Blacktail Deer Plateau She said shut up and dance with me

She was quiet as the Alpha male and the Beta pair took in her words. Lasher and Dante were both accepting; the former asked a question while the latter wished her luck. Although she'd set her heart on leaving, these were not the easy responses she'd anticipated, and if anything, strengthened Saena's resolve to leave. Though it wasn't their intention, Lasher and Dante had made her feel as though she wasn't worth fighting for for just a moment, and that was enough.

Blue Willow, however, stayed her for a moment. She'd planned to just say her goodbyes and leave, but her aunt's downcast eyes said everything that the healer was unwilling to vocalize. Saena couldn't tell that Blue Willow was angry, but she could tell upset when she saw it, and when Blue Willow did speak, Saena knew she would answer.

"Both," she admitted. "It has nothing to do with you, Aunt Willow. You'll always be my family. But," she went on, "Koda's behaviour made me realize that, no matter what I do here and no matter if I ever rose to lead, I'd be leading wolves, or at least one wolf, who don't respect me. I'd be living with wolves, or a wolf, that barely tolerate me. That isn't the pack I want to lead, and his constant judgment isn't what I deserve." Saena was wholly unaware that Koda's misogyny had already been brought up with him, but it wouldn't have mattered. Even if he kept his mouth shut from now on, there was no way Saena could ignore the veiled contempt he held for her, and she for him. "If I led here, I would kick him out. I'm sure there's a reason he's still allowed to be here, so I would be held in contempt for that.

Osprey, too. If I ran this pack, she wouldn't be a part of it anymore. She broke a law, a major law." Saena took a deep breath here, not wanting to linger on names or deeds for long, although she did point out that, "when Junior undermined your authority, she was treated very harshly, for a crime that was less than this. I believe if it was anyone but Osprey who came back pregnant, they would be treated harshly. I believe her status as your friend is clouding your judgment."

All of this was said levelly and objectively; for once, Saena wasn't ruled by her opinions or emotions, even if she'd just insulted the leaders to their faces. It truly wasn't meant as an insult; it was sincere. "And that's how you run things, and that is your right as leaders, but that's not how I would run things. Authority means something to me, and actions have consequences, and I couldn't stand by and let these things happen if I led. I don't think it would be fair to change the pack to suit me," she said, and after a short pause, added, "and I don't think it'd be fair that I would have to abandon my principles to lead it."

Taking another deep breath and steadying herself against what she thought would be cold indifference to her opinions, Saena finished with, "it would be better for me if I founded my own pack, with wolves who respect me for being me, and it would be better for Blacktail Deer Plateau if I didn't lead it, and if I left instead." Despite herself, her eyes were wet. "I would intend this pack to remain an ally of mine, whenever I claim land for myself, and your wolves—save Koda—would always be welcome visitors. I don't want to do what dad did and just suddenly leave without saying goodbye to those I love, including you," she quickly assured them, "and while this is my farewell to you three, I'm asking for a couple days to say good bye to Pura and Valtyr, as well."