The Sunspire Fear of living and loving what's that called again?

Nerian ran and ran and ran. She bolted past the border of her pack and ran. She didn't know where she was going or what she passed by. Her frantic flee eventually turned into a graceful mile eating lope.
Soon the ground inclined enough that she had no choice to stop, her legs shook and her chest gasped for air long denied it. It was only then she had realized she had passed into a pack land, here on a mountain? A pack? that didn't seem like a good long term plan...

Nerian slumped down and rested, her tongue lolling out of the side of her mouth as she panted. Once she gained her breath and rested a little she'd retreat until then she hoped that she'd either not be noticed or at the very least not attacked. She was a small slender wolf and not one that could hold her own against a brutish Mackenzie Valley Wolf, and she scented lots of those near here.

As time passed her gaze turned toward the plants she began taking measure of the herbs and useful plants there were some things here she'd have to ask permission to take home some of these did not grow in Stavanger Bay. At least not yet.

Jace strode down the mountain side his limp barely there now as time moved on. It had been a couple weeks and he was almost healed. There were still days that he ached, and there was still times he could not exert himself too much without causing some serious issues, but otherwise he was good. He smelled the sea, he continued on and came upon a petite she wolf and gave one warning growl.

He stalked near her standing heads and shoulders above her, and probably well over 60 pounds heavier, his was all muscle though and he stood looking at her his posture threatening, but he didn't attack her not yet, she was so tiny he didn't want to hurt her and spoke quietly If i were you i'd take that tiny body over that border line this instant before I help you across it. His frosty blue eyes were narrowed and his breath came out of his maw with a huff. She smelled like the sea not the creek, and she clearly had been running, away from something perhaps.

Nerian swallowed a yelp as the big dark male came up upon her, She got her paws up under her but did not stand, she did scoot backwards. She tried to look over her shoulder to where she was going but not look away from him.

Nerian backed into a tree and backed herself into a sitting position curling her tail under her, it was the first time since Odin's Cove was she afraid she'd be attacked. sorry, sorry, She pleaded I was running, I lost track of where I was, I was to tired to even scent the border I must have past. She lowered her muzzle toward the ground protecting her neck while appearing as submissive as she could. The cross upon her face picking up the sun seeming to glimmer I was hoping to ask for permission to take some plants, I noticed here that are not growing by Stavanger Bay Nerian winced and waited hoping she could hear his reply over her madly beating heart.

Jace raised a brow, as he watched her virtually back herself into the tree, and he swallowed a laugh. Now, was not the appropriate time to laugh at the poor girl. She was obviously scared to death.

Jace shook his head and spoke softly still Gods go ahead and stand up. I'm not going to attack you, you're no bigger than a minute, that would not be a fair fight. Up you get. Let's start this again, okay, now that you are away from my borders, though you could be further. I am Jace, This is the sunspire. he pricked his ears forward letting her speak her name if she wished, but he kept his maw shut and then on a second thought he sat down a grimace moving across his maw for a second when he over extending the sore leg.

Jace stared at her with surprise on his face, first she crossed his borders and now she wanted his plants, what the hell. He couldn't just be offering the herbs all willy nilly to anyone. First what were you running from. I don't take lightly to any males forcing themselves at a woman if that's what it was, i'll gladly take care of that for you if that is the case. Secondly, tell me this why should i let you have my plants? when you trespassed? even if it was not meant to happen?

damn it you keep distracting me from Ragnar and Thistle :D :D :D

Nerian sighed and relaxed then curled her body out from the tree and stood, backing up a few more paces for good measure.

He gave her his name and so she returned the favor pausing in her words to assess his expression then then quickly his body I am ... Nerian

Her eyes flowed over his body but she was not appreciating his masculine form indeed she did not see that at all, she looked for wound or injuries are any reason that lead to his pained expression. Her eyes flicked back and forth for a moment as she replayed the initial encounter in her head, was there a limp? she wasn't sure....

Nerian frowned, he offered her protection and in the same sentence repudiation. um.. well I was not running from a male per say. She doubted when the time came any wolf could protect her from the fate she had willingly signed up for and yet didn't want. But.... the plants in exchange for them I could help you. Nerain tipped her head just slightly hoping he would indulge her with information on his wound. Any distraction from what she had been running from was a welcome one.

*sorry my charries tend to be distracting lol*

Jace dipped his muzzle, well met Nerian Jace didn't notice physicalities most of the time either, just cause he preferred to know another on a more intuitive level.

he watched as she looked for wounds and he spoke softly you will see naught but scars I'm afraid no seeping wounds do I bear The outward wounds had long since healed, the only one now was deep in his chest and leg.

Jace shook his head there's no help you can give me the wounds inside. but you can take what you will, but leave enough for our healers and don't tresspass anymore. I Wont be able to be kind next time. he was probably too kind this time around, but well she had been running scared, and the obsidian dark angel had a weakness for females being raise by a wonderful mom with a perfect sister.

Nerian frowned, he lied, or perhaps he just didn't know, he had no idea how much knowledge she held. If there is no outward wound then I bet you have bone bruising or tendon injury. Those can still be tended if you let me. An Arinca Poultice would work and I saw what I believe was Turmeric plants, they are the plant with a large green leaf that has a dark purple stripe down the middle, If you eat a single paw pad sized amount of it's root each day it will serve you well Turmeric has a peppery, warm and bitter flavor but it'll help your body stop the inflammation on the inside and help rebuild your joints It'll also alleviate the pain and discomfort you feel without any chance you being addicted but you could with Poppy seeds
She huffed, that was a mouthful to say, she hated being to talkative but she also wanted to prove to this wolf for some reason that she was worth something.

Jace saw her frown and was momentarily confused at it. He hadn't meant to upset her, as far as he knew you couldn't heal anything on the inside, proof that he was no healer. His sister would probably know what to do about it, but he had all but refused most help with his chest wound preferring to just take it easy and soak it, and that was working perfectly fine, slow but fine.

Jace raised a brow, his smile curving into a boyish grin crooked and endearing, as was usual for him. Very well Nerian where's this plant you want me to eat? And my sister might kill me for letting you, but by all means you can make one poultice before you go if you must. I have a feeling you don't like to take without giving am I right? He then sat still not moving, just listening and waiting.

A poultice takes time to make, I could show your sister if you would let me or any other healers in your pack. It is a very useful thing as long as there are no open wounds it draws out the swelling and the toxins or 'bad things' that maybe in your muscles or blood. Truth be told she'd need a few days to dry the arnica but she was not looking to go home anytime soon, so finding shelter in another Pack would be nothing more then divine intervention.

When Jace spoke of taking without giving her heart broke, tears lashed the back of her eyes and she turned her head away abruptly. Nerian took without giving, poor Thistle Cloud there was a wolf whom gave and gave and took nothing in return. Nerian had taken much and given very little and here she was doing it yet again. Taking time from Thistle and the rest of the Pack only the fact she happened upon some useful plants was her saving grace

Nerian washed her face with a neutral expression, her emotional blockade before looking at Jace again not more tears no sorrow no fear no happiness. Sorry I thought I saw a Turmeric plant over there but no. They were however growing in a sheltered spot under the stone ledge behind you. They like warmth. I could show you if you want. I'll dig up one when I leave so that I can get it home quickly but you should eat some root now Nerian thought of the best place to grow it, Thistle showed her a great spot yesterday by a lavender patch, a natural wind break, but if it didn't survive they would still be here so she decided she would only take one

Jace listened and tilted his head blue eyes on the femme in front of him. You can show me and I can show them if you like. I'm pretty quick learner. and I know enough about herbs to save my life so. He grew quiet again, he was learning all the time and he didn't mind knowing a little more about healing.

Jace saw her face momentarily fall before she turned away and he tsked in his deep voice. you know holding whatever pain that is deep inside like that it will eat you alive. Then he grew quiet he didn't expect her to answer him, didn't expect her to tell him anything, he was just giving her fair warning of what would come if she didn't talk to someone soon.

Jace shifted and nodded yes show me please, That was all he wasn't expecting to move and he wouldn't have to so she wouldn't know he hurt unless he let her know.

I'm going to add in info Nerian would not have known if it was not for Kris

Nerian nodded to him and moved back into the pack land keeping her head low and respectful. Even with her nearly crouching form she still managed a graceful gait. She found the plant she had thought she had seen and sniffed it's leaves. yes this is the one, it's root might look like ginger but I can assure it, it's not.

Nerian adeptly dug and partially exposed the root, she reached into her hole and bit the root pulled off a human thumb side chunk but to a wolf it was just a paw pad size. Carefully Nerian reburied the root and returned to Jace with the portion of Termeric.

You can eat this twice a day morning and night, but try once a day for now. I'm sure with this and the hot springs we will have you right as rain in no time. You have been to the hot springs I assume. you smell of sulfur

Neiran looked down avoiding eye contact The poultice is harder to make then most. you need tools and patience, a flat rock and a round rock for crushing the dried Arnica flowers.

Neiran sighed and shook her head looking rather defeated she poured her heart out to a soul she hardly knew. Jace I am so torn up and so deep in there is no beginning nor end to my mortal and immortal .... I don't know what this is, Torment?Pain?Suffering?Love?Freedom?reward.....?

Jace waited patiently and just watched. He didn't know one plant from the other, though he knew what Yarrow was and cobwebs and some few other things, but nothing major. He being the way he was did not even notice the graceful gait of the femme in front of him. He supposed other's would, but that sort of thing just didn't appeal to him on any level, he was a male yes, but he was also a bit more of a deeper thinker than most.

Jace bent down and ate the small bit of herb. He grimaced at the taste. Gods that's nasty. He shook his head like a bull shaking a fly and then nodded. yes i was there it helps nicely.

Jace listened and looked at her with deep blues Whoa there you need to start from the beginning? Why are you torn? And why do you think whatever it is is love or torment? Could it be everything, I don't know about you, but i know love has had me turned upside down and sideways so you know.

Nerian looked guilty as if she had somehow made the root bitter herself but that was not the case, she could no more change the taste of the root then she could stop the rain from falling. The root will help your internal injuries more then you know, keep at it

Nerian closed her eyes, I'm sorry Jace, I have barely met you and yet I long to dump my problems out on you and that's not fair. I carry my problems with me where ever I go it's up to me to sort them out in the end. She reopened her eyes but here goes, perhaps if I speak them aloud I will be able to sort through them better... Most of my problems are in my changing beliefs part of me wants to believe in something different, something more and part of me wants to believe the things I've always believed and are bound by. I took a mate a Husband something I vowed not to do, and My husbands other Wife she didn't want to share him in the first place, so I feel I have wronged her and my husband wants me to wrong my Sister wife again by having his pups first before she. Nerain froze there unable to say aloud what truly was bothering her... for most of that she was ready getting over it was the pups that drove her to the edge of sanity.

Jace grimaced at the thought of having to eat more of the bitter tasting thing, but he nodded. He would do what he needed to do to keep himself healthy. I will do that. I have to stay alive for the pack, they need me, just as i need them.

Jace shrugged and gave her a boyish grin, It's okay i don't mind. he grew quiet as he listened and he wavered between absolute disbelief and disgust. He strongly suspected that the man in question didn't love his first wife or he wouldn't have wronged her so. That is how he saw it anyway, but he was raised that a man only took one mate and he loved her with every fiber of his being. He only had his parents to measure mateship, so he could be wrong. Despite his thoughts and opinions, he kept his face neutral and his thoughts to himself. Well look at it this way. We change and grow all our lives our opinions, our thoughts our bodies. Everything grows and changes, so why couldn't your beliefs, because after all you're not turning your back on your beliefs just broadening them is all. As for the oath, some oaths are made to be broken, it's that simple. Sometimes you have to break them for self preservation.

He frowned at the pups and didn't know what to say. I don't know what to tell you about the pups. Do you want pups? I mean do you want them? or just your husband? Because if you don't want them he should take your opinions into light, but if you do just talk to you sister wife maybe? Perhaps she'll not say anything, she let him take a second wife even though it sounds like she didn't want too, so she'll probably let you have kids too. If she is okay with it are you really wronging her?

Nerian frowned and looked in Jace's eyes not in a challenging manner but in a rather pleaful one. Suddenly she saw Ragnar's and closed her and turned her head away. Two wrongs don't make a right Nerian felt worse now. I thought I wanted pups, but now I think that was my heat making me want them.

I want my husband to be happy, with every fibre of my physical body. He wants pups so badly and pups that there is no chance of being another males. I thought I wanted pups but I don't think I do, I'm afraid of pups... There she said it... Nerian's body began to tremble her legs shook, she felt despair and the last thing she wanted to hear was that pups of her own would be different, because from the bottom of her heart she didn't think so. In fact now that she said it out loud she wanted to run again and keep running. disappear, cease to exist. that'd almost be nice right now...

Nerian sighed and lay down curling herself into a ball squeezing her eyes shut tight. Willing Jace to just leave, but in the little time that she knew him, that was going to be unlikely.

Jace shook his head I don't understand How is it wrong if she said it was okay? That doesn't make it wrong. Yea maybe she didn't want to share, but she did. She gave the okay so then it's right, right? He was probably confusing her, but her emotions confused him. He had never been that conflicted, at least that he could recall anyway. Wait did this other female cheat on him is that why he got a second wife and such? Cause that is not cool. yea i've heard heat season makes everyone crazy.

Jace nudged her should and then backed off Hey look I know no matter what I say it's not going to matter. But you know something I really think you need to talk to your husband. You need to tell him, that you don't want any if you really don't, and don't let him talk you into anything you don't want, cause then you'll start to resent him and them. So, I would talk to him and your sister wife talk to her too. It was not his place to judge the first wife, but if she cheated on the husband he would have got rid of her quickly.

Nerian lifted her head a little, she liked this wolf, he told her something different then the others, not that it would help in the long run.
She was not brave enough to talk to Ragnar and she doubted Ragnar would listen anyway and when she was in heat her body was going to do the same thing it did before, make her desire what she didn't want.

Nerian pulled herself to her feet though she still felt weak. She would not allow another wolf to think ill of the angel that was 'her' Thistle Cloud. No! they were married shortly after that, while she was still in heat, all of the pups might be his, there really isn't anyway to tell.
Nerian tilted her head upwards a bit, she wanted to appear haughty Perhaps it was that that made them realize that they did hold the love for each other. But I was not around when they were first married so I can not conjecture about it Nerian dropped her haughty attitude and thought over Jace's words.

You have given me much to think about Jace, I do appreciate all you have said and I will take it to my heart as best I can. I would very much like to meet your sister and teach her about my poultice's if you wish she could meet me in Stavanger bay. but if you'll allow it I'll quickly collect what I need and be on my way if you don't mind. Once I pull the plants from the ground they will need to be re-planted post haste.

Nerian lowered her head in a bow to him. Nerian melted all emotion from her face and forced her neutral visage to the front, she couldn't allow any of her thoughts to be picked up on. Jace was so different from Ragnar but his eyes they appealed to her. She fought the desire to look at him for the male specimen he was. She didn't need to know how handsome he was or how sensible he seemed, he was perfect goddamit. She needed to get space from him, Suddenly the air felt thick to her, hard to breathe it was now she finally understood why and how it had happened to Thistle.

Nerain kept her head low as she forced her mind to take inventory of the plants she saw. pushing all other thoughts from her mind with the practiced skill she used in meditation. Finally meditation had actually became of use to her.

Jace thought about what she said and he spoke again quietly Do you think your sister wife could stand up to him on your behalf if you can't? She didn't say anything about being to weak or what have you to stand against her husband. But from her reaction and the way she curled up he imagined she wouldn't be able to tell him to bug off.

Jace narrowed his eyes and half itched to say well if he had loved her as much as Nerian thought, why did he take a second wife, but he kept his opinions to himself. Because who was he to make decisions. He was still very young, for all he knew you could love more than one wolf at a time. And besides that he did not wish to be cruel, simply because she had acted haughty. So all he said was Ah I see and perhaps that is what made them see. He said no more about them, he did grin though and mention this sister wife. So you get along with the sister wife, huh. Well that's good.

Jace dipped his muzzle I'll send her on the way then. Do you need an escort back? I can take you or I can send one of our other wolves along with you?

When Jace made the comment that she got along with Thistle she chuckled just a bit and slightly nervously, she averted her gaze. We wanted to get along with Thistle but she still had it in her head that Thistle hated her and maybe Thistle hated the idea of nerian but one on one they seemed to get-along just fine.
If only she could find a way.... no she had to put those thought's aside she couldn't loose everything now. Nor would she ever ask Thistle to stand up on her behalf because Thistle would and that might cause more strife between them. Nerian felt to much guilt as it was.

The thought just traveling across the teekon wilds with a male, and not just any male but this handsome one, nearly made her blush, in reality though becuase the extra push of emotions she felt Nerian was finally able to reign in her emotions and got her neutral facade back on.
Lifting her soft veiled gaze to Jace's face but not his eyes, she nodded respectfully.

You have done much more then I could have hoped to find in a stranger halfway across the wilds, I think I will collect my plants and make a leisurely trip home. I will be fine without an escort, there is nothing in these wilds that could compare to what I have already faced. You are a very kind soul, and I do hope our paths will cross again.

Nerian stood and shifted making sure to pass the marked boarders of The Sunspire Pack, she'd hang out near here for a few more days noting the plants she was going to scavenge and return home with and this time she would also bring home her gift for she Sister Wife, no excuses.