Ravensblood Forest i've got a heart, i've got a song

“Yes,” he answered simply, pausing only until she requested he continue. He could not know what she had been through – for he had not been there for her, as he had promised. Deirdre and Emaleth had likely burned with Donnelaith, and in his grief, he had also let Aria down. He felt the rise of regret form in his throat – a sense of nausea causing him to blink as he looked away briefly. “You were the his co-Alpha – so it fell on your shoulders to take the full lead when he passed. For some reason you never felt confident in your position – this was when we became friends.” He paused then, glancing back to her now. “I think you felt overshadowed by all of us – my younger sisters, especially Deirdre.. and myself. I think you felt as if the pack was meant to be one of ours.”
 
“Deirdre probably didn’t help this. She has..” He stopped, feeling the rawness in his throat as he realized his error. “Had a good heart, but she overstepped herself a lot. She was young – not even a year old.” Shifting his weight then, Constantine settled himself to his haunches, trying to maintain the illusion of calm, though within he realized he did not want to relieve these memories. Not anymore.
 
“It was then we found out that a newcomer – by the name of Rowan – claimed to be pregnant with my late father’s pups. This upset you greatly.” Now, when he reflected back on it, he wasn’t sure why – never would he know the reason had been that Lasher had been a lover to her. “I wasn’t sure she was telling the truth – and together, we asked her to leave. I made to escort her to Silver Creek, where my brother resided, but she wanted nothing to do with me after that and slipped away. Casmir, my brother, came to our borders shortly after in a rage. He denounced our family ties.” Casmir had tried to talk to him afterward – months after, too little too late.. and Constantine had allowed his brother to drift away. Casmir, with his short temper and ability to simply cut those beloved out of his life without blinking.. Constantine had not been willing to continue a close relationship with him.
 
“It was when Deirdre went ahead and gave Donnelaith’s allegiance to a pack that looked to settle right at our borders in the adjacent territory that I think things truly spiralled – without permission, she had promised them aide for their injured should they ever require it in return for their protection. Finally, at a pack meeting, when we suggested we try to train some of our pack mates for battle – self defense if they ever required it – Deirdre assumed we meant to become a pack of soldiers, and basically said we were dishonouring Donnelaith and all he had built.” He shook his head, releasing a soft sigh. Deirdre had been passionate about her beliefs – and she had refused to listen to what they had been actually trying to say.
 
“That was when you fully felt the pack was not yours to lead, and so you relinquished your title to Deirdre, as she had made it known to you that she wished to lead with you one day. You, myself and my littermate Eilidh branched away from Donnelaith then – promising to remain close but having the intention of establishing a pack and home we felt aligned closer to our own beliefs. Winter came and we never managed to find enough to establish – so we joined a pack southeast from here called Moonspear. You had a friend there by the name of Floki..” He trailed off, allowing the trace of a smile to cast itself wryly on his lips. “I never found the pack overly welcoming. When I went to go visit Donnelaith and see how Deirdre and Emaleth were.. it had been ruined by fire. There were no signs of them.. it was just gone.” His eyes then directed fully to her, studying her, wondering if anything he had said had stirred any sort of memory or feeling within. “I couldn’t.. go back. I couldn’t stay. So I left. I’m sorry. I thought you were safe with Floki. I think you loved him.”

He fell silent then, waiting for her to respond -- for anything. But as the seconds ticked past, and there was no response, he wondered if he had overwhelmed her once more. Inclining his muzzle gently, he gave a nod. "If you need more answers, I can try.. but for now, you should settle yourself in. Rest. Process everything." He paused for only a moment more, but then, with one last final glance, he began to lope away, allowing her some time to herself.