The Sentinels black widow baby

cas is back for a visit!

the scent of his father still marked these borders, Casmir noticed with a pang as he stood at the borders of the redwood forest. but his mother's own fragrance had faded, the perfume of herbs and deep, rich earth. his heart lurched in his chest at the thought she too had died; he wasn't sure if he could take the idea that both his parents were dead.

a long, low howl furled out from his throat, asking for anyone to attend him, any familiar face he could lay eyes upon and be soothed by the knowledge they still existed. Dante was here; Aria; Deirdre. Casmir shook with worry all the same, frustrated tears threatening to spill.

He was healing -- at least, physically, as the infection he once held fled his body thanks to the ministrations of both Lucani and Deirdre. He would still wince when his paw would place the full weight of his body upon itself, and so Constantine favored it, allowing himself the rest his body needed. Had the pack been in full health, it was likely he would have recovered by now.
 
It was harder to care with Lasher gone.
 
It did not stop him from his duties to the pack, however. His thinning form was amidst the borders consistently, and when the low song of another echoed across the sky, the swarthy male was quick to up his pace, seeking out the familiar caller. He dare not consider that finally his brother had come home to them, and yet, when he came upon Casmir, his regal form softened greatly, his ears falling back to his skull, and a gentle whine touching the air as it slipped past his throat and to the ears of his waiting twin.

she heard his call, and moved toward it at a steady clip. after the remembrance ceremony, deirdre felt her own psyche restored. even so, there was a somberness to her now that had not been removed brought on by death and loss. deirdre was a dreamer, but she was no fool. the spirits ensured this, and so had her fathers teachings. upon arriving she noted the sight of constantine, and slid alongside him as she approached casmir. her emerald eyes were filled with love and a sadness that could break ones heart, and deirdre did not stop as she moved--she hoped to swiftly embrace the brother she missed fiercely, and to hold him. to his eyes deirdre would look to be a woman grown and perhaps he would no longer recognize her, but this was not accounted for or thought of; for deirdre had not forgotten his face that had hardly changed but for the melancholy things written upon it. the ambrosial beauty stopped mere inches from him, realizing, now, that she was as tall as he was and no longer peered upward like she had the last time he had been here. it was strange, that realization, but before long deirdre rushed to embrace him, uttering a plaintitive: casmir, as she did. you are home.

Constantine. 

he looked sick and weak, but he was most assuredly alive. Cas' throat constricted and he moved toward his brother, pulling him into a wolfish embrace as his lips trembled with all the words he could not say. the Mayfair boy squeezed his eyes shut for a moment -- he had not though he'd ever see Connie again -- and then pulled away when Deirdre appeared.

she had grown, too fast, he noted, disapproval lighting in his gut at the thought she'd soon be chased by stupid men due to her precocious beauty. but he softened and put that aside for now; he approached the girl and kissed her cheek. "hey, guys," he managed to murmur in a heavy voice. "where's Em and Eelay?"

Casmir was not disappointed to see him -- the thought had nagged the win for some time now, wondering if Casmir held his own time away from the family against him. His muzzle grazed the familiar fur of his brother's neck as he greeted his twin with a proper hug -- wincing only slightly as his injured forelimb brushed in contact in the rush of it all.
 
"Cas," he greeted, pulling back so he could survey his littermate quietly. He looked no worse for wear than the other residents within the Wilds due to the famine, and Constantine was grateful for that. He could only hope this visit was one that sought re-entry back to his true home. As he questioned where their other siblings were, Constantine gave a gentle shake of his muzzle, his own ears pulling back to his dark head. "Eilidh is around.. but Emaleth left after.." He trailed off, finding himself unable to speak of the events that had lead her to do so.

constantine answered, and deirdre heard his voice falter. she swallowed the thick lump in her throat, but knew she had to say it--casmir... our father... her throat clenched. but how could casmir know? she was unaware that aria had went to tell him already, and so she forced it out: he has passed. she looked miserably to the earth, and a wind rolled o'er their shoulders each as she spoke the words. ah, yes, he was still here, and yet that was not how she head meant it. for very long deirdre had pressed herself to be strong--but never did she feel more weak than she did when saying those words that scalded her tongue.

there was so much pain here; Cas felt himself wanting to run, wanting to flee back to the Creek and never return, but he could not. his eyes turned to Deirdre and he nodded, sadness filling his gaze. "i know, Dee -- Aria came and told me." a shaky sigh followed the admission but he would not cry -- not now. he had the entire trip home to weep. 

Emaleth's disappearance was disheartening but not shocking. she was a sensitive little girl, always taking the weight of great occurrences onto her slim shoulders. "did -- did you guys -- " Cas muttered, then let the words trail away. of course they'd looked for her. "what about mom?" the Mayfair boy asked, though no hope flared in his heart at their answers.

Aria had told him.
 
A cringe of guilt clawed at his heart then, knowing the pale she-wolf had sought out Casmir to inform him of the news, and none of his family had. His eyes flashed toward his brother, sorrow within them, and his muzzle gave a shake at the mention of Blue Willow. “Gone.” His words became more hollow as he spoke, and his ears flattened to his skull in that moment. “It’s just us four, now,” he mused, his voice drifting to a bitter undertone. He gave a gentle shake of his head before pulling his muzzle up once more, releasing a gentle sigh. “Are you coming home, Cas?”

posting again <3

god, he wanted to run away. so much pain here -- sorrow. sadness. Casmir bit the inside of his cheek when Constantine answered in the negative about their mother, and tears tightened his throat. his brother asked if he was returning; the Mayfair's shoulders stiffened and then relaxed with a resolute sigh that passed from between his lips. "no. our cousin, Saena -- i've been living with her pack. her kids -- they need me. the pack needs me." 

he felt horrible speaking these words, but they were the truth, and he'd had enough of lies.

Me too. <3

It was a blow to the twin – but he appreciated the honesty, and he allowed a small smile to press to his lips in reassurance. He too had wandered – the time he had missed was now a large regret in his life, and he could only hope Casmir would not feel the same. He made no comment about Saena or her kids – distant cousins that were not Casmir’s close family, but he did not deny that his twin felt a pull to them. Instead, his muzzle tipped forward, brushing his littermate’s cheek with quiet understanding. “Just don’t be a stranger, Cas – I’ll come visit you too.” He released a gentle sigh, his eyes drifting between his two siblings. The day was bleak – the light seemingly dimmed in the world without their father. But Constantine had not seen his sibling for months, and so he would make the best of it. Lasher would not have wanted them to wallow for eternity.
 
“Tell me everything. What’s new.. your new pack..”

it pained deirdre to hear that he would not be coming home to them, for good; he had chosen to remain instead with a woman she had not heard of, and her children. there was a selfish hurt she felt upon hearing that he would not depart these children on his families behalf when he had left she and emaleth for a reason she had yet to discover. but she reminded herself the wrongness of the feeling, and that if casmir could return to them he would; it must be that he could not, and so she trusted in him and in his causes. her love for her family was a thing that could not be defeated by any sliver of doubt or ire; deirdre was devoted to her beloved mayfair clan, and would be unto the end. she remained quiet despite making peace with her brothers wish, though only because she wished to hear him speak on his present life.

it seemed Dee and Connie were not pleased with his decision, but Casmir couldn't just run away from the Creek, not when he was needed there. not when Saena and the kids needed his support. he loved his family here, but he had family elsewhere now too. "Saena is our cousin, and her kids are our fam too," he began lightly. "there's a girl there i like," he added with a wry grin.

"we moved from the Maplewood," and here he gestured, "to beyond the mountains there. it was a long walk, and in this famine ... but we got through it. we are strong. all of us," Casmir finished, glancing between his siblings.

His disappointment was shouldered – instead, the Mayfair put forward a brave face, hoping instead to support his twin as Casmir had him for his initial decision to travel. It would have been easier, perhaps, had Casmir chosen to come home – it surely felt as if Constantine now bore the title of patriarch to their family in Donnelaith, despite his youthful age – though it could have easily been said that Eilidh was the matriarch. However, she had been withdrawn as of late, and opposed to company.
 
He did not know if he could voice these concerns to his two siblings – Deirdre, he could speak anything.. but would Casmir disagree? Only in that moment did Constantine hold the vision of Blacktail Deer Plateau – risen once more with his twin as the Alpha and he as his right hand man – that would have been a life he would have agreed to.
 
“Ah, a girl,” he voiced quietly, feeling the corner of his lips pull up in a soft smile at the idea. His dream slowly drifted away as reality sought him once more, and briefly, he recalled the females in his own pack – he had never put much thought to settling down, himself just yet. But he supposed he was coming of an age to do so. “I would like to meet her – to visit your pack sometime.”

last post for me!

He smiled at Dee, then at Connie when his brother spoke knowingly. "i thought you'd be married before all this," Cas teased gently, grinning at his twin. "like, come home with a wifey or something." a glance to the sky told the boy he must return or travel beneath the threat of darkness, and so he sighed, reaching to kiss Dee's cheek and nudge his brother's shoulder.

"come visit me for sure," he murmured, past the lump that had suddenly jumped into his throat. a wave of his plume was given before Casmir set off for the Creek, some deep hurt in his chest soothed by his visit to Donnelaith.

He made no comment to Casmir’s own past assumptions – Constantine had never considered a girlfriend, nor put much thought toward such now. The females of Tartok had never quite captured his attention, and his thirst for knowledge of the world and then his longing for home and kept him from seeking any relationships. Now that he was home, he was surrounded by family – something he had longed for, but not exactly something that enabled budding relationships. And now, with Lasher passed, his only mindset was to look after his remaining family.
 
“Yeah,” he murmured, tipping his muzzle forward to nudge his brother. He would have offered a visit to their father’s grave for Casmir, but with a glance down to Deirdre, wondered if it would be better if she take him another time.  He watched his brother go, casting out a gentle sigh before he turned as well, drifting back to the heart of Donnelaith.