Moonspear Couldn't run away, anyway

He barely heard a response, now he knew fully well that Rain was awake. Her voice sounded weak. He approached the entrance slowly. Afraid, terrified, he had no idea of what to expect to see. He felt as if he had broken her trust. Each step he took he felt more an more guilty. It's clear now, because he had stop being at her side he was betraying her. He wanted to run off and try again another time but he understood that if he ran, it was just like betraying her even more, so he kept stepping forward. Forward until he saw her. His heart quickly filled with despair at the sight of Rain. Nishu had the image of a strong beautiful Rain, seeing her now in a weaken state crushed him. It was worse than any hit he has ever taken.

With this terrible feeling of guilt and despair he quickly turn away. He was unable to even say anything. He had failed to protect her and ended up avoiding her so much that she ended up being even worse than after they found her. Nishu stepped away from the entrance and moved to the side with the wall to his back. It's all his fault that she was like this and it's even worse because he tried to run away. There's no hope of being forgiven, His own weakness made sure of it. A warrior with the heart of a knight brought down because of his actions, there is no one else to blame but himself. He is the reason she is like this, it's completely his fault, He is completely guilty. As he took a deep breath his eyes just started to water. These were the first tears in years. As predicted this was worst than death itself. Even if dying was an easy way out it would not cure him of the guilt he was feeling. The pain in his heart made death seem like a hero that could save him. But that was still the same as running away...