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She'd taken to collecting feathers, apparently.  What a weird hobby.  First Banner had those two blue feathers from a week or so ago and now she'd added a couple of white and gray crane feathers to the mix.  It wasn't like she was collecting tropies from exotic kills or anything - no, she'd found the first ones and her most recent addition came in the form of a gift.  She paused in front of her favorite willow tree.  Well, a gift of sorts.  She let out a huff.  Whatever it was.  Right now she couldn't be bothered to break down every second of her time in the marsh.

The short female had chosen her favorite tree a couple weeks back.  It was well away from the Crook, but still comfortably inside the Keep's borders.  She couldn't remember if she told @Stark about it or not, but he'd always been able to find her stuff anyway.  The blue eyed male was good like that.  Banner stepped back from the trunk of the tree, her gaze falling critically on the roots where she'd stashed her treasures.  They came up out of the ground here and there to create teeny little caves - perfect for squirreling stuff away.  Er, perfect for now.  Tambourine might be able to find them when he got a little older, but Banner felt fairly confident that her things were safe.

If there was ever an indication of all of the reasons he'd never bothered settling down it was right now. For the male's first foray into leadership and real and true responsibility he felt he was screwing up. It wasn't to say it was truly his fault - in fact, it was down to the two Alpha's and their children and apparently Mordecai as well - but Stark still shouldered the burden of feeling he should have done more. The dark coated male hadn't seen Octavia since her outburst when she'd pulled away from him and he didn't feel like he had the answers to chase after her. 

His thoughts were sullen, trying to figure out the best course of action. He needed to figure out what had truly happened, he needed to figure out what would be safest - before his thoughts were of keeping Tambourine safe from Reek and his wolves and now it was trying to keep Tambourine safe in the pack that had been meant to protect him. Stark caught the scent of his sister and he gave a soft sigh as he turned his course, following after her with the intentions of letting her know and getting her opinion.

If there was anyone that might make things clearer it was Banner - or maybe, as often as it was, she would indulge his poor choices into the snowballs they tended to be, rolling right down the mountain they lived on. He spotted the chocolate female, his lips twitching into a grim smile. "Banner," He didn't greet her with his customary touches, with the sort of affection she so rarely allowed herself, instead, his blue eyes said it all; there was trouble, and the male wasn't sure how to handle it. "I think I screwed up." 

That familiar voice!  Banner grinned and turned away from the tree, her head tilting playfully in anticipation of a visit with her brother.  How many days had passed since they'd spent any decent time together?  Ah, but that was partially her fault.  Wandering and exploring a couple of the territories around the Keep ensured that her calendar stayed full.  When her eyes finally fell upon him, she blinked owlishly, looking almost comically confused.

"Stark?" she questioned in her low voice, her confused expression quickly morphing into one of concern.  His smile was false - was it forced for her benefit?  A downtrodden air surrounded him and she had to say that it wasn't fitting at all.  Banner took a tentative step closer.  "What happened?"  If she were a betting girl, she'd say this had to do with Octavia and Tambourine's disappearance several days ago.  It looked like her days of exploration away from the willow trees were over.

They had months to make up for. Stark felt like it had been a lifetime - the brash boy-king she'd known before had grown into the man standing in front of her, uncertainty making him fret over the choices before him. Before he could have moved with confidence, let the cards lay as they would. In this he couldn't - not when it meant that Tambourine and Octavia were at risk. "You've noticed the tension," He didn't wait for her confirmation - she wasn't an idiot and he wasn't going to pretend that she couldn't tell what was happening around her. 

"There was....something that happened between Harlyn, Octavia, and the kids. Octavia thought that Tambourine was hurt, apparently it had to do with Harlyn's injury and one of her kids went after Tambourine - got his neck. She thought he was dead." He didn't really know what had happened but he needed to know exactly what had happened and if he could figure it out he might be able to get things under control. He sighed softly, shaking his coat out. 

"She's talking about leaving. About us leaving." He sighed it out, the tension clear in his body. "It wasn't supposed to be like this - and I don't know what to do. It's like I'm going against her trying to talk to Harlyn but I don't want to just leave. And I don't want to abandon her either." 

One raised brow was the only response she gave to his first statement.  He didn't give it long to sink in before he continued and that was a good thing becuase Banner would have had words for him.  Several words.  Most of which woudldn't have been very nice.

Her green eyes widened when he launched straight into what happened.  When he shook his coat, Banner moved forward and touched her dark nose to his shoulder as she continued to listen to his voice.  She was now able to feel the rumble of his deep voice.  It didn't take much for her to imagine the rage Octavia felt at her son being attacked.  The Alpha was incredibly protective of her son - suddenly her absence made sense.  If something like that had happened, temporary seclusion was understandable.

But wait, she'd spent time with Tam just a couple of days ago.  "I saw Tambourine the other day - he's no worse for wear," she replied into his fur, skipping over what he'd said about leaving for now.  "He's a resillent kid."  And so young.  "Is Octavia..?"

Banner trailed off, not sure how to end her question.  Was Octavia okay?  Going to run off in the middle of the night?  Now permanently pissed at Harlyn?  Ready to rage war against anyone who so much as looked at her son the wrong way?  The short Marauder shuddered.

As she always did Banner asked the real questions. She got to the heart of his worries, alluding to what he had considered and they acted as two halves of the same whole. She was his strength, and he the confidence for her. Together, he'd always considered them impervious. "She's...different." He admitted. "I don't even know if she trusts me right now, and she's never been like that with me." Really, it only proved that he didn't truly know Octavia at all but he didn't need to either. 

"I'm almost afraid I'm going to find them gone. What then? I can't let them just go. I care about them - I really do." He admitted. He didn't know if he could love in a sense different than how he loved Banner or Rhodey, but, he did care greatly for Octavia and Tambourine. It was impossible to press his emotions further, just on the cusp of the affection he had for the greyscale woman she rejected him - doubted him. It was a slight to him, and his wounded pride made it harder to choose.

"There's no right answer here. I leave with them, I'm leaving the pack I promised to take care of - I leave the rank I earned and the wolves I helped keep alive and I leave Harlyn and her family when I said I'd help them too. I couldn't ask you to leave - I'd never make you - but...I can't leave you either. I can't let them just go out there, her with such a young kid. I'd find them dead. I know I would." 

No matter what he chose to do it would mean the hurt of the other. There was no answer that seemed right, no move that would mean he could keep them all safe. It was impossible. 

She listened to it all, not wanting to interrupt her brother while he was on a roll.  Talking about his emotions - his true feelings - had been something of a rarity as far as Banner could remember.  He'd been more content to roll with anything and allow his over-confidence and larger-than-life ego rule his decisions.  It made him uniquely Stark and she loved him all the same, but he'd matured beyond their younger days since moving to the Keep.  And now.. now he clearly struggled with doing the right thing versus doing what he wanted to do.  If he even knew what he wanted to do.

Drawing back from his shoulder, Banner looked him straight in the eye.  Her short stature meant her neck had to crane up a bit due to their close proximity, but it didn't do much to lessen the fierce look in her eye.  "You will do what you need to do," she said firmly.  Her features softened then, her tail wagging back and forth a couple of times in a vain effort to lighten her next words.  "And I will follow."  Her words were bold and deliberate with no trace of question to be found.  He'd more than earned his leadership rank and Banner held all her faith in him.

As should Octavia, she thought wryly.

"Why doesn't she trust you?" she asked, her low voice adopting a heated tone.  What the hell could he have possibly done to warrant any of this?

It was such a hard thing to do - to open up, to share that Stark couldn't fathom what that might really mean. This was different though, it was sharing with Banner, it was talking with her. Under a different sun and moon without their shared blood she would have been the one he pursued, and now, in the midst of how complicated things were quickly becoming even now it might have been easier. Stark sighed as he finished, the silence sweeping in and taking hold of him. His confidence was gone in that moment, the dark male letting his vulnerabilities show in favor of being utterly open and honest with his sister. 

She was unwavering; unyielding in her loyalty as she had always been. Stark leaned down, nuzzling beneath her muzzle for a moment. He found comfort in her in ways he couldn't explain to anyone else under any other circumstances. No one else did for him what Banner did. "I'd be lost without you." He whispered softly as he pulled back. He felt that twinge in her, knew the moment that the anger had blossomed in Banner - just beneath the surface, that sort of simmering sensation. It changed the air around them even, and he looked at his sister. Really looked at her. Drank her in, anger and all. 

There was no fear in him, not like with some others - though Banner was better than he had seen her in the past. This was just the rise of her voice, the shift of her speech. "I can't begin to understand. This is why I've never tried, y'know. It's just a matter of time before I screwed up somehow." Stark said with an exasperated tone.  Tried - he still couldn't give a name to whatever was happening between himself and Octavia. They were progressing but in ways he could not understand. Every step forward brought them back many steps and this - what then?

She knew he'd be lost without her.  And Banner would be lost without Stark.  It was a sibling relationship unlike any she'd ever seen, which made what they had all the more meaningful to her.  All of this went without saying on her part, of course, but he knew.  The way she brightened up in his presence, the simple and steadfast way she always had his back - there was no way he didn't know.  They were different and yet somehow on the same wavelength.  It just worked.  Somehow.

The short female huffed, her angry expression not changing with his exaspiration.  Wallowing in self-fulfilling prophecy wasn't usually his style.  This clued Banner in to the depth of his feelings for Octavia, a fact that gave her pause.  Stark was not known for his discretion with the fairer sex.  To have pledged himself so fully to one female, to support her in everything she did right down to her child who was not biologically his?  She frowned.  Her brother had more than honored Octavia in every sense.  How could she not see that?

"I don't get it," she stated flatly, the heat gone from her tone.  Her anger hadn't been great enough to bubble over, apparently, which was probably for the best.  Stark didn't need that right now.  He needed someone on his side - she would always be that wolf.  "Have you told her?  Asked her directly?"  If not, what the hell was he waiting for?  "This.. fight complicates things, but you should tackle one issue at a time.  Figure out where you stand with her first - the rest will fall in line."

Banner was no expert in any of this, of course.  But it made sense to her.  If he spread himself too thin.. well, he couldn't help anyone.  And if Octavia wasn't on the same page, he shouldn't set himself on fire just to keep her warm.

Stark was usually the vision of confidence. He never wavered in front of people and since departing on his own he'd felt it blossom even more. He'd come into his own, truly, without being in his father's shadow or worse Captain's. He'd never had the bond he had with Banner with her, there'd never been the strength in their bond or it's own perfection like with his chocolate sister. He licked his lips, listening to her for a moment. 

The world was still when she was around, his brain not boistering and struggling to focus. Silence greeted him, made it so easy to think clearly when he was in her presence. "Told her?" He echoed dumbly, blue eyes blinking for a moment. "What? That...that I have no idea what I'm doing or how I feel?" He asked, frowning. "Banner - I'm not....look, Tam's dad is out there still, and it's me. How long do you think this is really gonna work? Me, a dad - a mate?" It didn't work in his head. Maybe Banner could see something that Stark couldn't but, it was difficult and complicated at least in his head.

"I butted heads with dad all the time. I was never good enough. I don't want to make that the same reality for anyone else." And then they were talking like it was a done deal. Like this was just...it was. But it was still Octavia. "One minute it's like she can't get enough of me, the next, she's mad. I don't think I'm much more than just.....stable. Ironically." He said glumly. "Maybe I ask her how she feels. And then what? I go cry for a week? God. This pack is just gonna get more and more awkward."

She listened to him as he went off, the thoughts and feelings he'd held back tumbling out all at once.  Banner stood before her brother, a steady, reliable source of strength for him.  He wasn't generally so open with others, but with her.. well, the pages of his book were free to flip through.  Of course she thought he coud be a dad and a mate.  Of course she did!  How could he not see that in himself?  In all other things confidence rolled off of him in waves, but in true matters of the heart he'd always been guarded.

She sighed, her expression softening for him.

But that didn't stop the anger from simmering just below the surface.  The more he admitted, the more suspicious Octavia's behavior became to her.  "So.. what, you're just a convenience for her?" she blurted out hotly.  Banner had a hard time reconciling the Octavia she knew (which was admittedly not well) with the Octavia he was describing.  "She has her son, has the pack and couldn't control either situation.  You come along, she leans on you, and now she's pushing you away?"  Her basic run-down of events, bare bones though it was, painted a very different picture of her brother's lover.  Her green eyes bore into Stark's blue, her expression hard.  "I don't know that I buy it."

She didn't want to buy it.  There was no way.. she'd seen the affection the Alpha held for her brother.  It was real.  Wasn't it?

He didn't think it was just anything. He hoped it wasn't. His fears were mostly because of his own insecurities, at least in this regard. He'd never felt like a lesser person to his mother or to Banner, but, he'd worried he wasn't enough. Wasn't good enough. Strong enough. So many things he'd felt he'd let others down in and he didn't want to be just another in a long line of people who had done that to Octavia. "I don't....think it's like that? I don't know -" He sighed out, finally getting to the root of his frustrations. Aside from Octavia's wildly swinging moods and Stark's growing realization he had no idea who Octavia was before he'd met her, he didn't know where he stood. He hated that. 

Stark was a man who was ruled by his emotions, sure. His quick processing meant he didn't always give himself time to think of things - he chose not to. And in this, he felt he was giving himself the farest shot he could. He couldn't get swept up into the fight brewing between the two leaders. They needed level heads in this. It had to work out. Even if it was Stark and Banner helping them out it would be harder for the sake of Tambourine and risky for them too. Lone wolves, other packs, the wild life they hunted - all could spell disaster for the young child. "She's never looked at me like that before. Like she wasn't sure I was on her side. Like she doubted me." 

It was a ridiculous notion, and maybe in a way a testament to his feelings for the woman even if he couldn't label them. Anyone else and he wouldn't have cared what they thought - but it was Octavia. 

The anger fizzled out of her when Stark described Octavia's doubt.  Her expression turned pained and she stepped forward again to bury her face in his dark pelt.  Banner wanted desperately to shoulder his angish, his self-doubt - this was not the brother she knew.  Her Stark was a self-assured, confident male.  Her Stark made quick decisions and somehow forced everything to work out.  Her Stark was the best of both of them, the one who shielded her when she felt weak and encouranged her when she didn't want it but dearly needed it.

The short Marauder took in a shaky breath.  "Talk to her," she murmured, her low voice muffled in his fur.  "You'll go round and round with yourself until you face it head on."  Oh, and she was one to talk about such things.  Banner was more apt to turn tail and run from an emotional conflict like this.  Words weren't her thing.  She couldn't rage herself out of having a heart-to-heart.  But Stark had always been a smooth talker.  He'd do well.

He had to.

"We'll figure out the rest later," she added, determination coloring her voice.

Stark breathed out a slow sigh when Banner pressed herself against him, his eyes closing as he settled for a moment. Just like that, there was silence; Banner pushed the rest of the world away and he was okay for that moment. He'd focus on what she said, the instructions she gave him, and the rest could wait for just a little bit. 

Talk to her. Banner said it like it was so easy, like something would be corrected with just a few moments of carefully chosen words and maybe some heartfelt whispers. "As long as you're with me, I'm okay." He said softly. It was a genuine feeling - if not a terrifying one. "Let's...let's go catch some fish, maybe eat something and I'll go find Harlyn." He said quietly. He needed to be prepared and he needed some more time to get his thoughts together. 

phone post >_>

Banner let out a soothing "hmm" against her brother's shoulder.  She knew what she'd said wasn't exactly a solution, but there were no easy answers here. It was going to be messy, apparently.  Whatever issues Octavia had with Stark seemed to carry greater implications and Banner was hesitant to even bring them up.  But nothing could be resolved if they didn't at least talk about it.  The Keep had enough avoidance issues in leadership already - they couldn't afford something like this. 

"You know, I've never been fishing," she mused quietly as she pulled back from the comfort of Stark's embrace.  Banner huffed playfully, all too eager to get the seriousness of their conversation behind them, and batted at her brother with one small paw.  "Guess you'll have to teach meee," she said in a sing-song voice.

Seemed like a good close!

Banner had never been fishing? Jeez, he'd failed her as a brother. Or their father as a guide, but, Stark was quick to criticize Curran. He licked his lips, nudging her with his nose as he nodded. "Gotta keep up, Banner." He said with a smirk. "Can't show off all my genius. I might have just a bit to spare for you though." He teased as he lead her out to the river. 

It was an easy way to pass the time, something that took little effort with his body and far more with his brain; it was a point he excelled at. Teaching Banner was comforting too. By the time they'd gotten themselves a little pile of fishies to split, Stark was settled far more. His anxieties over the situation had eased some and while there still was no clear cut answer, he at least knew that he'd have support during it. 

It wasn't the first time he'd considered himself lucky to have Banner - and he knew it wouldn't be the last.