The Sunspire Nerves

For @Ferdie Von Pelt

Red was fidgety that evening as the sun lowered in the sky. She had been fidgety ever since the war with Fox and her packmates. She found that, no matter how hard she tried, she just could not settle down. Her den near the base of the mountain, which was really nothing more than a slightly-bigger-than-herself hole beneath a jutting cliff, was extremely uncomfortable. Finally, she decided it was probably too soon to be sleeping, anyway, and crawled back out into the open. The first stars were just visible in the darkening sky, and, truth be told, it was quite beautiful out. The weather had been fair for most of the day, and thee was not a cloud in sight to block the sky.

Sighing, she sat down outside of her den, staring up into the night, wondering what was in store for her and her packmates. Briefly, she wondered if she had made the right choice coming here. She would defend her pack to the death, yes, but that didn’t mean she wanted to. She’d had no idea upon entering Ferdie’s pack that they were at war with another, or she might never have joined. Of course, she could always escape to her forest if things got too bad. But… she was a pureblood wolf in heart and knew she would get lonely without the numbers of a pack to surround her and make that forest home.

She shook her head. She was very confused lately.

Ferdie Von Pelt could not sleep he had captives to keep and though there were under someone else's care so that he could sleep but he just couldn't. He wanted Swiftcurrent to go away and leave them in peace, if they did that then he and his new family could be at live happily.

He didn't set up camp right in swiftcurrent creeks back yard there was so much space between the creek and The Sunspire, yet swiftcurrent creek wolves insisted in coming up here. Ferdie had hardly had anytime to bond with his pack mates, something he so badly wanted to do.

Swiftcurrent creek robbed him of so many things and they were continuing to do so, it irked him. Ferdie was about to leave The Sunspire and go somewhere.... he wasn't sure yet, but then he noticed Red, the little female he had no had contact with since she joined, though her scent had been on new comers so he couldn't help but be proud of her.

Ferdie walked over to her and sat down next to her, Swaying his tail in greeting, hoping to convey to her he just wanted to spend time in her presence.

Red heard and smelled Ferdie coming long before he arrived, and she didn’t know quite how she felt about that. Even though she had made no mention of her sudden urge to leave the Sunspire, she felt as if he already knew and was coming over to berate her for abandoning her pack. She was at war with herself inside, since she was very, very instinctually loyal to her Alpha and other pack members. So the fact that she also wanted to leave them was… difficult to swallow. She silently cursed her Coyote blood in that moment for being so damned nomadic and stubborn. And if her urge to leave really was due to her nomadic blood, who was to say she would stay with whatever pack she formed, if she did? How did she know she wasn’t just doomed to wander the Earth, staying in one place no longer than a few months and then feeling the overwhelming need to move on?

She sighed when he came and sat next to her, and felt the slight brush of his tail on her as he greeted her. She felt sick to her stomach, knowing that she would eventually have to tell him. And she was deathly afraid he would kick her out for wanting to leave. Which… made sense, in a way, if he did, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt. Awkwardly, she swallowed the lump in her throat, wondering if he would want to talk with her. She hated talking. Which was going to make telling him about wanting to leave even harder. She wasn’t sure if she had the words.

She trembled slightly, gritting her teeth and trying to make her body relax. It didn’t work. She simply sat there, shaking as if sick, and facing forward with an expression of stone.

Ferdie understood that it was in the nature of the hybrid's to roam and Ferdie knew that they were less likely to stick around forever they seemed less loyal then wolves but braver and more fierce as far as he was concerned, when they were on his side at least, he was proud to call them family.

Ferdie liked her lack of speech and didn't push the talking, he reached over and gently nuzzled the back of her ear in his attempt to sooth her, then he noticed a tuft of winters coat clinging to her and he gently tugged it free. Now he was unhappy with teh minute hole that left in her coat and he sighed. Shifting closer he touched her again waiting for her reaction if she nipped at him he would not groom her if she sat still he'd start grooming her pelt.. nip nip pluck spit out the hair, nip nip pluck spit, he was very well practiced at grooming he spent hours at it, his pelt shone like no other wolves.

He enjoyed spending time with her even if he seemed to be forcing himself upon her, he didn't ask what was on her mind, it was obviously nothing good, she trembled like a leaf, he hoped grooming her would settle her down some and let her know he wasn't going to eat her. not literally anyway

:D I love Ferdie. He’s like, “Oh, she’s bothered… Hmm…” *begins fervently grooming and nit-picking at her. “Maybe THIS will he— damn! I messed it up!” *groomgroomgroomgroom* “IT MUST BE PERFECT.” Also, what? Is he going to FIGURATIVELY eat her? “…and let her know he wasn't going to eat her. not literally anyway”

Red tensed when Ferdie plucked the tuft of fur from behind her ear. For the first split-second, she had been terrified that he was trying to bite her. But her shoulders sagged a moment later when all he did was groom her a little. There was a lull, and then he touched her again, and his body language asked if he could groom her. She made a short, whining sound to his question, which was her answer: “Yes.” Then she sat still as she waited for him to begin.

She wasn’t sure if she was truly okay with Ferdie grooming her, but he was her Alpha, at least for now, and so she put up with it for him. Besides, they were friends. Or, at least, she thought they were friends… Come to think of it, she realized she hadn’t even spoken to him since joining the Sunspire, and then felt like kicking herself. How was she going to get into his good graces if they never spent any time together? Well… actually, what was the point in getting into his good graces, anyways, if she was just going to leave in a few months?

She shook herself. No, she wouldn’t think like that. It was in this moment that she decided that no matter what, she would always try to be on the Sunspire’s good side, even if she left to start her own pack. Maybe the two packs in themselves could be friendly with each other, provided neither of them did anything mean to the other? Yes, that would be nice. If only it was realistic at all. The moment Red told Ferdie of her intentions to leave, he’d probably try to kill her. Then where would she be? Defenseless, and packless.

This whole situation sucked.

um... I dunno where I was going with that... it was 1am for me I'm surprised my posts made any sense what so ever :P

Ferdie worked his way from her head down her shoulders until red fur lay in abundance upon the ground. The mild breeze picking up the fur and blowing it around like dandelion seeds. Stopping finally he nudged her shoulder once and looked up to the sky. The stars were plentiful and the sky offered a view like no other.

You fought bravely Ferdie finally spoke not expecting any response I am proud to have you in my pack, I can't wait to hunt with you red. Ferdie grinned imagining her petite form leaping bravely upon a goat. Ferdie looked back at the sky totally oblivious to her inner turmoil and yawned, finally getting tired.

he noticed her den was down here where she could slip away from the pack unseen or where she'd be the first to spot trouble he hoped it was that one that was the reason for such a den placement, but he never knew with the hybrids. He wondered if she met Fang yet...

Against her better judgement, Red decided to let Ferdie’s grooming relax her, and relax her it did. He had found her weakness — being touched. She craved touch. Needed it. It was a must for her. And so, being touched like this by her Alpha, even if all he was doing was grooming her, was heaven. She let her eyes close, and gave a great sigh of relief, allowing a smile to tug at the corners of her mouth. In a little while, though, he was done with his nit-picking, which he signaled by nudging her shoulder. She sighed again, this time in disappointment, but said nothing about it.

“You fought bravely,” Ferdie said after a time, which caused Red to nearly jump out of her fur. She had resigned herself to the silence, so this sudden intrusion was a bit frightening. It was quiet that night, so his voice seemed to boom in her ears. His next words stabbed more guilt into her heart about leaving, and she whined and flattened her ears against her head.

“Ferdie…” she whimpered out, but could not go on. What was she to tell him? I’m leaving the pack to start my own, have a nice life? No. That wouldn’t do at all. She needed to come up with a way to say it without it sounding like she was just abandoning them all.

Ferdie smiled as she spoke his name he did not hear her speak often, still completely oblivious to her distraction he placed his chin over her back and tucked the small female to his chest under his chin. There he could hold her and protect her, just as she had protected his borders. He was proud of her his tail swayed as he conveyed that message with his body.

He watched the stars for a time with her tucked into him for as long as she would allow, Have you seen the hot springs up on the mountain He wondered aloud idly They are quiet nice... especially if you don't mind getting wet He chuckled to himself a deep rumble in his chest. again it was a offering of words that didn't need a verbal reply, he just enjoyed his own voice. And Red allowed him to listen to himself.

I know you said you wanted to wait another thread before Red tells Ferdie she wants to leave, but ICly I don’t think she has it in her to wait anymore, especially since he’s being so nice to her and she feels like she’s taking advantage of him for it. Also, like my table? ^_^

Ferdie’s words about the hot spring went completely unnoticed and ignored by the coywolf. After only a moment or two, she pulled away from him and backed up, ears flat on her head, tail tucked between her legs, body nearly on the ground. All of these were signs of ultimate submission. She might as well have been showing him her belly as a “white flag”. She couldn’t hide it from him. Not anymore. She just couldn’t. There were things that needed to be said, even if she hated speaking. She had to get over that, for the sake of her sanity. He deserved to know if one of his own was going to leave him, especially since she might very well be taking a few of the Sunspire’s members with her. He had taken her in, given her food and protection, and what was she doing? Plotting to leave behind his back. That was… traitorous. Even if he kicked her out for it, she couldn’t hide the truth from him any longer.

Ferdie… she began aloud, using her voice. I… How - how would you feel if… She took a deep breath. If I said I… might be leaving. To - to start my own pack. W-would you be… angry? She stared up at him with wide eyes, breaking instinct to do so. It was not right to stare a wolf directly in the eyes unless you were challenging them. It was not Red’s intent to challenge Ferdie, but she couldn’t help looking at him. Would… would you chase me out for it?

Her heart pounded in her ears and her whole body trembled. After only another moment, she broke eye-contact with her Alpha to stare at the ground. He would answer her how he would, and there was nothing she could do to stop whatever decision he made in the end. If he wanted to kill her, she would submit. If he wanted to chase her out, she would run and never return. These thoughts and more raced through her mind and made her nauseous. What would he say? What would he do? Waiting for his answer was agony…

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oh well by rushing it at least he didn't have the chance to fall to far in love with her. :( I was hoping for a little more drama :D

Ferdie let her move and stared down at her, what words she did speak were harsh, he lifted his head and looked out the the stars, after all this fighting he just wanted a family a pack to call his own and to love, yet here hew as with wolves whom held no loyalty no cares for what their actions caused he knew what hybrids were like and yet he let them into his pack and dared to let this one into his heart.

Love... yet again Love plucked at his heart and broke yet another string but this time he would not snap not like last time. He didn't return his gaze to her, he thought about pissing on her making sure she was his to claim, his to own. But in the end no living being was his to own.

Red.... he sniffed; He had been unaware until this moment he had feeling for her, and those feelings were now dashed if you dare take a single member of this pack when you leave I will make you regret it. Even more so then what Fox has made me regret. He still refused to look at her as he continued to speak But, no as long as you are a member of my pack, I will not chase you away, nor will I attack you when you leave as long as you leave my pack intact Ferdie Von Pelt stood and walked away stiff legged not sparing the hybrid another glance.
Her questions were answered his own were just beginning

oh yeah, the table is ok but personally I'd love to see Red in the top in the woods somewhere

Red listened with a heavy heart as Ferdie spoke to her, his voice having taken on a tone that she did not like. She watched as he walked away stiff-legged, all amiableness gone from his body language. The coywolf had thought that by telling him about her plans in advance, it might mean that she and the Sunspire could remain friendly with one another when she left, but that didn’t seem to be the case now. Red wanted to curl up on the ground where he had left her and hide her face under her paws, and at the same time, she wanted to run around like crazy, knocking into things and tiring herself out. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep now…

In the end, she ran down the mountain and fled as far as her paws would take her. There, in some unnamed area of the Wilds, she collapsed in exhaustion and sorrow. How was she ever going to leave now…?

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