April 23, 2014, 03:59 PM
(This post was last modified: April 23, 2014, 04:01 PM by Ferdie Von Pelt.)
@Jace sorry this was all I could pull from my brute, I have some many other idea's floating around in my head
Ferdie Von Pelt solemnly lead the way to his den, there would by peace and quiet to speak to Jace, Bazi was not likely to return until late that night, she would likely want to investigate the coyotes thoroughly.
The Clouds began to seep in and fill the sky with a boding inky grey, setting the mood just perfect Ferdie thought, for this was not a conversation he wanted to have, but it was one his mother had with him. Why, were wolves plagued with a heart that could be light or dark but torn when it was both.
The brute turned and sat waiting for Jace to draw closer, not a word said yet. His own heart ached to see a wolf plagued by the dark heart gene. Clearly this wolf was like not unlike himself, probably born of a light and Dark Wolf. Where did Jace come from would have to be answered among other questions. When Jace finally got close enough Ferdie would speak without prompting
”How long has your heart known this dark ache” He looked for Jace eyes not for dominance or submission but to see the truth within them, eye were the windows to the soul and Ferdie wanted to know if Jace’s soul would ruin them all.
Jace looked at him the red tinge gone from his eyes. "You saw my eyes. it was not a question merely a statement of a fact. He tilted his head and studied the older male in front of him. What could he say to him, he was born this way, a child of the night his father called him. he had no idea what to say so he just began from the beginning.
"I do not want you to judge him, based on what I tell you. It hurt him deeply to start to talk about his father, his father tried so hard to survive his past and it felt like a deep betrayal to talk about it without him being present but being that Ferdie was a pack mate he deserved to know.
My father is Wildheart Shadowsinger. His entire life he was bred for war, his right of passage when he was a yearling was to save his sister and her pups from a bobcat on his own. The only way for him to do that was to go into a blind rage and thus the darkness was born. Not only was that part of it but he was forced to couple with the alpha who was as dark as dark implies and she used him in so many ways tortured him by using his family and his sister against him. He was an elite assassin to the alpha's guard in this pack. He went on raids he was forced to do unspeakable horrors and the only way for him to do this was to go to a dark place and be a berserk. He felt no pain, he could not see what he was doing and he saved his sister it was the lesser of two evils and rather than be split from it he could not remember it so he used it. He learned to control it and he could slip into it at random moments. He's a good man though regardless. Myself I was just born this way, he taught me to control it, how to use it. I try to hide it because most do not understand. Jace then looked up and blinked a little ashamed of himself, he could not control the fact that he had this, but it was hard all the same to admit to being flawed and it was a flaw. He was not right not normal something was broken inside him he knew how his father felt as he felt it too all his life.
"I do not want you to judge him, based on what I tell you. It hurt him deeply to start to talk about his father, his father tried so hard to survive his past and it felt like a deep betrayal to talk about it without him being present but being that Ferdie was a pack mate he deserved to know.
My father is Wildheart Shadowsinger. His entire life he was bred for war, his right of passage when he was a yearling was to save his sister and her pups from a bobcat on his own. The only way for him to do that was to go into a blind rage and thus the darkness was born. Not only was that part of it but he was forced to couple with the alpha who was as dark as dark implies and she used him in so many ways tortured him by using his family and his sister against him. He was an elite assassin to the alpha's guard in this pack. He went on raids he was forced to do unspeakable horrors and the only way for him to do this was to go to a dark place and be a berserk. He felt no pain, he could not see what he was doing and he saved his sister it was the lesser of two evils and rather than be split from it he could not remember it so he used it. He learned to control it and he could slip into it at random moments. He's a good man though regardless. Myself I was just born this way, he taught me to control it, how to use it. I try to hide it because most do not understand. Jace then looked up and blinked a little ashamed of himself, he could not control the fact that he had this, but it was hard all the same to admit to being flawed and it was a flaw. He was not right not normal something was broken inside him he knew how his father felt as he felt it too all his life.
April 23, 2014, 08:45 PM
First Jace, know that you are not alone. Ferdie’s hair all stood on end then, he never admitted to any expect when he slept talked, and even then the wolf should not have been there to over hear,
My Father was a dark wolf, My mother a captive light, in my heart beats the same darkness, it threatens to over take; it will always want out and when, not IF, it takes over you can hurt even the ones you love. You are a brute and it’s best you not forget that.
Ferdie stood and circled the brute just one as if inspecting him. He sat down in front of Jace and continued ”I can not say what your father did was right or wrong, for what ever reasons he did those dark things, he allowed it to take hold, it’s a poison, harder and harder to get away from. Tis a fools errand to try and control it that alone will destroy you.”
Ferdie curled his tail around himself not sure if Jace was going to accept this. I would like to teach you more boy, but learning how to move past this darkness opens you up to pain that can threaten to swallow you back up into the darkness twice fold
Ferdie closed his eyes, he knew he was dabbling toward the darkness again, his pain great, this was why Lecter couldn’t understand or help him. If Ferdie didn’t straighten up he was going to lose himself.
That is why he became obsessed with pups, with innocence there was only light, Wolves who didn’t want to succumb to the darkness held onto those rays of light, like his father did, Like he did... But they must work harder then other wolves not to taint that light; that divine innocence.
My Father was a dark wolf, My mother a captive light, in my heart beats the same darkness, it threatens to over take; it will always want out and when, not IF, it takes over you can hurt even the ones you love. You are a brute and it’s best you not forget that.
Ferdie stood and circled the brute just one as if inspecting him. He sat down in front of Jace and continued ”I can not say what your father did was right or wrong, for what ever reasons he did those dark things, he allowed it to take hold, it’s a poison, harder and harder to get away from. Tis a fools errand to try and control it that alone will destroy you.”
Ferdie curled his tail around himself not sure if Jace was going to accept this. I would like to teach you more boy, but learning how to move past this darkness opens you up to pain that can threaten to swallow you back up into the darkness twice fold
Ferdie closed his eyes, he knew he was dabbling toward the darkness again, his pain great, this was why Lecter couldn’t understand or help him. If Ferdie didn’t straighten up he was going to lose himself.
That is why he became obsessed with pups, with innocence there was only light, Wolves who didn’t want to succumb to the darkness held onto those rays of light, like his father did, Like he did... But they must work harder then other wolves not to taint that light; that divine innocence.
April 23, 2014, 09:13 PM
Jace listened and saw the fur rise on his pack mates neck and he sighed, You are this way too?Jace tilted his head and studied the wolf in front of him.
Jace let him speak his piece before he interrupted him his father had already told him all this he knew very well that he could hurt those he loved and he knew it would never go away. "I know that Ferdie my father told me as well. I know it will never go away and I know that I am a savage and that it will not end I won't forget it believe me. He knew all to well the pain he could inflict having hurt his own sister one time when he was little and that was when they had known.
Being the way Jace was and how much he revered his father he spoke sharper than he intended "My father did those things to protect his sister the one light in his darkness. She was always kept under guard he could not get her away so he did what he could to alleviate her suffering. She was his light and he would tell you that if he stood before you now. He rather be the darkness than let her light be snuffed out. My father tried to control it so he would not hurt anymore. The darkness weighs heavier on him than either you or I could even fathom Ferdie. My father is no fool. Jace was no trying to cause conflict, and he really did appreciate the older male talking to him,but he did not like any bad things said about his father a male who had overcome much in his life.
Jace's own father was obsessed with pups for the same reasons their innocence outshined any and all darkness and he would not let anyone snuff it out. Jace had seen his father take on a fully grown cougar to protect a pup and he knew he would do it again.
Jace let him speak his piece before he interrupted him his father had already told him all this he knew very well that he could hurt those he loved and he knew it would never go away. "I know that Ferdie my father told me as well. I know it will never go away and I know that I am a savage and that it will not end I won't forget it believe me. He knew all to well the pain he could inflict having hurt his own sister one time when he was little and that was when they had known.
Being the way Jace was and how much he revered his father he spoke sharper than he intended "My father did those things to protect his sister the one light in his darkness. She was always kept under guard he could not get her away so he did what he could to alleviate her suffering. She was his light and he would tell you that if he stood before you now. He rather be the darkness than let her light be snuffed out. My father tried to control it so he would not hurt anymore. The darkness weighs heavier on him than either you or I could even fathom Ferdie. My father is no fool. Jace was no trying to cause conflict, and he really did appreciate the older male talking to him,but he did not like any bad things said about his father a male who had overcome much in his life.
Jace's own father was obsessed with pups for the same reasons their innocence outshined any and all darkness and he would not let anyone snuff it out. Jace had seen his father take on a fully grown cougar to protect a pup and he knew he would do it again.
April 23, 2014, 09:40 PM
(This post was last modified: April 24, 2014, 07:07 AM by Ferdie Von Pelt.)
Ferdie snorted offended "I never said he was a fool Jace, quite the opposite, I said trying to control and suppress it was a fools errand" He stared at Jace his ears perked forward saying without saying it; that he believed it was jace chasing this 'errand' His father had done what his father could. Ferdie did not commend his father for his actions but he did not disgrace his father either. Their kind needed a light to follow to give their loyalty and love to without that their worlds would crumble, [size=x-small]just like Ferdie's was[/size]
Ferdie turned his head, his voice lower "I used to be..." he barely murmured The queen was my light" The brute closed his eyes emotions threatened to consume him, but as any typical male he would not cry for his loss.
Slowly Ferdie turned his head toward the young wolf before him, He cleared his throat and looked directly at the deep colored brute's face and questioned him quietly "Are you done being a fool Jace?" He decided being blunt was the way to get through to the ebony male.
The young brute's father was a touchy subject, and touchy subject's Ferdie knew all to well, but he also knew that the father was not going to be Jace's light the source to help drive away this 'dark'
Dark was the only way for a simple minded brute like Ferdie to explain it.
Ferdie turned his head, his voice lower "I used to be..." he barely murmured The queen was my light" The brute closed his eyes emotions threatened to consume him, but as any typical male he would not cry for his loss.
Slowly Ferdie turned his head toward the young wolf before him, He cleared his throat and looked directly at the deep colored brute's face and questioned him quietly "Are you done being a fool Jace?" He decided being blunt was the way to get through to the ebony male.
The young brute's father was a touchy subject, and touchy subject's Ferdie knew all to well, but he also knew that the father was not going to be Jace's light the source to help drive away this 'dark'
Dark was the only way for a simple minded brute like Ferdie to explain it.
added a touch, the writers block is still smothering me
April 24, 2014, 11:55 PM
Jace stared at him and said quietly "But you need to control it you don't want to hurt someone. I know you can't always and that is why I try and stay away from others when it starts to come upon me. That is also why i try very hard to not be angry. What else could I do but that Ferdie?
Jace looked at him and sighed "I am sorry about that Ferdie, my sister was mine. He missed his sister a lot and she was indeed a bright spot in his life and she still would be if he was near her, but they had 100's of mile between them now.
Jace looked at him and sighed "I am sorry about that Ferdie, my sister was mine. He missed his sister a lot and she was indeed a bright spot in his life and she still would be if he was near her, but they had 100's of mile between them now.
April 25, 2014, 11:09 AM
Ferdie shook his head just slightly his voice ominous You can't control it. The more you try the harder it fights back. Soon you'll lose yourself to it. Wolves like us... we need a light. a wolf a cause to be 100% wholly loyal to.
One that we can think about when we are in a situation where we need to fight."
Ferdie shifted uncomfortably, he did not want to bombard this brute with to much, to much information and Jace to use the point of the whole 'lesson'
"First Wolves like us, should not be Warriors but defenders, Wardens they are called here, Being a Warden and Defending our 'light' will give your heart the strength to not allow that which seeks to take over. "
Ferdie huffed he felt a bit like harry potter talking about 'he who should not be named' what ever harry potter was to a wolf, Ferdie had never told anyone that that bastard 'non-wolf' had turned him human and nor would he that was a long story and not one to be told around here, in jest or not.
You scare me most Jace because you currently do not have a light to protect, it would be to easy to lose yourself, when you fight instead of fighting what you are fighting and fighting yourself think about defending your love and each attack will easier to make, don't fight the dark drown it in your love for her... or the pack what ever you choose to give yourself to."
Ferdie swallowed and steeled himself "But let me tell you for this to work you need to open your heart and let them in, love wholly and never give up on them. your loyalty to them and their cause is something you have to be invested in.
That is why I never left until I has nearly dead. That is why I didn't kill the neutral wolf, because that would have hurt her. I could have stopped the fall of the mountain but she didn't want me to hurt him, so I didn't, I was true to her. I lost her and so, myself.
Ferdie tipped his head You will find it easier to think about defending your light then fighting the dark and the dark will came around less and less when you defend your light. you can defeat your dark and long as you have light. Do you have a light Jace can we build on this?
One that we can think about when we are in a situation where we need to fight."
Ferdie shifted uncomfortably, he did not want to bombard this brute with to much, to much information and Jace to use the point of the whole 'lesson'
"First Wolves like us, should not be Warriors but defenders, Wardens they are called here, Being a Warden and Defending our 'light' will give your heart the strength to not allow that which seeks to take over. "
Ferdie huffed he felt a bit like harry potter talking about 'he who should not be named' what ever harry potter was to a wolf, Ferdie had never told anyone that that bastard 'non-wolf' had turned him human and nor would he that was a long story and not one to be told around here, in jest or not.
You scare me most Jace because you currently do not have a light to protect, it would be to easy to lose yourself, when you fight instead of fighting what you are fighting and fighting yourself think about defending your love and each attack will easier to make, don't fight the dark drown it in your love for her... or the pack what ever you choose to give yourself to."
Ferdie swallowed and steeled himself "But let me tell you for this to work you need to open your heart and let them in, love wholly and never give up on them. your loyalty to them and their cause is something you have to be invested in.
That is why I never left until I has nearly dead. That is why I didn't kill the neutral wolf, because that would have hurt her. I could have stopped the fall of the mountain but she didn't want me to hurt him, so I didn't, I was true to her. I lost her and so, myself.
Ferdie tipped his head You will find it easier to think about defending your light then fighting the dark and the dark will came around less and less when you defend your light. you can defeat your dark and long as you have light. Do you have a light Jace can we build on this?
These two will need to spar eventually. :D
April 25, 2014, 01:34 PM
Of course though my sparring skills are a tad rusty okay more than a tad but still lol
Jace listened in a sense his father had already told him this, though not as in much depth, or maybe he had not listened well enough, he was not sure. He had tried to listen but he had been young and eager to begin his life and his journeys.
Jace looked at him and nodded "I do not wish to be a warrior, and Fox told me we have enough wardens that I am to focus on my other skill sets such as my knowledge building or my hunting. But I fear that if i do not do those things if i do not defend that my anger will build and become combustible.
Jace listened and shook his head "I do not have a light anymore Ferdie my sister is not here and I do not know the pack well enough yet to be completely ingrained. Jace did not know what else to say, he felt upset and stubborn and his pelt felt itchy and too small for his evergrowing shoulders. He was slowly realizing that his body mass was going to rival even his fathers and that made him a little nervous as well. He was indeed a brute and what would happen if he came unhinged.
Jace listened in a sense his father had already told him this, though not as in much depth, or maybe he had not listened well enough, he was not sure. He had tried to listen but he had been young and eager to begin his life and his journeys.
Jace looked at him and nodded "I do not wish to be a warrior, and Fox told me we have enough wardens that I am to focus on my other skill sets such as my knowledge building or my hunting. But I fear that if i do not do those things if i do not defend that my anger will build and become combustible.
Jace listened and shook his head "I do not have a light anymore Ferdie my sister is not here and I do not know the pack well enough yet to be completely ingrained. Jace did not know what else to say, he felt upset and stubborn and his pelt felt itchy and too small for his evergrowing shoulders. He was slowly realizing that his body mass was going to rival even his fathers and that made him a little nervous as well. He was indeed a brute and what would happen if he came unhinged.
April 25, 2014, 06:38 PM
(This post was last modified: April 25, 2014, 06:42 PM by Ferdie Von Pelt.)
I have only ever spared though paragraph style fighting so this will be interesting indeed
You need to find one Jace, as do I... Time is ticking out for me. Ferdie worried about loosing himself. Brute's like he and Jace could end up something like that Sitri wolf, way to easy. Ferdie grimaced
Ahh but with the split I think most of our Warden's left if I remember correctly there is but one official Warden left now.
Either way, we both need to find our 'Light' here in this land, and we should not delay. Our hearts are meant to be loyal and beat for our soul mates.
Next time you are forced to fight instead of holding back and fighting 'it'
Think of protecting those you are truly trying to protect in the moment, like we were trying to Protect Bazi, and Fox, Think about whom you are protecting as you snap your teeth, don't fight while holding back you'll break
Ferdie Von Pelt circled once then and lay down; his empty stomach gnawed at him, but he was done talking for now he had nothing else to offer just yet, he closed his eyes and leveled his breathing.
Before dismissing Jace he spoke more in three days you and I will go to the sparing pit,
April 26, 2014, 11:23 AM
me as well I have only used paragraph style.
Jace tilted his head and said quietly "What about Bazi for you Ferdie. You obviously are fond of her in a fatherly way or Fox? Jace was trying to help the older male as he tried to help him.
Jace titled his head Are you sure you should spar Ferdie? I am not blind something obviously pains you. Jace would not spar with him if there was a possibility that he could hurt him worse he refused to do that.
Jace tilted his head and said quietly "What about Bazi for you Ferdie. You obviously are fond of her in a fatherly way or Fox? Jace was trying to help the older male as he tried to help him.
Jace titled his head Are you sure you should spar Ferdie? I am not blind something obviously pains you. Jace would not spar with him if there was a possibility that he could hurt him worse he refused to do that.
April 28, 2014, 06:03 AM
(This post was last modified: April 28, 2014, 07:43 PM by Ferdie Von Pelt.)
so this will be a great learning lesson for the both of us, wahoo, I will feel less embarrassed if we are both learning.
Ferdie's breathing remained level and his eyes were closed, whither he was purposely making his breath level or he was actually alseep would be unclear, but he wasn't about to answer that last question even if he heard it. He had his own ego to protect too.
April 30, 2014, 11:04 AM
Me too
Jace saw the other male looking as if he was falling asleep. He smiled noticing the ploy for what it was, the male was sneaky at times, but he was growing on the youth. SLeep well Ferdie. He spoke quietly and with a small snort he turned and loped away, feeling lighter than he had in days.
EXIT JACE
Jace saw the other male looking as if he was falling asleep. He smiled noticing the ploy for what it was, the male was sneaky at times, but he was growing on the youth. SLeep well Ferdie. He spoke quietly and with a small snort he turned and loped away, feeling lighter than he had in days.
EXIT JACE
I am more easily attainable for threads now. But please do bear in mind that I have three children under the age of five at home. And they do take up a lot of my time.
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »