shouted and she flinched. she felt his pain, and it felt too much. she had lost her other half. the one she had shared a womb, her brother. he had been everything, and despite her agony, she did not loose herself. she had not known hawthorn much other than his name and could not tell if it was the disappearance of their father, his mother and his brother that made do with his personality so, but she found herself frightened at this incarnation of her half-brother. 

“haw?” her voice peeped from not all too far away, creeping out from behind the underbrush with her tail tucked. she was not rose, and she had never been close to rowan, nor any of her half siblings, but they had shared a father. a father who had left them before she could hear his voice. rose and hawthorn were all she had left, and yet, they could not be all that she had. but perhaps, just perhaps, she could stop him from saying such mean things, such things that never had she expected anyone to say ever that left her shocked to the core. or perhaps, he did not even know her name; tulip could not do much but to lower her eyes away from the two, as if expecting their to not be heard or worse, to become the target of his vicious words too. “please s-stop,”
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Kieran froze as the hurricane of words hit him. He had known some if the things that had happened to Hawthorn, but he had not known the full extent of it. Kieran remained silent until Hawthorn finished, and then he spoke up, his gaze softened a little. "No, no I don't understand. I don't understand because you have dealt with things that I could have never imagined but that doesn't mean you have to take it out on me. You're stronger than I will ever be and I admire you for that, Hawthorn. Look, if I was able to, trust me, I'd bring back everything you lost - but I can't, okay? You have every right to be bitter! And I know it won't do anything and it won't help, but I'm sorry okay?!" Kieran caught sight of another pup entering, one he had not yet met, but the prince continued. "No, I'm not going to run away! I'm not going to let them kick you out! Hawthorn, you don't understand, I respect you! You've been through so much! Yet you think I'm stupid enough to do a thing like that? Think again, Hawthorn."
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"Tulip?" Hawthorn stared at her in mild disbelief when he caught her peeping from the bush, then murmuring his name. God, how many things could he do wrong, get wrong, in one day? He hadn't meant for her to hear that; she and Rose were the last wolves he wanted to have heard everything he'd just said because he was supposed to protect them, and how could he do that when they knew he didn't really want to live in first place anyways? Oh god, Haw had messed everything up hadn't he?

"Oh, god, I'm so sorry Tulip," he said frantically. "Look, you weren't meant to hear that. Just, forget everything I've just said, don't tell anyone and go back to your mum, yeah? I'm sorry, but I'll come find you and talk to you later, okay? I promise, but right now, I need to talk to Kieran alone. I'll explain everything later." Hawthorn didn't quite know what he was saying, if he was being honest, but it sounded something like what a big brother would say, and so he said it. He could only hope that Tulip would still listen to him, because god knows what would happen if she didn't.

Then, Haw turned to Kieran, a look of despair marring his boyish features for a moment before it emptied out into an impassive facade once more. "I'm sorry, too," he said, exhaling sharply. "I'm sorry for taking it out on you," he murmured, and perhaps it said something about the Pryor's growing maturity that he'd admitted his fault without being forced to do so, and genuinely sounded regretful about it as well. "It'll be easier if you were more like me," he told Kieran with a laugh, trying to ease the tension in the air. "Then it'd be easier to hate you. Unfortunately...you're quite likeable. I don't think I like that; you're not making it easy for me, Kier," he joked, quite aware that he'd called the younger boy by a nickname of sorts. They weren't friends yet, but Hawthorn was willingly trying this time, and he hoped that the other pup would not take offense. If anything, it was an invitation for him to call Hawthorn by his own chosen nickname if he wished. 

After all, Hawthorn wished to get to know Kieran better, and how else could he do that if they weren't even going to try to be friends? Yes, they might just have screamed at each other, but the boy held onto the firm belief that arguments made connections stronger, rather than weaker, and so in his mind, they had formed the basis of a strong connection.
if you can't fly, then run;
if you can't run, then walk;
if you can't walk, then crawl;
even if you have to crawl, gear up
aim your gun! ready! fire!

Mercenary:
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tulip can be skipped from now on :)

the other did not stop his verbal assault, and her brother could not hide his shock. she was not meant to be there, it was clear, and instantly, she felt misplaced. she had not meant to hear what had occurred, what trouble had transpired between the two, and for a fraction of a second did the worry that she would be targeted for her trouble pass through her mind, and oh, did her insecurities latch on. she trembled violently as her brother turned to her, wide-eyed with disbelief. was he mad? she was instantly sorry. but he did not reprimand her, he spoke of his own apologies. 

except she was not too sure. after all, never before had she been exposed to such hate in her life. she willed herself to put on a brave face and face the storm as the valiant Rose did, however, the constant squabble back and forth was much too loud for ears that had not heard such anger and she winced at every exclamation, both of sensitivity and timid emotion. tulip had no place barging in like she had, she knew it quite well. a little girl like her could do no impact on the tense situation despite her core need to make things right. perhaps the only thing she could do, was leave while she could. she had little choice in the matter anyhow. "oh, um, o-okay," her eyes shifted unsteadily between her brother and the other, unsure if it was in their best interest that she leave. perhaps should she leave, they would resume the bitter argument she had stumbled upon, and she would be left with not two half siblings but one. she could not loose another.

deciding not to leave, but to pretend -- the most nefarious thing she had done in her life -- she would just as easily intervene should she need to again. eyes cast down, she back shuffled, retreating into the bushed from where she had come. a part of her urged her to carry on, ignore the horrible emotions that circled the air, but she found herself rooted just beyond the scene, eyes carefully placed in view of the scene while ears flickered, listening in on every word spoken. she could not be as stone-faced and resilient as her older, half-sister, but she simply could not ignore the need for peace. if she was not strong enough to push them away from each other's throats, she would do her best to keep it from happening again. the two eventually spoke of forgiveness, of regret, but the girl tulip was still shaken. perpetually changed, she could not go on without reflecting on all she had learned about emotion; that such a thing as fury existed. she wondered if she had felt it before, and she worried that she ever would. the tremble in her hind, however, had not ceased and would not for some time.
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