Blacktail Deer Plateau He said "Peter Pan, that's what they call me,"

Listen to this or this while reading!

"Make it go away, Kieran, I don't-I don't want to feel this anymore. I just want someone to have my back, someone who's going to be there for me no matter what,"

"I'll have your back, okay? I'm here for you."

"Will you actually? ...Thank you. I'll have your back too."

On a night such as this, so quiet and still, with the stars and the moon lighting the darkness that swallowed the world, he could not help but reminisce. Elongated shadows crept from around the trees but he paid no mind to their stalking, for they reminded him sorrowfully of someone. A quiet, haunted boy. That boy, with his glittering smile and charming eyes, lay claim to very special place in Kieran's heart, a place that perhaps would never be filled by another. 

A brother, he had been. A best friend, perhaps something more.

He was a lost boy, that boy, the one who had hurt so much inside. That boy that Kieran had wanted so desperately to save. From the moment he saw him balancing on the edge, ready to fall and be consumed by the silence of death, something had hurt inside himself - like a wall crumbling after a moment of panic. Maybe that was why he had charged forward, risking himself to push that boy away from the danger, pushing him away from the option of suicide. Because a soul so broken should have the chance to live a better life, not give theirs away so soon when they had not even passed the age of a year. That boy should not have suffered so much internal hate, so much internal pain, a boy abandonded by the only parents he'd had. That boy, oh, that boy...

"I envy your optimism... I wished I had it. Still, as long as my remaining family is still here, and you're here, I guess things can't be that bad. I mean, you have my back, yeah? And I have yours."

"I will always have your back, Haw." He spoke to the stars as they shimmered and sparkled so far away, painting the dark canvas with sparks of light. Hawthorn, despite his darkness, was the light - of this, Kieran was certain. He thought back on the memories, not just of that day when they had made the promise, but of all the days they had spent side-by-side. "I'll be up there with you, one day, I promise." Another promise, another promise and one he would keep. His mind drifted, switching from the sad times to the happy in a blink of an eye, though it did not cure the sting that poked and prodded at his chest. 

"Wanna have a snowball fight?"

"A snowball fight?"

A sad smile graced his features, and for a moment his eyes closed just to savour the memory, the laugh that rumbled from that boy's chest as he attempted to throw a ball of snow at Kieran's head, only to give up and chase him instead. He remembered distinctly the rush of excitement as his paws raced along the ground, and the sudden shock of being pinned to the ground by Hawthorn. He remembered, so clearly, the boyish glimmer in his eyes and the smirk that adorned his face. The careless wink and the lick of his lip. And then the brilliant smile that followed as they spoke of growing older. "We were supposed to grow together. I wish I could have seen who you grew to be." 

"You don't have to say you're fine to me, if you're not fine. Pretend all you want with everyone else, but with me, you can be honest, all right? I'm here for you, remember?"

A tear rolled down his cheek, a tear shed for the loss of such a loved boy, whether he knew it or not. Despite what everyone else thought of Hawthorn, Kieran had seen him for who he really was and loved him endlessly for not giving up. Maybe he had, in the end, but at least he would be at peace finally. That was all the Streiter could ask for. And now, as he sat alone on the rise of the land where the view of the sky was clear, he spoke the truest words he could ever speak.

"I miss you."

It was a new development, Sorrel's newfound independence. Her breaks from Kieran and Sylvas didn't last long, but they marked an improvement from the unhealthy dependence she'd once had. Every once in a while, during her times alone, Sorrel would grow lonely and find herself longing for the presence of her brother, just as she had tonight. It didn't take long for her to track him down — his scent was (understandably) burned into her memory — but something was different about him.

Addy? she called out as she drew closer in complete submission; Sorrel's entire body was held as low to the ground as she could manage, from her ears to her belly to the dewclaws on the backs of her paws. Once she was near enough, she snaked around and reached under his chin to place affection licks along its length, soft whines sneaking through her maw. No sad, Addy, don't cry. Although she hadn't heard exactly what he'd been saying before she arrived, the heavy atmoshpere was almost palpable.

One day I'll see you again...

He was so consumed by the memories, the beautiful recollections of the boys' time together, that he did not notice the presence of his sister until she spoke his name. He froze, blinking his eyes in an attempt to hide the tears but it was to no avail for she had already noticed. His littermate was shuffling closer, body held close to the ground before placing gentle licks under his chin. He found himself grow more emotional at the gesture, but willed himself not to continue crying. Biting his lip, Kieran peered toward the stars and allowed a small sigh to fall from his lips. "I'm sorry, Sorrel." 

He leaned closer to her and placed a lick at her forehead before glancing down to meet her gaze. "It's okay, I'm okay. I won't cry." Tears had been shed, yes, but he'd stop now. He didn't want Sorrel to feel bad about it, that would only worsen the weight.

Kieran's attempt to straighten himself in Sorrel's presence didn't do much to quell her worrisome inquiries. There was obviously something wrong with Addy, and whether he wanted to tell her or not, she planned to pester him until he did. Dit-moi la problème, me parles, she insisted with a nudge to his shoulder.

There wasn't meant to be any secrecy between family members. If something was bothering Sorrel, she had long since learned that Kieran would always be there to listen. She wanted to give that back to him, that assurance, but she didn't know how if he wouldn't let her.

Hover for translations! <3

A soft smile crept up upon his maw at her perisistance, accompanied with the nudge to his shoulder. He supposed he should take an opportunity like this, just to talk. His sister was here, asking him what was wrong, who was he to turn her away? She was family, and he cared a great deal for her. Secrecy was not an act he wanted a part in. "C'est bon, d'accord," The boy glanced again at the stars, wishing Hawthorn was still here with him. Perhaps... perhaps he was still alive out there, somewhere. "Hawthorn me manque."

"I don't know if you remember him." He gave a sad smile, turning back to his sibling. Perhaps she had lost memory of him, that boy of dark shades and charming grin that rarely showed unless it was in the presence of Kieran. "Not having him here... it hurts."

It took a moment of hard thought for Sorrel to place the name. Le nom, ouais, she said, albeit a bit unsure. There was no face to be put to this Hawthorn, but somewhere in the back of her mind, a faint memory remained.

Sorrel bit at the inside of her cheek and quirked her lips with thought; she didn't want Addy to hurt, but she didn't know how to stop it. He's where? she asked, wondering if the two of them could fetch him together. The only issue was that there were so many places a wolf could be, Sorrel wasn't sure if finding him would be possible.

He perked his ginger ears forward when she spoke of recognising the name. It was clear she knew of no face, none that she could rise from any memories, but he was glad enough that the boy's name was known at the very least. "C'était mon meilleur ami." Kieran spoke, the words falling softly from his tongue - he had missed having someone to talk to in French. Even if this was a situation in which he felt an unbelievably painful sorrow in his chest from the very thought of it.

Her next inquiry made the sad smile grow again, gaze flicking to the horizon to watch the line where the land met the sky in darkness. It was barely visible, only thanks to the moon. "I don't know... that's the problem."

To navigate via the heavens was no easy feat, but it was one that Sorrel had been able to practice quite a bit. It was fair to say that she spoke the language of the stars better than that of her own kind; each night during her time away, they would whisper to her, and she would whisper back. All of that is to say that Sorrel saw no reason why she and Kieran couldn't find him, the same way they'd found one another. 

With another nudge to her brother, this one falling on his chest, she said with wide eyes, Find him? The unpredictable patterns of the winter would have made the entire thing much more difficult, so Sorrel understood if he refused, but she hoped he wouldn't. Even if staying within Morningside made her feel safer, there was no point in having that security if her beloved brother didn't share it.

The youth sat in silence, still gazing at the glowing dots in the inky sky before he felt another nudge at his chest. Peering down to meet his sibling's wide gaze, he blinked in surprise. The words were not immediately understood - find him? How would he find Hawthorn? He wasn't here, that was for sure. It took a moment to sink in what she meant, and when he finally realised, Kieran's own eyes were widened. "Find him? You mean..." Leave Morningside? Go out in to the wilderness and search for him?

He supposed... the idea had never crossed his mind. The majority of his life now had been spent within the confines of Morningside along these wolves who he trusted so greatly. To head out... the world still appeared a daunting place when he imagined it without the comfort of his father and the others who resided here. His uneasiness was not based on a lack of ability when it came to communication - he had no fear of approaching others to talk, but he worried for the safety of himself and his sister. Assuming she'd come along with him, that was. "You think... you think we could go? Explore? Search for Hawthorn... together?" Surely she did not mean he'd go on his own if that was the case? He couldn't imagine leaving her when they'd only just reunited.

It didn't matter much to Sorrel, whether or not they would ever be able to find Hawthorn, but it clearly mattered to Kieran which meant that she had to care by default. His questions came soft and steady, each to which she replied with an encouraging nod of her head. Mhm, she cooed, nuzzling up against him with an urgent nudge. Find him.

While it did seem a daunting task, leaving Morningside (and Pa and Da, for that matter), Sorrel had had her fair share of experience in the wandering department. They were two wolves with a complementary set of skills, so she didn't doubt that they would be fine on the road.