The Sentinels baby i... i wanna know, what you think, when you're alone

@Deirdre <33 set after she returns from her meeting w Casmir

The pale Donnelaith princess returns from the wilderness with a freshly broken heart. Her paws are sore and her head hurts, but she is far from hungry-- the only positive she can find. The girl crosses the border with a glassy gaze and a feint buzzing in her ears, but the noise doesn't bother her. She isn't really thinking of anything, but sometimes thoughts drifts through her mind, begging for attention. She pays none of them mind, and eventually finds herself in the heart of Donnelaith. She had definitetly traveled, but she does not feel like any time has passed.

Aria does not bother finding her den. Instead she lays herself down on the ground, a few grassy patches sprouting up around her, and lets out a soft sigh. She is tired, sore, and lonely. A great combination for any teenage girl.

deirdre herself was in good spirits. 

she moved as a dancer might through donnelaith, singing the words her father spoke to her in her lilting tones, chanting encouragingly at the buds upon the trees. a familiar scent wafts in her direction, and the fairest deirdre feels excitement in her heart to share the news with her pretty, pale friend. it takes little time to find her, and she senses the mood--even still, her heart was too full with the good news, and she felt aria would be eager to know, too, of her crafts success! 

aria! she greeted warmly, her tail waving behind her. the ethereal youth smiled warmly to the other, and expressed jubilantly, have you seen? the green--it returns! i have asked for aid, and have been given it; we have been blessed, that the spirits favor us so, she moves nearer to the other, who looked as though her journey had been long. where did you go? why did you leave? she was inquisitive, and, after a beat, she withdrew apologetically. ...oh, would you like some rest? for as long as she could remember, deirdre had enjoyed aria, and had considered the elder a friend the moment eilidh had shown her favor.

The pale girl raises her head as the younger arrives, forcing a weak smile at the young Mayfair. "Deirdre," she replies quietly, her tail wagging slowly, thumping gently against the ground. She has seen the grass-- yes-- but has not taken much notice of it. She wonders what the child means by Spirits-- curious if it is similar to her own beliefs-- but makes no immediate comment about it. 

"I know, Miss Mayfair." She smiles, and drops the only word she has to pin down her own religion, "Their souls have returned-- the forest is living again." She touches her nose to the ground for a moment, her ears falling flat against her skull as Deirdre begins to speak again, this time with questions Aria fears. She retracts them, but the pale alpha answers anyway, knowing she means well-- besides, she has a right to know.

"I went to look for food," she says quietly, "and perhaps a new home, if it came down to it." She fails to mention that she had almost abandoned Donnelaith completely, instead moving on. "Don't worry about it, Deirdre, I was gone a while, you have a right to know," she tells her, smiling and glancing back at the white witch. 

deirdre tilted her head at the womans words, and nodded. reincarnation was something she knew of. some souls were granted this, but spirits were simply spirits. they had no identity, although some did truly wish for life! they could manipulate weather when it pleased them, among other little tricks such as this, though they could only exert themselves for so long. these things had been told to her, and even witnessed by her, and so this had become her belief in turn, solidified by the things she had seen, felt. for her adoration of them, she was greatly in their favor--and they, hers!

she looked bemusedly at aria, tilting her head. it has never died--not truly. even in winter, the forest lives still! it only slept for a time. those things that had come were a curse, she breathed, though her tone was not once unkindly. it has begun its awakening. my father taught me the way, and as she looked to the shoots of grass breaking free from their soil, she felt in her soul she had done well! looking around her, she felt her magick here. 

deirdre was surprised by arias words. it had not once occurred to deirdre to leave donnelaith, a place that even when stripped to its bare bones was a haven to her. deirdre did not know aria had explored for the whole of the packs relocation, and her confoundment would be discovered as she queried: you are not leaving, are you? and equally, she betrayed her fondness for aria, her tones more than a little sad. she went on, pressed: what was it that you found?

Aria listens to the child speak and smiles kindly at her. Deirdre was not so much younger than she was, but as she talks to the child the more she wishes she had children of her own. The girl nods, "You know the forest better than I do," she says softly. She has never truly felt the souls she knows of, but in times like these she can see them at work. The trees budding, the grass growing-- she supposes Deirdre may be truthful in saying they never died-- could a soul die? She has never pondered this.

It was then that Aria is taken back, frightened for a moment that Deirdre may know her secret. She shakes her head quickly, repeating the word 'no' a handful of times before she speaks an actual sentence. "No, my Deirdre-- of course I would not leave," she says, shoving the lie away after it is spoken. "I looked for a place for the pack as a whole-- I found nowhere as perfect as Donnelaith." Another lie, for the plateau was one of the most beautiful places she's ever seen-- especially when it was green again, she assumes. "I did, however, find Casmir, your brother," she adds, her smile faultering for a moment.  She does not wish to talk about it in full, really, but feels that Deirdre would be more at ease to know her brother was ok.

deirdre smiled to aria at her words. her relationship with donnelaith was perhaps different than any other wolves, if only because she believed it to be a sentient thing. she treated it as she would treat any other; she loved the place as fiercely as she loved her mother, her father, and was as rooted to it as the redwoods.

and her smile only grew, relief evident as she let out a quiet sigh. deirdre grinned at aria's words, teasing her gently, are you saying that to please me? you please the spirits in saying so, too, she hummed, a light wind coming forth from the trees and causing the branches to drag against one another: laughter! deirdre knew she herself could find no other place more beautiful than donnelaith; she was its flower, and this place was home to her.

the moment casmir's name was mentioned, deirdre was at true attention. she noted the falter in aria's expression, and whatever she had wished to ask was forgotten in favor of her friends emotions. what is it? she asks this in a worried whisper, shifting closer to aria, rife with worry.

Aria lets out a brief laugh, her lips curved in a small smile. "Am I that readable, Deirdre?" she asks the child, not expecting a response. She dips her muzzle and nudges the girls shoulder gently with affection. "You're quite the face reader-- regardless," she says quietly, partially avoiding the question. By now, Deirdre is half a year old and much more mature than most wolves her own age. Perhaps, it would be okay to tell her...

Aria cannot speak for Emaleth, but she is quite fond of the white Mayfair child-- she reminds her of herself. As she stares at the pale witch, she studies her bright eyes before finally letting out a long breath and looking away into the woods for a moment. "When you were still a tiny pup-- still nursing and crawling-- your brother and I were in love," she tells her slowly, her lips twitching into a small smile. She glances to Deirdre to see a reaction before she continues.

the question asked warranted a shy look from the exceptionally observant deirdre. she was an empath, and always wanted all to be well; she worried for those she loved, and counted aria among that number. the nuanced movements were all things she knew on a fundamental level on any countenance, and yet she understood the look implicitly upon the fine silver-eyed woman before her. things that were subtle to some were blatant to deirdre, who knew the look of fear in the eye of a bird to the fierce gaze of a protective doe with a fawn resting nearby. she looked away, nervous to have perhaps disappointed her friend.

but aria went on. her gaze moved back to aria who spoke of casmir now, and as she finished speaking, deirdre was still silent. subconsciously, deirdre had moved closer to aria. and she said nothing in turn, her gaze expectant and full of intrigue, hoping aria would go on, thinking, perhaps, aria would tell her the story. though unwittingly, deirdre goaded her, breathing the heavenly word: love? as i love my father? as i love you? was there a difference? of course aria loved casmir! as deirdre did!

Aria smiles. "Similarly, yes. But there are differences," she tells her sweetly, giving her forehead a gentle kiss. "I love you in a way that I love Casmir, yes, but our love is different," she tells her, hiding the fact that hearing the child say she loved her warmed every part of her body. 

"You see," she begins, shifting her weight to one side as she grew more comfortable where she laid, "We were in love." Her smile falters again, and she glances away from the witch. "To be in love means to love someone with romantic intents-- do you know that word, Deirdre? Your mother and father were in love, which is why they got married, and why they had children." 

deirdre watched aria and tilted her head. while she did not wish to detract from the story at all, she was quite thoughtful. well, i would be married with you, and have children with you, she said, her tail waving. 'twas the innocence of a child speaking, but was also the honesty of one. she hadn't the slightest idea of how children were made; it was a magick yet undiscovered by her! she would say the same of lucani, of osprey! inherently, she did not feel such a way of any of her relatives. she squinted, though not casmir. lucani! and osprey! two more women she loved mentioned off the top of her head. and tachyon! a man she loved dearly. and yet there was a distinction; she did not think of constantine, or eilidh, when humoring children--not that she knew very much at all. after a beat, she added, renoir, perhaps! he tells me that he loves me, that i am his stars. her tail thumped against the earth and she beamed at aria, not realizing the inappropriateness, perhaps, of renoirs affection.

Her face runs hot, and she giggles, but shakes her head. "No, no, sweetheart," she tells her quietly. "That's not what that means," she says, smiling and nudging the child with amusement. After a moment though, her frown fades. "Deirdre, what did you say about Renoir?" she asks, her ears pricked and her eyes wide with wonder and worry. To Aria, love knows no age. She had been in a sexual relationship with a man more than triple her age for a while now, but even she understands that there is a fine line between child and young adult-- and young Deirdre has not quite crossed that line.

She wants to go back and attempt to reexplain what she means by 'in love', but she's now too wrapped around this topic.

oh, she answered, a bit more than confused. it showed upon her features and she cocked her head whilst listening to aria. well, what does it mean...? and then, what happened with casmir? will you tell me the story?

ah, but renoir was brought up again. ah, not his stars, perhaps. no--flower. his angel. it sounded quite sweet, and she, quite young, saw nothing more than words there! he loves me. but you love me, as well, don't you? and father loves me, and emaleth...

She purses her lips, staring at the child quietly. For now, she will let it slide, for she does not truly know the extent of the situation and Deirdre seems unharmed by the man. She is too innocent to know her fears, and perhaps will never have to deal with them. "Of course I love you, dear," she says sweetly, smiling in an attempt to cover her discontent with the previous topic.

"There are different loves, Deirdre," she begins, "One for those who are special to you. I love you in this way, and you love all of your family and friends in this way." She nudges the witch gently. "The second kind of love is for that wolf who you love forever above everyone else. You can care for everyone else, but this one wolf will always be more important to you. You will want to spend every waking minute with this wolf because you can't stand to be apart from them. You will whisper sweet words to one another in the night as you lay beside one another because you want them to know how much you care. And, when the time is right, you will secure your love by having a family of your own. Does this make sense, Deirdre? Do you see the difference?" she asks, hoping to have gotten her point across. 

"I loved Casmir like this. He was my special one who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. But Casmir grew anxious, and decided that he did not love me in this special way--" for lack of better explaination "--and he ran away. I've searched for him for ages-- but that is the first time I've seen him since he left." Her gaze falls to her paws.

deirdre was transfixed by this description, and full of wonder, too. while the ending was not one either of them might have hoped for, deirdre tilted her head and pressed: did you tell him? did you tell him that he was your special one?

Her expression darkens, but out of confusion. "Of course," she says quietly, but for the life of her can't truly remember. She knows that Casmir knows she loves him, and vis versa-- but she knows that Casmir's love is different. He is no longer in love with her, and it hurts to say such out loud. "But I am not his, and so he did not return home with me."

deirdre is saddened to hear of her friends love being unrequited. such a thing was strange. nothing had been such in the life of deirdre, and she wondered if this was normal. and then she wondered briefly if casmir had left because of aria--but then she thrust the thought aside. surely not! for that would diminish the importance of herself and emaleth, who surely he loved more than his discomfort... though was that fair? and then, who was to say aria was the cause of his leaving at all? she was a good woman and friend, to deirdre's knowledge. though she was absent from time to time on her adventures and explorations, aria had done no wrong. then perhaps he was not your special one. perhaps your heart wished for that, but it was not so. perhaps... your special one searches for you, and you do not even know it. her tail waved slowly behind her, hoping to inspire hope and happiness in the silver-eyed lady before her.

As the child speaks, Aria finds herself smiling. "Perhaps," she replies, her tail thumping against the ground with content. "Wouldn't that be great," she adds quietly, more for herself than in response to the witch. "And Deirdre, although he may not be my special one, we will still always love each other-- just as friends should," she says, hoping that concept would get through to the girl as well.

there was relief to be found in the words aria spoke. deirdre loved casmir and aria both -- there would not be awkwardness there, which was good for her to comprehend. i will let you rest now, aria. i hope you see your special one in your dreams, she smiled warmly, and moved to kiss the temple of her friend. deirdre had no devices or cravings for a 'special one' herself--donnelaith and its spirits sated her hunger for such dreams. she then turned to depart, prancing off into the wood only after she made sure aria had nothing more to say.

"Thank you, Deirdre, I will see you soon," she says, placing a gentle kiss upon the crown of the young witch. After seeing the child off, she rests her head on her paws and closes her eyes, drifting to sleep. Howvever, she does not dream of any far off prince coming to rescue her from her tower-- she dreams of Casmir.