Tormented Tarns antifreeze

Did you know the little spiders, they uh, yeah it's such a funny story! They, yeah, YES! How did you know? Said Tristan to no one in particular in the dead of night atop the center of a frozen pond. Maybe he spoke to the hidden stars, or the tiny flecks of snow slowly drifting from the sky, or maybe the air itself.

His one-sided conversation revved up again like a Bugati in the void. A family of spiders invited me over for supper. I can't recall what we ate, it was too tiny for me to really see or taste. Gnats maybe? Anyway, Grandpa Spider sat us all down for stories afterwards. It was me and THOUSANDS of his children and children's children. They used me as a cushion, I didn't like that part too much but I was so engrossed by Grandpa's tales it was ok. At one point while spinning tales he took it to a whole other LITERAL level and started pulling silk out his rear-end, making little figurines to go along with his stories, and handing them to the youngest spider babies. Their eyes, I swear it was millions of eyes all together, shined so brightly with joy I couldn't help but shed a tear. I mean, what a legend. Anyway, so yeah, that's how I learned what I learned about spiders. He quieted for a moment, ears pricked and moving about as if listening intently to the silence.

Tristan nodded slightly and averted his gaze suddenly to the tree tops in the near distance, Yeah, lookit those webs shining with ice. So many of them. So many spiders full of antifreeze. Stay strong little buddies. Grandpa Spider, if you're out there, fat with antifreeze, I hope you're having a beautiful winter surrounded by eager listeners.

The young wolf seemed to be done speaking to whoever it was he spoke to, and quiet once again reigned over the Tormented Tarns.