Grouse Thicket all we know

She spoke, and he could tell almost immediately that she was completely and utterly sincere. She said that she did want him there, that she cared for him, and although it may be rash and foolish, it was how she felt. Nico swallowed thickly and looked away, unsure of how to react. To be honest, he had never expected to settle down, he found the idea that someone would care for him - the broken and vulnerable version - was absurd, because in this world, only the strong survived, and he was sure he made it pretty clear that he was not the wolf he told the world he was. Nicolas deWinter was not strong, in fact, he was the complete opposite: he was weak and broken, defeated and subdued, beaten by the boulders that life threw at him.

In a way, he was ready to give up. He liked Aeronwyn, but like the others before her, he did not believe she would stick around when she saw who he was. Yet, she proved him wrong, and now, he didn't know what to do. So, the soldier remained silent, and simply listened to the rest of her words. Nicolas felt a numbing feeling of surprise at the strength of her emotion, and the fire that blazed in those cool silver orbs, but still, he said nothing, eyes carefully averted once more as he considered his options.

Because Nicolas was tired; he was exhausted from running from his past, from his alter ego that threatened to overrule his dominance within their mind and body, and one day, he feared that Sargent would take over, because Nico no longer had the willpower to fight back. Perhaps, the easier way was to just get it over with; to suicide, end his life, kill himself. It was the quickest, easiest, and most painless way out, but it was also the most selfish way out and as he looked back into Aeronwyn's eyes, he realised that he couldn't do it to her.

And so the soldier heaved a quiet breath and blinked. "Okay," he said softly, straightening himself up and squaring his shoulders. The movement seemed almost automatic nowadays, drilled into his mind by his drill sergeants and command officers, and it felt familiar, easy, a place he could just almost call home. But it wasn't home, it could never be home, not anymore, and a bitter feeling found its way to his tongue. Not for the first time, Nico wondered if he would ever find a place where he belonged once again. The idea that he would belong seemed so surreal that if it wasn't for Aeronwyn being so serious, he was pretty sure he would've laughed himself to hysterics at the idea that he could have a home.

But she was there, and so he calmed himself down, shook his coat so it was ruffled in more of a bad boy wanderer look than one that gave others the impression of 'i have a mental disorder and suicidal tendecies'. Nico looked at Aeronwyn then, and offered her a familiar lopsided smile, green eyes still guarded, but held within them, just the tiniest hint of the spark that they used to hold. "Take me home?"