Silvertip Mountain Severed souls

I’m sorry cos I know we have a bajillion threads to keep up with already but I know we both agree they need this. :) We can put our other one on temporary standby if you want.


This was it. He had made up with Zaria, and now he had someone else to speak to. Although Mason had been involved in pack hunts (and the tasty aftermath) and not been absent, he had refuded to be anything more than cordially polite if Fitz asked him a question. It appeared that his Dad was letting him work his own way through this tough time, as thankfully he hadn’t been pressed into too much speech. Like a testy teenager he had taken to moping on his own both in the packlands and occasionally out of them. June was the only one who could pick him up out of his funk. 

But Mason had met Zaria yesterday, and he had patched her up as best as he could whilst she sewed a few stitches to start the healing of his broken heart. With the chasm between them closed (although his feelings had not particularly dimmed despite his best effords) he determined that he needed to speak with his Dad. He had a few things to tell him, a few bones to pick with him, and in general he just… wanted to talk to him, properly. After all, he was only a six-month old pup full of angst and fear at the changes taking place around him.

It was dark, with a crescent moon to light the way. Mason slipped through his home, more wary since Shardul, tracking his father. He presumed that he would be resting close to his new den. Mason headed in that direction. An owl hooted its displeasure as Mason sent a mouse scuttling back into its hole. He gave it an apologetic look and then carried on. It wasn’t long before he was nearing the Alphas’ den.

Mason slowed his movements until he was barely moving every time he took a step. Then his paws stopped, rooted to the ground. The coppery taste was back in his mouth and nerves bubbled along his veins. He stared at the entrance, some twenty feet from its mouth, wondering if @FitzDutiful and Zaria were twisted together in peaceful slumber. He hesitated, orange eyes fixed on the home he had extricated himself from. He only had himself to blame. He was at an impasse and he couldn’t move forwards.

It was time, no it was past time. FitzDutiful had let things spiral for too long and it was reaching the breaking point. If he didn't do something about this, and soon, he was going to loose his son for good. Just thinking about that lead him to the verge of heartbreak but he pulled himself back - it hadn't happened yet.

Picking himself up, he headed out into the night and saw Mason standing there. His tail wagged slowly, was his son coming home? Then it stopped, had he come to tell FitzDutiful that he was leaving the pack? Consciously he started it wagging again, in case Mason thought ill of his actions and approached cautiously; he didn't want Mason to bolt but he knew something was up; something more than he had expected, or so Steady had hinted.

"Mason," he said, his voice warm and yet it choked on the unshed tears. This was the first time they had really, truly seen each other since that fateful day. "Can we talk?" he asked as he got closer.

As though a magician had created an optical illusion, his Dad exited the den and stared directly in his direction. Eyes a duller shade of orange burned back at him. Bar the few extra blemished, it was like he was looking at a mirror image of himself in a few years’ time. Mason gulped in air as a heady silence lingered over the scene. He could see Fitz’s tail moving gently from side to side – a good sign. It appeared he was not going to hold any grudges.

Mason watched his father approach, his body slowly adopting a submissive posture through instinct alone. All of his thoughts were on how to get the words out of his mouth. What words would he choose? How could he explain this? Did he tell the whole truth and risk his Dad kicking him out for daring to think about Zaria in a non-friendly way? 

Too young to have real sexual desire, it was hard for Mason to really know what he did feel for Zaria. He merely knew that he thought as highly of her as he did his family, but in a different kind of way. It wasn’t real love, but it was as decent an imitation as his youth could allow. 

His father’s voice sounded cracked and hollow, like a large twig being stepped on by a giant bear. He knew he had hurt his father, and now that he had had time to think about his actions, this hurt almost as much as it did to know his father had hurt him. What a vicious circle, brought about by fate. “I-…” Mason breathed the words ever so softly, taking a hesitant step closer to show that he was intent on making amends, rather than expecting Fitz to come to him.a He stumbled over the words, a whine accompanying them without any attempt to quell it. 

He wished now he could take back all of his feelings. He would give almost anything not to feel this way. Unfortunately it didn’t seem to be as simple, and it was a hard thing for a 6 month old to wrestle with on his own. He resolved that he would have to tell his Dad the truth. Deep down in his heart he knew that he didn’t risk alienation – Fitz loved him too much to do that.

“I wish… I didn’t feel the way I feel.” Three-toned ears drooped miserably alongside his wide-set eyes, and he peered up at FitzDutiful like a whipped puppy. One socked paw slowly edged forwards to touch his father’s toes in supplication.

Mason didn't run away, it was something at least though FitzDutiful found he didn't feel the relief that he expected. Now they had to hash it out, sort it out. He hoped that he wasn't going to have to choose between his son and his mate for he didn't know which direction he would go. He knew it would have to be Mason but he wasn't sure he could do that; his inner demon thought that Mason could fend for himself, besides he didn't even know what was up with the idiotic boy!

Mason brought up the feelings and FitzDutiful sat. He wasn't going anywhere now, he wanted Mason to keep walking forward to show that he was willing to talk, but his words showed that even if his feet didn't. FitzDutiful felt it was so important to show Mason he wasn't going anywhere, he was going to be here for his son. If his son wanted him.

"What feelings are you talking about?" he pried, ever so gently. He was finding it difficult to avoid getting irritated and exasperated but his counsellor's skill let him control those emotions; even if he couldn't hold back the hurt. Everyone seemed to understand what was going on except for him. Zaria had told him he needed to talk about it with Mason, Steady had mentioned that Mason had told him what was wrong. He was sure June knew thought she would never tell him anything. Why was he the last to know? What could be so bad that no one would tell him what was wrong with his only son?!

It was good Mason couldn't read thoughts, because the thought of Fitz ever choosing a mate over a child would have possibly driven him to absolute madness. Even June didn't know what was wrong - really. It was hard for him to explain to her what love felt like. Had he known about her fixation with Alastor, he could have explained it was similar to that. But he simply explained he was upset his Dad had chosen Zaria - not the reason why. Steady was the only one who knew (although he thought Zaria had probably worked it out since their talk) and he had covered himself in gold-dust in Mason's eyes, because he had clearly kept his word.

Fitz sat down and Mason heaved a small sigh. He sat too, but he removed his paw which had gone relatively ignored, and shifted so he was near Fitz and facing him. Mason's orange eyes shimmered in the low moonlight. He directed them at his Dad's nose, not sure he should risk looking in his Alpha's own eyes at that moment. What feelings? That was simple enough; he had already resolved his Dad needed to know. Of course Mason would come first. "My feelings about Zari," he whispered loudly, his voice hoarse as he concentrated on the dim glimmer of his father's wet nose in the night.

FitzDutiful hadn't known what to do with the paw in his direction. He was so confused by what was going on that it made no sense to him why Mason had reached out like that. That had been part of the reason he had ignored it, they didn't need that sort of contact surely? It made it seem as though they were merely acquaintances; in fact this whole conversation felt like they didn't know each other. Mason told him that it was his feelings about Zaria but that just confused him all the more and his nose wrinkled up in confusion. He wanted to just yell at his son to spit it out, instead he felt like he was dancing to a tune that he didn't know. How could things have got so confusing; where had this gulf come from?

"I don't understand." he said simply, his voice trying to betray that he was trying to understand but failing; "You get on so well, I thought you liked her and would be happy that she was part of our family and in our lives. I was so scared that you'd think I was replacing your mother, that I betrayed you by finding someone to love — is that why you hate her?" For it must be that. He must hate Zaria and had secretly been hiding it, what else made sense?

FitzDutiful didn’t sound at all impressed by his son’s attempts at settling this matter. Mason was feeling more and more like an outcast. He had been bludgeoned and now he was in for another beating. 

His body convulsed involuntarily at the thought of hating Zaria. He could never, he didn’t think, no matter what she ever did. “I don’t hate Zari…” He breathed miserably. And, since his father had not accepted his contact, Mason took a step backwards. Away from the kind and doting father he had always previously known. “I like her.” Succinct, truthful, but from the edge to his tone it was clear he didn’t just mean ‘like’.

The hammer hit and the bludgeoning occurred, but not to Mason; to FitzDutiful. Shock temporarily captured his features before he wrestled control back from it. All of a sudden everything fell into place and began to make sense, he had seen every situation in a fatherly light and as scenes flicked before his eyes he saw them as someone infatuated, not a son's love for a mother figure. Hastily, he attempted to close the gap; falling still if Mason moved further away or nuzzling his son if he could get that close - he longed to get that close.

"I'm so sorry." he said, trying to assure Mason that he wasn't going to turn the boy out, he might not want to make a decision for fear of either outcome for he still hopes to see the best of both worlds. "I didn't know, please believe me I didn't know. I wouldn't have mated with her if I'd known, I just thought —" he faltered. "You got on so well that I thought you'd be pleased. Instead you must hate me." No promises of breaking up with her, he couldn't voice that for fear of Mason demanding it of him. His previous, almost clinical asseessment of whom he would choose was no longer so obvious. Though he doubted he could find any one else to be happy with and couldn't see a life without her, neither could he see a life without his son.

He'd wanted to tell Mason about a future litter, thinking he'd be excited about being a big brother. Now, well now he wondered if that would be a nail in a coffin that would send Mason on his way away from the pack.

Mason gasped in a dry sob as his Dad suddenly turned back into… Dad. He closed the distance and pressed his larger muzzle into Mason’s fur. The boy felt almost like his legs had turned to jelly and would wobble away beneath him. FitzDutiful offered words as soft as petals, confirming that he didn’t know and that he was sorry.

There was another blow – if he had had known, FitzDutiful wouldn’t have mated with her! Well, yet again his own stupidity appeared to have caused him the worst scenario.

Mason stood limply, as close to his Dad as he could get. It wasn’t an easy situation, and surely it would subside eventually. He wanted his Dad to be happy – he knew that now. How could he hate his Dad? Maybe he had thought it in those many self-serving moments of selfishness. But he never really felt it. This was the man who had put he and June above all else. He clearly expected that Zaria would add to their family, not detract from it.

“I don’t hate you Dad.” Mason’s voice wobbled like his legs. “I’m sorry I feel this way. I’ve been tryin’ not to, and it’s getting better.”  Easier day by day. Maybe one day he would laugh at this puppy love he had felt. “I love you Dad.” Mason said, and he reached up to lick his Dad’s cheek.

The walls that had built between them seem to crumble and in that instance, FitzDutiful felt as though the devil had nearly tried to control him and force his son away. Who, or what, had taken over his thoughts and said it would choose a female over blood without hesitation? He struggled to believe that the dark, twisted side of him existed. For now, at least, it was subdued and forced back into the tiny box it must have lived in before. They could find a way, Mason seemed determined to find a way to cope.

"You don't control these feelings, son, but if it's not returned they do fade though it will take a long, long time. Someone will feel the same for you and it will outshine anything you feel now. I promise you it will." Mason reached up to lick his cheek and FitzDutiful moved to accommodate him. "I love you too." he said wholeheartedly.

They would be okay.

Mason accepted that his father’s words contained wisdom that he could only strive to achieve. Similar to Steady, but perhaps more believable because Fitz was more world-wise and at a greater age. Both of them were adamant he would move on and that he would one day find someone who actually loved him back.

Mason seized his father’s promise and placed it deep in his heart, hoping the mend the wounds that lingered. In time, that promise would surely come true. Mason basked in the calm of his Dad’s words, accepting of his son in all his failures as any father would be. He snuggled up to that soft fur of his Dad’s neck, and allowed himself to nestle in the safety and comfort of a parent for the first time in weeks. He had missed this, and he wouldn’t let his feelings ruin this any longer.