Sunbeam Lair Take [m]e out, make me think about it

Jolon did trust his family, Asterr included, but regretted ever making such bonds. Or maybe that was what the voices told him again. He couldn't say what was him and what was not, not anymore. This hollowness, this confusion had taken control, and it made him belief that whatever he was doing now would help. It was a combination of of lust and hatred. He didn't want to feel this way, and perhaps this was his way of calling out for help. Did it even matter what happened to Asterr if he did this? Did it matter to him if she wanted this or not? Jolon cared, but not whatever was inside of him now.

I'm sane... He rumbled, denying his problems once again. The soft twinkle in his eyes grew dull as he lost himself in the lies he told himself every night. It was true that he would chase her wherever she would go now to get the satisfaction he so desired. Fleeing was pointless. This was her home too, and he knew it would require another war to make her move away. Not to mention she absolutely adored her followers, or so it seemed. Not even his lust would make her disappear forever, and as soon as she came back -if she managed to flee-, he would try again; whether she would be in heat or not. 

He turned a sinner right then and there as he tricked the young, little dragoness, his nose reaching her flower. It was not that he had done his before that he knew what to do, it was instinct. He pushed away her tail, with force or not, his body following not too long after. Finally he had the upper hand in this dangerous game he was playing with his own leader, he thought as he tried to jump on her, forearms desperately trying to hook themselves onto her haunches.