Stone Circle Beginning of hope

His pain struck her like a slap to the face and she couldn't no wouldn't hide the shame in her expression, good ear flattening down against her head and eyes squinting shut. "Because if we had attacked...and Cyron...me and your father wanted nothing more than to try and shred that blasted white furred male and his girlfriend"She paused as her voice took on a fierce note, eyes opening and glinting with anger at the memory of the brute who had met them upon the borders and the black furred female who had been with him. "If we had attacked the whole pack would have been upon us. We would have died and then...then nobody would have been able to do anything for you. It was the plan to come home and figure something else out. But I ached and I hurt and I was weak...I left. I gave up. Your father came home and never stopped searching for all three of you. I wish we had fought them that day...fought across those borders and snatched you up. But we didn't...we didn't and we failed you. I failed you." her voice began to trembled halfway through the explanation until she was crying openly. She lifted her gaze to the stars and fell silent, golden eyes wide and tear filled as she silently stared at the sky with a pain wracked expression. After a few moments she seemed to gain control of herself again. She sucked in a breath and turned to him "No matter what...you are my son. My boy. My Cyron. Whatever they did won't change that. I...I can see you are different. Changed. But even so, I will not yearn for the small boy you were before." she spoke softly, her eyes staring into his. She had of course wished that this never happened and he was still a happy baby boy, but she didn't feel bad enough to not appreciate him here, with her and alive.

"It is enough that you are here and alive. Time...time may never heal Everything. But i swear I'd die before I allow them to hurt you again. Nobody...nobody will ever hurt you again. I failed you once but i won't again" she finished and held her breath. She tensed up and cringed inwardly. This was too much. For both of them. She shouldn't have said all this so soon, what if he decided he hated her? She looked away from him, moving over as if she was afraid he'd shun her. She wished Mawk was here with her, he always knew what to say and do in these emotional times.