Phoenix Maplewood Here I dreamt I was an architect

For @Scarlett. This takes place directly after http://wolf-rpg.com/showthread.php?tid=12022! Location powerplay and stuff, but we discussed that!

First, Pantaleimon's death and the incedent at the Sound— and now this. It seemed disaster needed company when the cougar decided to maul one of his pack mates close to the borders. It was as if some sort of cosmic cloud of grief followed Reek wherever he went; sparing himself, albeit barely, but wreaking havoc on the ones he loved. Her injuries were grievous, far outpacing the ones he had sustained in his fight with Caiaphas, and she needed medical attention as soon as possible. Thankfully, soon after he limped on to the scene, Scarlett regained consciousness and could be taken somewhere safe.

They both traveled through the Maplewood at a painfully slow pace with Reek limping in front. He had no official infirmary, nor did he have a bountiful cache of herbs. The winter hit him hard on that front. Of course, he was unprepared, but he did have one place to take her.

The den he shared with Saena was situated along a creek. It was a humble hole in the ground, barely big enough for two to share with any space between them, but it was home. He led her to the edge of the edge of the stream and dipped his forepaws in until he was ankle deep. "I haf to wath you Scarlett," he said. His lisp was still deeply pronounced from the injury to his mouth he sustained from his fight with Caiaphas.

Scarlett had taken quite a beating from the cat. Her wounds were severe and covering most of her body. If she would ever heal from this it would be a miracle. Scarlett had struggled even more with getting herself to the new location. It took all her will power to reach the spot where Reek wanted her. The small female trembled all over and sank to the ground as soon as they reached it. It was close to a stream. She realized she was thirsty but then see needed to reach out. It was Desna's pleading that motivated her. The mother couldn't leave her children behind. With all the pain in her body she drank a few sips from the stream.

She placed her head down on the bank, and looked at Reek when he spoke. Were her ears broken too? Why did he talk to strangely? Scarlett then saw the wound on his muzzle. They were all beaten up it seemed. Scarlett couldn't find the energy to talk. Her whole body hurt even while laying down. She didn't want to be too close to the stream, in Bearclaw it made her den flood and if she would be fully wet now she couldn't keep herself warm too. The female closed her eyes though her whole body was tense. Maybe she should tell Reek they could use her den, if he wanted that, but then she had to relocate again and she really didn't want that. With all the stress and panic she started crying, her breathing turned into a sobbing mess. These last months had been tough on her.

I just realized, this is my 100th thread!

The soft whimper of sobs tore Reek's attention away from the stream and cause him to turn, gaze falling upon Scarlett's bloody form.  Of course, she was allowed to cry— she had been through the wringer, but Reek wanted to do everything within his power to soothe her aching spirit.  Truthfully, Reek had never been one to empathize with others and healing tended to be an impersonal thing, but Scarlett was a strange case. She was family.

"Shhhhhhhhh," he whispered while drawing away from the water and limping toward his patient. He leaned in close and gently nudged her with the bridge of his nose. "I need to get you up Thcarlett," Reek said softly, but there was a nervous jitter behind his voice; an uncertain warble.  Her wounds were grievous and there was only so much he could do.  "We need to wath you... we don't want infection to thet in, do we?"

OMG yay! I have almost 1000 posts!

Scarlett nodded, which was barely seen. She really didn't want to get up but she realized she had to. Her tears were still flowing as she got up on her trembling legs. It were her hind legs that were the worst. She could barely put weight on them. Scarlett stepped aside and lost her balance, falling over into the stream. She spluttered up from she cold water, coughing. At least it brought her a bit more to her senses.

Her teared eyes glanced at Reek. Scarlett's ears hung down as she looked at him. "I-- I'm going to die Reek," she croaked, voice rough as she came from the realization. She had serval major injuries. It wasn't like she didn't have faith in Reek but she just had the gut wrenching feeling that she was not going to make it. Her spirit to fight was slowly dying out. Even though she wanted to be there for her children, how would she ever recover from this?

And you better make it for a thousand more!

Finally, she slowly made her way into the shallow stream and settled with a clumsy fall. Rushing to her side, Reek waited until she stabilized herself in the mellow current. Once still, Reek wasted no time and began the process of cleaning her wounds in the slow-running water. Teeth ran though fur and he made quick and delicate work with his tongue over her lacerations. Her recovery would be a slow one, he knew that, but he refused to let go of hope.

His ministrations came to a sullen halt after her sorrowful statement. His emotional wall was penetrated and he was overwhelmed with sadness. Death was simply not an option; not after losing Pantaleimon because of his own negligence, (of course there was nothing he could have done for him, but he blamed himself all the same). "No you're not," he said sternly. "You're not allowed to die. I won't let you." He would lose another friend... if he had to command her to live, then so be it.

Not so sure if that will happen with Scarlett...

The water was cold, and the water was slowly soaking her under fur too, meaning that her skin was getting cold. She trembled slightly, hoping that she was soon allowed to leave this stream. Reek was determined to safe her but it only made Scarlett wonder what kind of life she would after this. Her coat would never be as it was before. She would have scars if they would heal properly, maybe she would always be in pain. That was not the type of life she wanted. She had been a mother, her kids were close to being adults. She hated that she was thinking so negatively but lately she couldn't stop. It was always the negative thoughts that consumed her and not the positive ones she had before.

Her willpower to be positive was just vaporized by all the drama that happened to her. The pale female glanced at Reek. She wanted to res there head but couldn't because she was in the stream. "Sometimes those things aren't for you to decide, is it?," she returned quietly. "I.. I'm so tired, Reek. Life had never been kind to me. I don't know how I will live on after this. Sure I have my kids and the pack but... I just.. my mind is troubled," she admitted. This was the first time she actually admitted to another wolf about her mental illness. Did she have one? Yes, she realized that she might have a bit of a depression...

After a short while, the washing of her wounds drew to a close and the movement of Reek's tongue ceased. The faster he could get her out of the water, the better, because the creek's chill had already sank into Reek's very bones. He couldn't even imagine how the injured Scarlett  must have felt. Now that her wounds were clean, it was time to make and apply an anti-microbial salve, but first he would need to move her across the short distance to his den. He offered his body as support to help her walk.

Of course, Reek couldn't choose Scarlett's fate. As much as he wanted to play God, it didn't mean he could walk the walk and command her to heal.  "You know, Thcarlett," he began as he waited to feel her weight press against him, "life ith hard. I get that, but you haf a family now. A real family. Not jutht your kidths, but all of uth, and we all care about you."  

"You haf to realithe, it ithn't about you, it'th about who you leave behind. The one'ths you love. The one'ths who love you."  If Reek had gleamed one lesson from his stint in the Teekon Wilds, it was that living for someone else could be far more fulfilling than oneself. A far cry from his initial selfish existence.

Scarlett felt a bit guilty for wanting to give up. The thing was that she fought all her life and she never had been that happy afterwards. Something else was ruining it, and now it were here negative thoughts. She was glad when she was helped out of the water. She leaned quite heavily against Reek, luckily Scarlett wasn't that big. It soothed her that Reek was mentioning that this was her family, it was the first pack that ever called her part of the family. She was almost a bit choked up about it.

The female sank down when she was allowed to, her body trembling under her efforts. She was glad to be in the hands of Reek. He was a skilled healer and if he hadn't been around she had a zero chance to survive. The red eyed woman glanced at the alpha, looking guilty for thinking the way she did. She didn't have any words how to respond to what he was saying. If she would die she would leave loved ones, her kids, this pack. It was though to swallow. Yet, there were still these selfish thoughts of how she was going to give with these wounds if they would ever heal. They were very prone for infections, even after cleaning. "I'm sorry," she whispered very quietly.

Getting his patient back to the den was difficult work. She pressed against him and their damp fur intertwined. He nearly wobbled from the added weight, but his footing remained firm. Despite her dainty size, providing support proved to be a difficult task because of his own injuries. But together, they limped onward towards his dry chambers. She settled to the dusty floor almost immediately and apologized. Her apology caught Reek off guard; he cocked a brow and slowly settled beside her.

"You don' haf to apolgithe," he murmured. "I want you to be honetht with me about what you're feeling. You shouldn't apologithe for what you feel." Communication was what made a strong pack, not just the able bodies. He felt there already was a level of openness between the two. In fact, with the loss of Pantaleimon, Scarlett was the closest thing he had to a friend nowadays (barring Saena, of course).  There was no way he would let her slip though his paws too. "You can alwayth talk to me Thcarlett."

Scarlett looked at her paws before resting her head on them. She still felt bad for what she said, even though it had been the truth of what she had been thinking. Guilty thoughts. Reek said that he wanted to know about them, that she could always tell him, but she wasn't so sure if she could. Her guilt might become too big. Still it was nice to know that she could always talk to the healer if she needed someone. Maybe that was a good start. Poor Reek and his lips. She didn't even know what happened to him.

"I .. I feel beaten and tired," she then admitted. "You don't sound okay either," she added quietly. Her head still resting on her paws. Scarlett wished she could help him back as he was helping her now. But moving a muscle hurt. Even her shallow breathing caused slight pains. All the pain was close to numbing her down. "I'm here to listen too," she spoke to Reek in return, if he wanted to talk about something.

Though he sat beside her, Reek didn't allow himself to linger for too long.  A balm was to be made for her wounds as so they could stave off the deadly grip of infection. He roused himself from his position at her side and crawled to the opposite end of the den, where he kept his meager herb cache. There was little to work with, but Reek was immediately drawn to a wild onion he had harvested a few days prior.  

He took it in his mouth and chewed, the foul taste nearly overpowered him. Tears welled in his eyes, but once the onion was little more than a chunky paste consisting of mostly dirt and saliva, he dressed her wounds with his tongue.

"Tha'ths becauthe I'm not ok," he said, spitting the remaining onion paste from his mouth.  "I watched my bethst friend die the other day.  I won't lose you too."

Scarlett closed her eyes as she kept her ears open to listen what Reek was doing. The small female noticed that he was getting up and chewing on something. It didn't take long for the strong scent to go up her nose. Scarlett sneezed, the wound by her shoulders and neck hurting instantly. She opened her eyes to see Reek chew on a paste that was probably for her wounds, she wondered what he was chewing on.

It didn't take long before she laid her head down again. "Oh Reek. I'm sorry to hear that," she spoke in return. "My condolences. May I ask how he died?," she wondered. Maybe he had an infection too, or was it something worse, like being murdered. She huffed softly as Reek licked over her wounds. It wasn't the most pleasant feeling but if it would help her survive she wouldn't complain. Her body was mostly too tired to complain.

Now that her wounds were fully dressed, Reek could allow himself a bit of relaxation alongside his patient. He settled close, allowing a certain level of contact between their two bodies. However, this was only due to the confined quarters of Reek's den. Of course, he felt a fair amount of closeness with Scarlett, but his heart only truly belonged to one other wolf, his mate. But even then, the contact and closeness was nice, especially after feeling so down.

He sighed and prepared himself to recount the events of the terrible day that claimed Pantaleimon's life. "It was thome sort of thickneth," he began. "I couldn't tell what exactly it wath, but the fever jutht burnt him out." His gaze suddenly turned downward with shame. Shame that he couldn't help when his best friend needed it most. "It happened tho fathst."

Once Reek settled next to her Scarlett moved her muzzle closer to his. She gave him a lick as a thank you and for comfort. There was nothing romantic about it, just to show him that she was there for him like he was there for her now. The lifting of her head hurt so she quickly placed it down again. "I'm sorry to hear that Reek. No one should have to see that," she whispered.

Scarlett's ears fell back. She had to survive this! She had to! She couldn't leave her family behind. All the misfortune that was happening. That cat should never have grabbed her, now Reek was injured, she was injured and Saena looked injured too. How were they going to survive? She had seen Ukko with another wolf, but did that mean that they had to hunt with only two wolves? That would be bad. Maybe Reek could help, he was still good on his feet. "But if it was a sickness then maybe it is better he can rest now, without pain."

He tried to smile. Of course, he felt like he should after accepting her expression of gratitude, but the corners of his mouth barely mustered a subtle twist. An exhausted sigh passed his lips and Reek allowed his body to go limp as he laid himself further into Scarlett's side. While her condolences wouldn't bring Pantaleimon back from the dead, Reek was grateful for the compassion that she showed him. A little bit of warmth went a long way.

Her suggestion that Pantleimon's suffering had finally ended calmed Reek's aching heart, but the guilt he felt did not diminish. "But, if I would'a gotten there thooner, I could have helped him." If he could have treated the fever before his poor soul burnt out, perhaps his friend would still be around. The weight of this thought threatened to crush Reek with guilt.

Scarlett shook her head lightly when Reek spoke about being there sooner. Maybe he could have saved him, yes. But that didn't mean that it was the best thing. Scarlett thought that most things happen for a reason, even though that belief was slowly fading with all that happened to her. "No, Reek. You shouldn't think like that. Maybe if you were there sooner, you would think it was your fault that he eventually died too. Everyone has their way of being out of life, and sometimes you can't stop that. Maybe if you prevented it, your friend would maybe have died of something else when you weren't around," she spoke.

Scarlett swallowed thickly, feeling like she was at the end of her life too. She had said it before to Reek but now she kept quiet. "It is like saying, if you came with me finding herbs and plants that cougar might not have attacked. You can't be everywhere at once," she urged softly, feeling more and more tired. But she wanted Reek to know that sometimes there was no way that certain events could be prevented.

Wanna fade this out? I'm gonna go on absence for a while starting Tuesday because of a trip, and I'd like to finish this up beforehand! I hope to have a new thread with you when I get back!

Despite some of the things Reek liked to believe, he was no superhero.  As much as he wanted to be one, he had no power; he could not split in two (well, maybe once... but there would definitely be no coming back from that), he could not save the world, and most of all, he could not be God... no matter how hard he tried. There was a futility to life, and Reek felt small. Smaller now than he had ever felt.  Perhaps Scarlett was right; maybe there was no use fighting the natural course of events. He could embrace the life of a passenger. A speck of dust, settled on a rock, floating through space.  

Silence filled the den and Reek felt a heavy weight in the pit of his stomach.  He did not speak. He felt as if he no longer had words left in him. Placing his head in the juncture between Scarlett's neck and shoulder, Reek sighed and closed his eyes. A sadness overwhelmed him.

Yes! Definitely seems like a right way to end it here! Hopefully we can still have a thread when you get back <3

It stayed quiet in the den. Scarlett took this as a time that she needed to rest. She hoped she hadn't said the right thinks to Reek, she had a knack for doing the wrong things after all. Most wolves always had comment son her behavior. It was probably something she would never learn. She rested her head back on her paws, whining softly in pain. With that she closed her eyes and decided to just rest, that was most important right now.