The Sentinels shillelagh

deirdre listened simply to listen, not to retort or respond. she wanted to understand, she wanted to know; she did not wish to defend her actions, nor skellige's. deirdre wanted larkspur to be safe and out of harms way, and though deirdre thought herself capable of this she felt that if larkspur did not, who was she to force her to see things her way? deirdre knew that the best thing to do for those that you loved was to set them free when they wished it, though it made her want to scream and weep and wallow in this miserable feeling that was like a yoke around her. deirdre would not cage the golden bird, who had taken with her some of her heart.

starbuck then spoke of skellige, and again deirdre listened. it was not for her to make starbuck trust the man, though she wondered at who starbuck spoke of. someone spoke against the man but also against his promise to her, to donnelaith--that he would harm any within her ranks was expressly against what they had once spoken of. deirdre was thoughtful for a long moment, but her own trust toward the man went beyond that of one of his mistrustful followers. she had learned her own trust through her experiences with the man; words were fragile things that could manipulate the mind to darker things.

deirdre only spoke when starbuck questioned her. my eyes are open to things seen by all and things seen by few, and i believe what my eyes have brought me to witness. skellige has saved me, more than once and each time without my asking. he has given me much and taken from me nothing. he would not turn a fang against you, starbuck; he promises this forest further protection. he is unlike anything i have ever known. when my father passed, he was present; he stayed with me when i was not myself, when i did not know myself. he lent me his strength, and even when i was weak, he did not move against me, deirdre breathed in and out. it was skellige who first came to save me from the bear, and my brother aided him. he could have come for you, come for larkspur--he sacrificed himself for me, instead of something i know he believed in with all of his heart was meant to be his own, deirdre blinked, aware, now, of the word that starbuck had used... love...

and something seemed to click. i did not know i loved him so, but i do. i do not know that i would be here this day without him, for the bear had been out for more than simply her blood. deirdre's eyes drew to him, and she offered her friend a wan smile. i do not ask for you to love him, but i do wish that you might give him but one more chance, if you have room in your heart for such a thing, this request was quiet, and truly just that, a request--never could she demand starbuck to do any thing that her intuition warned her against! but in this wish, i would have you defy me if you feared for your safety, deirdre pressed, her ears pricked forward.