Moonspear southern gothic

Gaze downcast and eyes blinking rapidly, the tears were forced back and out of her eyes; she did not want to cry, she was so tired of crying, but what else was there to do? She could not help it, often doing so when even she did not realise it, or when asleep and unable to gather control over her own body. The sorrow gnawed away at her piece by piece, gradually stripping her of her former self and leaving behind hardly even a shell; she was a cheerful child once, curious and eager to learn. She used to engage her dear brother in play and even sometimes confused herself for her wayward twin sister when trying to think quickly. This was not her, not the wolf she was born to be. Yet, it was who she was becoming, slowly but surely and dreadfully.

I am here for you, sister.

Her lips quivered and tail tucked tightly between her thighs, uncertainty seeping into the whirlpool of emotions already circling in her head. She wanted to say that she didn’t want her to be there, that she was fine, but her tongue would speak not even one more lie. Shoulders slumped forward and ears flattened against her head, dreading the idea of saying what she knew she should; Yama knew she should explain herself, that she should seek help and begin healing, but would healing mean forgetting? She thought of Dirge and what he had told her, of the conversation they’d had and of everything she had shared. She remembered that talking about it—about them—had felt good, it had offered her some peace of mind, yet she found herself unable to speak as freely with her own sister.

“You don’t have to be,” said the girl instead, avoiding everything that she shouldn’t. “Your… your babies need you more. They need you to be there for them, not me.” Would pushing her away make her feel better? Would ignoring that which she should confront magically heal her? Deep down, she knew the answers to those questions but refused to accept them. She would much rather follow the telling of her own fabrications, deeming those fallacious thoughts as indisputable truths.