Blacktail Deer Plateau desire in violent overture

It is how you come to see the change that influences the outcome. Osprey furrowed her brow, letting this simple truth sink in. It was true that she was standing before a very big change - her life no matter the outcome would never be the same. She didn't feel prepared to begin a new chapter in her life, when it felt like there was still so much to write and do in this one. She could not picture the future, because this one scary event was blocking the way and - no matter, what she tried - she couldn't find a way around it.


Lasher spoke about his and Blue willow's arrangement and, how their kids would be considered as bastards by some. Osprey had never considered it to be like that. If Dante had decided not to continue his bloodline then it was the right of those, who stood next to him in the ranks. The decision of betas' had been a thorough one, both had known, what they were getting into. They had been sure of where they stood in their lives and, what their wanted. Their situation was like a book, written neatly, with a well-outlined plot, a bit predictable - yes - but everything was thought through and through.

Osprey's in comparison had a rambly story written in messy handwriting, with blotches of ink and dirty fingerprints here and there, doodles on the edges and dog-eared pages. "Lasher, you didn't mess with a stranger and walk away without a second thought. I don't care about that fellow - not in the least," true, looking back it even seemed a bit odd that she had got so far and so quickly with him. "Do you think desperation for being desired and loved just like everyone else is a good reason to do that? I was selfish and had I cared more about this pack and, what could happen next, I would have stayed within the lines," but she had not. She had thrown her sanity out of the window and immersed herself in the madness of that moment.

"So, don't draw parallels with your and Blue willow's lives and mine. There is no need to make me better, when I was... am not, and your actions less justifiable than they really were. I admire you two for settling your lives the way that make you both happy and I only wish I would have been patient enough to wait for my turn to come," she fell silent. Who was to tell now, what it could have been. "I never wished to have children, not like this. And it scares me that, when they are born I won't feel any different. Do you think it is fair for any kid to grow up not loved and liked? To be only endured?" You couldn't say that she hated the kids, that she blamed them for anything other than choosing the wrong person to be with. Yet she didn't feel any glee or happiness for that either. Too much uncertainty for her to look in the future with hope.