Hushed Willows eat your heart out

With Warbone returned to them, Tavi felt more comfortable with leaving the den and stretching her legs. She no longer felt the cramping of her body against the stones, and could freely depart whenever he came near. He was probably quite annoyed at being handed a babysitting gig (and what sort of sitter would he be, she wondered? But she was never around to find out), but Tavi had needs, and she would not always put her son first, even if that was the right way to do things. On this day she had left the baby boy before Warbone had shown up, knowing that the crook was heavily frequented by others. In her mouth hung a rotted chunk of something, although time had worn away its shape. The smell of it seemed to lure a few birds back from the emptiness of the world; as she moved, a pair of crows circled overhead.

Tavi found her favored tree after about an hour of searching. They all looked the same now. At the base of it she put the remains of her first born, but did not immediately cover them. It was like some kind of morbid ritual, except she had no such training. Tavi's goal was to clean out the whelping grotto before the stench of the rotted child's head became noticable, and this was her first shot at it. But once she placed it down, like some kind of seed, she saw a bare glimpse of the boy's tiny, bloated face, and felt a tiny sound break forth from her.

This boy that never was.

Tambourine could have had a brother.

No, it didn't matter - she grit her teeth and sniffed hard, blinking away a mist of tears which had sprung up across her vision. He was gone, like all the others. Like Ukko, like Reek. Tambourine was the only boy in her life now, and he would stay that way. Her son would never leave her, not like — she was mad, Octavia realized. Her mind had been whirring about all day, and now seemed to muddy to the point where she'd notice. She swallowed her thoughts and turned from the remains, ready to leave, to let the crows have them.

But then her belly rumbled.

I think my heart stopped reading this. Again they have hardly any interaction, thought I'd throw her in.

While Kunik held no fondness for Tavi, her loyalty fell with Warbone solely and she just didn't trust his co-Alpha, she wasn't outright rude to her. Or at least in Kunik's mind it wasn't rude, more like avoidance since their first encounter. 

The scent of blood and Tavi worried her, making her come across a heart wrenching scene. The warrior was there long enough to see the woman lay down the tiny, dark body of a dead pup as she sniffled over it. Just as Tavi turned away, the Alpha's stomach rumbled.

Gods, is she going to eat him? Maybe I should step in beforehand. She may not eat her son if someone else is around. Kunik stepped forward with an awkward nod, clearing her throat as she looked everywhere but at the distraught woman. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry."

She turned and stared at what was left of her poor decomposing boy; the head which she had left untouched, the face which had withered and petrified within the cave. Remnants of spinal chord spun out behind it, curving and delicate, but the rest of the child had been broken down and removed. He was in pieces. Octavia could still remember the taste of him on her tongue — what a horrible mother she was, what a monster. She knew that Tambourine would need the nutrients though. Instinct had ruled her in those desperate moments.

Instinct wanted to control her now, and she was mightily tempted, until a voice rose above her thoughts. She spun to face the stranger, equal parts relieved and mortified that someone had found her here and stopped her. The words themselves brought a pained twist to her features; like she was trying to smile, trying to play the part of hostess at some kind of funeral, and discovered it was much too hard. She couldn't fake her way through this interaction. The wolf wasn't even looking at her, though. Probably distracted by the bits and bobs of her first-born.

Maybe that was better. Thank you, she murmured piteously, and with a brief flick of her tongue across her lips, she tried to collect her thoughts and be more -- something. Entertaining? No. Friendly maybe, even if she felt like the living embodiment of death in this private moment. Kunik... Right? There was a myriad of beasts within the keep that Tavi only knew in passing, so it was entirely possible that she had used the wrong name.

What had she gotten herself into? Kunik was not made for comforting people, she would settle with a pat on the back and a there, there. She didn't even know Tavi that well, how could she even begin to comprehend what the mother was going through?

"Aye, that's me. Did any make it?" Kunik gestured awkwardly at the decomposing pup with her muzzle, wondering if the child was the only Tavi had birthed.

Did any make it.

Dimly Tavi thought of her surviving son, and this did lift her spirits a little bit. The gray boy had survived so far and had grown considerably, being round and fat now. Living off the sacrifice of his littermate. She nodded grimly, as she remained looking quite rattled despite the glimmer of happiness in her eyes as she thought of Tambourine. He's... Like a little me, actually. A little gray blob. Except he wasn't so blobby now; he was far more active than she thought he'd be. A survivor. She'd keep him alive through the horrors of this famine with everything she had. A thin smile spreads across her face, but she cannot look at Kunik, nor at the corpse. I thought I'd have a hundred babies with all the fat I put on, heh.

Kunik hadn't hung around Octavia much, she couldn't agree on how large exactly Tavi had been but she suspected all wolves ballooned up when pregnant. 

"Congrats." Kunik offered a smile though the woman wasn't looking at her, trying (and probably failing) to lift the mother's spirits. "If you need help with anything you can ask me, I'd be willing to help." Her distrust did not extend to the boy, Tambourine, and she would never harm him. It was doubtful though that Tavi would ever take her up on the offer, they weren't that close.

She nodded. I need help from everyone if he's going to survive, but he was a fighter, that little boy. Already Tambourine had excelled where she thought he'd flounder; he'd gained weight instead of lost it, and seemed to be a bountiful well of energy whereas everyone else in this place was so dulled by the famine. It still pained her to think that her other son, her first born, was dead and gone. That all that remained was this withered husk of a skull. She looked at it intently now, bowing her head as if in reverence, and loosed a small sigh. Unlike this one. One dead, one alive — it was better to focus on the positive, but Octavia found it so hard sometimes. After a pause she turned back to look at Kunik, her sad smile returning. I suppose one is better than nothing.

Kunik only nodded, there wasn't much to be said. Perhaps she had misjudged Octavia, a tentative relationship seemed to be forming. It was far from friendship, perhaps an alliance of sorts. 

"That's a good way to look at it, you have one son to look after." Kunik was quiet for a moment, staring at the husk of a pup. "..I could bury him if you want?" 

This was a tender moment. She was weakened by her loss, even the reminder of what she had gone through with Reek and Saena, with the creation of the grotto pack, and then the Dragons — it all weighed heavily upon her. Octavia needed closure. Maybe she would never get it (or obtain it to the degree she desired), but she did try every day to make the world better for Tambourine. Focusing on her remaining son was all she could do.

The offer presented to her by Kunik was heart-wrenching. She did not want to say any final goodbyes to this other son, even if he was in pieces. Even if she never got a chance to give him a name, or hear him laugh, or gather any fond memories of him before his passing - she didn't want to forget him. Kunik was offering her something new, though. A sense of solace. Some kind of reprieve from all that had transpired.

She looked down at the son she never knew, and then turned away from it. With a small nod she accepted. That is kind of you. I.. I don't think I could do it. She licked her lips, her tongue sliding across her snout in the form of a nervous tic; and she began to walk away from the grove of willows. They were set to weep eternally over her son, and she couldn't bare to linger out of fear of becoming like one of them.

Kunik only nodded, watching as Octavia walked away. She shook her head in pity, turning and digging a small trench before nudging the tiny body into it. She covered the child with dirt and patted it down carefully. 

Kunik found no reason to mark the grave, it was unlikely that anyone would want to visit. Instead she sat, prepared to sit vigil as was custom of her people. 

"I don't usually believe in you people, but Ma did. She always said you knew when an innocent had died..so you know this pup died. I don't know if heaven is real, if it is please let this little guy in. And if you could, help Octavia." Kunik tried her hand at praying, though she didn't know if any of her Mother's Gods heard her. It seemed to her, the only ones that heard her were the swaying leaves of the willows.