Stone Circle wake up alone

Cold. Frozen through and through. Since the altercation, Belle had become captured in her own pain, both inside and out. The waters were beginning to fall to hypothermic levels, and yet that morning in which Belle dove violently into the current to snatch the largest fish that still remained, her own demise was the last thing on her mind. Beside her a pile was growing (three? Four? She'd lost count after her paws lost feeling) and her lunges were becoming more violent.
She had so much anger flowing within and yet still was it masked with fear. The period of time between the altercation and that set morning had been one of avoidance toward all of her packmates via hiding out in her den. Being away from home, half of her hoped that she would be found.

He was looking for Adeline, truthfully. Now that he'd spoken to her again, it seemed like she was always on his mind. It wasn't true, of course - he thought of the kids more than anything, and of Amber at a close second - but guilt was a powerful thing, and the times he lost himself in thoughts of Addie always stuck out like sore thumbs in his mind.

Didn't keep him from looking for her, but it seemed that it wouldn't matter either way. What he found was Mirabelle, dunking her head into the icy river.

"Hey," he called, his voice sharp in his worry. He'd heard the commotion the other night, but Steady's voice had been in the mix, and then Valette's and Chaska's, and he thought they were all enough to deal with it. He'd gotten up and half-paced toward the sounds, but the voices were soon broken up, and Day had padded back to the mouth of the den to lay himself across it once more. Steady and Val could deal with whatever was going on, and another set of paws underfoot would probably just trip them up.

But this - Day had no problem dealing with this. "Whattaya think you're doin?" he demanded, moving to her side and tsking lightly. "It's freezing, Belle - you'll catch your death dunking your head in the river. You never been through a winter before?"

His voice was half scolding and half pleading. He wanted her to stop - there was something strange about the way she moved, the scent of her fur. "Are you okay?" he asked, softer now. Was she hurt?

She jumped back at the sound of Day's approach, but quickly regained herself and scoffed at his concern. And you're so concerned because...? It was a snarky remark, as per usual, but her voice trembled as she made it. Another dive into the water, yet this time she forgot to hold her breath and sucked in the freezing water. Agh! she called, falling back on her haunches and shaking her head desperately.
Once the burning subsided, she lowered her paw and stared down at them both for a moment. I'm sorry, she whispered, her voice meeting a crack halfway through. I just...I had to occupy myself for a while. I know it was dumb, Belle turned to meet his eyes, but I just...I had to do something right. She cleared her throat and took in a deep breath before continuing, Don't feel obligated to be here. I know we aren't exactly the best of friends, so if you want to go then that's fine.

A frustrated breath huffed past his lips when he received snark in response to his initial question - but the male figured that was fair, he hadn't been very polite with his inquiry. His heart hammered when she dove into the water once more and came up gasping this time, but at least it seemed to make room for some sense in that head of hers.

Some.

"Something right?" Day hedged, moving closer and hoveirng uselessly. He wanted to groom her, wick some of the moisture away, but he didn't know if that would help, at this point. It was cold and the fur around her head and neck was slick with water. It didn't bode well, in his opinion. He wanted to yell some more, agree with her assesment of herself - but then, Day knew something about feeling useless, worrying that he wasn't doing anything right. It could lead a wolf to stupid things, and Day knew he'd been sillier in his youth. Had left home and family for feelings like these.

"Y'ain't dumb," he muttered, ignoring the last part of he words. They could argue all day about obligation - what mattered was that he wanted to be here, even if it was only because she was pack. "C'mon, come away from the water," he said, turning away from the river himself. He didn't know where she lived, but there was a hollow near enough where she could dry off, get herself warmed up.

Was she really about to expose herself to him? Share with Day the most personal anxieties which plagued her, night and day? It would seem so, though the poor femme wouldn't be able to explain why. I just...everything I do is wrong, I mean, I can't even hold a conversation properly! Belle scoffed at her whispered testimony but quickly continued, and it's always been that way, you know? I just...I don't think. When I do think, I think too much, and then I fuck up even more and it's become such a sick cycle; I just can't stop it.
She gulped but twisted her shivering frame so that her eyes met Day's. When he beckoned for her to come away from the water, Belle complied, moving her heavy weight wherever he asked. She didn't like being so dependent, but in that moment, Day was just what she needed.

He turned her words over in his head as they made their way the short distance to the clearing - just far enough that the river was no longer a constant sound in his ears. The fact that he could still hear it made him nervous, now. He felt as if they ought to go futher. As if Mirabelle would hear it and remember that she'd been trying to drown herself. As if she might get up and dash off and finish the job before he could say don't.

Day might not have gotten off on the right paw with her, but he certainly didn't want her to die. And he might never like her the way he did most of the rest of his packmates, but he didn't agree so much with her words, either. Maybe she was a terrible conversationist and maybe she was a fuck-up (he would reserve judgement on that), but no wolf could do everything wrong. And Day still didn't like her, but right then, hearing her plight, her insecurities -

He loved her, right then. Just a little bit.

"You need to get yourself dry," he said, choosing not to speak on her words just yet. He didn't know what to say about that, but he knew they'd both be able to think a helluva lot clearer when she wasn't in danger of freezing to death. Day sat down and splayed his front legs wide, leaving room for her to approach - displaying that he was available to help in that endeavor, if she needed it.

With her teeth chattering and gnawing against the inside of her lips, Belle took Day's offer and gently moved forward, resting against his palette of fur. A few deep breaths were sucked in through her maw as she quietly whimpered to herself. She was pathetic; nothing more than a shell of the woman she once was. It was Steady who'd reminded her of the cruel rule of superiors and their ruthless intent, though if it did anything else, it made her respect him. Still, she'd taken a complete turn from the once proud and boastful Mirabelle Gautier to just another subordinate under a higher rank's paw.
I don't want to hurt any of you, she whispered, but I think hurting others is all I'm good at.

Day gave a short sigh of relief as Mirabelle's compliance continued. He'd never known her to be so submissive, and to see her in such a way put him on-edge for some reason. It just wasn't natural.

Still, he began to groom the water out of her fur, offering his own body heat while she dried. If only everything weren't so damp, he'd ask her to roll in the dirt to get the water out. Better to be dirty than wet in this weather, but it didn't seem like they had a choice.

"Tell me what you mean, Belle," he said firmly, feeling a chill of his own as she spoke again. He had hurt someone? If she had, he'd take her to Steady at once, but he wanted to be sure before he brought her before the (often volatile) alpha. And, as he groomed her, he began to see that she had been hurt as well.

She stepped back from his grip for a moment, gently eyeing him before looking down at her own paws and falling back into his embrace. It was unlike Belle to be so open, so vulnerable, but she felt that she had no other option. He asked her to explain further, but she wasn't sure if she knew how. I mean..., she began, I'm talking about my presence. It just seems that wherever I go, I bring nothing but anger and angst and, I don't know; I'm just not good for others. It was part of why she liked to spend her time alone. There was a part of her, hidden beneath the rough and cold exterior, that was afraid of what she could do. Part of Belle was still a child, afraid to take each step forward.
I already said that you don't have to be here, let alone help me get dry again but...well, I guess my question is why haven't you left yet? I know that no one here is keen on spending time with me, especially not you. So why do you care? It wasn't meant to sound as cold as it did, for Belle was nothing more than a broken woman with her mind boggled in the mystery of life. She just wanted to be reassured that she was doing okay.

Day let out a soft, huffy sigh, mulling over her words and how familiar they sounded. He'd struggled with similar feelings in the past - still struggled with them at times, if he was being honest with himself. Sometimes a wolf's mind could be his - or her - worst enemy.

His grooming paused as he struggled to form a response, but he remained near to the shewolf, protective. No matter how he felt, she was still pack - but that wasn't the answer she needed right then.

"Y'know, when I first joined this pack, I spent months on the outskirts, never feeling like I was fitting in," he told her, not shy about sharing this with his pack. Most of them knew it well enough already. "It takes time to adjust sometimes. It takes time to get to know everyone, and it takes time for them to get to know you. I don't know you yet, but I would like to," he said, and he was surprised that it was not a lie, "And that's why I'm still here."

Belle relaxed into Day's embrace as he soothed her with his words of wisdom. That and the fact that the cold was really starting to get at her skin, and Day seemed the nearest source of warmth. I would like to get to know you, too. Her eyes opened a bit and she pulled away to clarify, On a friendly level, though. As Belle doubted that needed clarification, she gave a lighthearted smile and laughed softly as if to signify that she was joking (which she totally wasn't, but she didn't want to ruin the mood).

Day rolled his eyes at her last quip, thinking that it was just like her to need to have the final word. This no longer bothered him, per se, but he couldn't help but reply: "You should be so lucky," giving her shoulder a few firm licks to soften the joke, should she find it harsh. In all honesty, though, Day had enough experience with moody women under his belt to know that he wouldn't be seeking any kind of romance with Mirabelle. They could be friends, but other than that, the woman was a headache waiting to happen. 

"Come on - let's get you out of the weather until you dry off. And try to stay dry, huh?"

Archive?

Belle smiled and nodded her head silently. She gave a soft nudge back to Day and shook her pelt free of whatever moisture it still held, though she remained chilled to the bone. Regardless, her heart was warm (like, three degrees warmer) and that was what mattered.