Honeyed Pasture That's it Sir, you're leaving

@Rowan Mayfair

After departing from Asterr, Hiram found himself free from the haze of desire. With the fog lifted from his senses, his sin was realized. He did not love his new acquaintance; not like Vuk, or even Jhala. His actions had been impure, clouded by nothing more than simple lust. He had spent his time preparing a second cleansing, gathering supplies to begin the ritual alone. He returned to the coast and dug his own circle on the top of a cliff without the aid of any other. Running through the same steps of his initial cleaning -- this time, without the seer to guide him -- Hiram prayed for forgiveness and remained in his circle of protection until the morning sun came: bringing with it the purifying light of Raas.

With the state of his soul renewed, the Cardinal began to work his way south, resuming the search for his children. Each step, putting distance between himself and his sin. He walked until his legs were sore and the evening sun touched the horizon. He found himself in a meadow that stretched for miles, much unlike the harsh, rocky ground of the north that he was used to. He slowed, feeling the sharp pang of hunger flare within his breast.

Attempts to find friends had been soured, the woman's stomach more round and growing steadily daily - her own issues with it. Stopping to urinate what felt like every three steps, stilling herself to listen not only to the pale figment at her side but to the whispered voices she heard: the woman made slow progress. She had to get out of the pack's borders. She had to get away from Aria's unwarranted hatred. She had done nothing out of spite; instead out of instinct, of a blooming affection. How was she to know that tragedy would strike so soon?

This brought up a wave of unwanted emotion in her, the lithe woman's body freezing on the spot as she stopped and willed the emotions away. Being a blank slate, submitting to nothing but her own choices, that was safer. Thinking of Lasher, thinking of the Taltos - it only made her hurt and ache. She had not had the courage to come to his children and tell them the truth; not after speaking with Aria. 

She expected anger from them too, maybe to felt robbed of something. It sapped her good spirits, leaving her a bit jaded and guarded. So she left the forest and set out for the broad fields, looking for a reprieve from the suffocating feelings and memories. The sun was setting and her slow progress had presented her with a haven. She could bed down and sleep beneath the stars - most likely the spirit would cling to her, and she swore that she felt his touch, knew his presence. It was comforting. 

Beyond her, a dark figure moved, and her eyes narrowed for a moment as she tried to make it out - she could not, not clearly, but the pale woman did not recoil in fear. That had been willed away too. 

With the sun setting on the horizon, there was no longer any time to proceed -- nor time to hunt. The cover of darkness would soon envelope the meadow, shielding all the critters from Hiram's hungry grasp. He snorted with displeasure, knowing that it was his own tunnel vision and determination that deprived him of a proper meal. With a frustrated shake of his head, he decided he could hunt in the morning.

His eyes trailed across the meadow, searching for a place to ride out the night, but his eyes fell upon a wolf. She stood, still as a statue in the dying light. His brow furrowed slightly, confused as to why she stood (seemingly without purpose). Chuffing to grab her attention, Hiram was intent on breaking her spell.

Her thoughts had drifted away again - if she strained had enough she could almost hear distinct voices, almost garner visions and details of them. She did not know their ways like she knew Lasher's, and so it was a futile attempt at getting the information she so desperately needed. A sound drew her from her focus - or lack of - and the pale woman turned to face the male who had presumably made the sound. 

She dipped her head in greeting, taking only a couple more steps closer to him. Her silver eyes could  see him more clearly, skinny, clearly overworked by the famine that had hurt them all. Finally mustering up the strength, or perhaps the will, she lifted her head and spoke. "Hello," She didn't know him, and the few tendril of information on his scent didn't give her much to go off. With a dull horror she realized how much time she had spent in her pack lands and how little she knew of anything else around her.

It was foolish, now, and her children would suffer for it. 

She spoke, drawing closer. Hiram took a few steps forward, tail wagging as he approached in a friendly manner. From what he could see, her expression was all too familiar. It was one wrought of grief and loss. Strangely, he could feel a shared sense with the woman, as her expression was one he had worn before. It was like looking into a mirror into his past self.

"You OK?" He asked, genuine concern evident in his tone. Perhaps he could help her. The light of Raas could heal all wounds. He could forgive all sins. If she was broken, the Lord could fix her.

Rowan didn't mind his approach, her nature a little more cautious with the children growing inside of her. She licked her lips in a slight show of anxiety when he asked if she was okay - well, no, she was the furthest from okay that you could be, but, she couldn't very well tell a stranger of her life. "I have a lot on my mind." She admitted. It was near overwhelming, and maybe had Lasher not perished it would have been easier. She didn't expect to be his mate, but, she did at least feel she would have more support in this. 

"What brings you out tonight?" She asked, curious about the male's reasons - no one who was happy with their lives at home spent a night out alone after all.

As Hiram drew closer, he noticed the subtle curve of the stranger's belly. It was slight, but otherwise, a window into her troubles. She was expecting -- possibly, as he could only assume. If the prospect of parenthood didn't weigh heavy on the mind, he didn't know what would. "Welcome to the club," spoke the man as he tried to smile. He had enough of his plate as well and could empathize.

"I'm, uh—" his voice trailed off as he wondered if he could be completely candid with the stranger. He soon decided that there was no harm in telling the truth. "I'm looking for my kids. I hear they're in the southwest. You haven't seen a tailless white wolf with copper ears and eye patches have you?" If she had ever known Saena, she would surely know who he was describing. Hiram had seen no other wolf like her, nor would he ever.

A club. Rowan did offer a small smile to that, nodding her head. Of course they wouldn't be alone in their thoughts, there was no way that she expected things to be that way. She chewed the corner of her lip for a second as she looked the lanky male. He was looking for his children, which was enough to bring anyone's concerns up. She frowned as he asked after a strangely colored female - one the likes of which Rowan had never seen. "Unfortunately, no." She lamented. "How old are the cubs?" She asked.

Although there was only a few weeks into her pregnancy - she still had a month at least -  Rowan still couldn't fathom her children being lost to her. "Did you get separated from your mate?" She asked curiously. The famine had finished, perhaps they'd been out exploring and gotten caught in one of the storms. A million possibilities ran through her head, but, none were close to the truth. 

His inquiry was worth the chance, but unfortunately, it came up completely empty. He sighed and shook his head. "It's fine," he muttered. Despite his dissapointment, all he could do was place his faith in the Lord. Raas would lead him to his children -- Hiram would not need the guidance of strangers when he followed the light of God. "They should be around three and half to four months old now," answered the man wistfully. He had missed so much time. Even if he could coax his children back to the grotto, there was no way to get back what he had lost.

Her question was simple in it's assumption... and technically, it was correct. She did not need to know the bitter details that made up the truth. "We were seperated before they were born. They—" he paused, nearly choking on his words. "They don't even know who I am."

They had been apart for a long time then, if the children were so old. Rowan nodded, looking the male over as he spoke. "I'm Rowan." She finally offered, realizing that they had not even exchanged names in their brief talk. "If you find them, you won't have missed all the good times." Rowan said as if it might be a consolation to the dark male. "They are far more interactive at this point - more fun it's said." And she herself would find out soon enough how much they changed so quickly. 

With a small smile she looked down at her paws. "I hope when my children are born they progress quickly - it's almost more terrifying having them so small and reliant on you than when they start to grow." She confessed. WIth any luck things would move as she expected - that they would be fine and would grow safely and swiftly.