Redhawk Caldera deer might fly, why not? i met you.

Oh maaaaaaaaaate! @Elwood

Finley had an idea.  It was probably a terrible one, as they so often tended to be.  But...  Despite her own improvements in the past few weeks and the great strides her relationship with her mate had taken, there was still one piece of their little family that didn't seem quite.. right.  Though his neediness had subsided somewhat, her son remained just as child-like and immature as ever.  He also seemed... sad.  Though that wasn't quite the word for it.  Detached?  Or just... Not whole.  It pained the mother to see, and it made her feel all the more like she had failed him.

But, she had finally accepted that she was all he would ever have in terms of a mother.  And since she loved him just like any mother should, she set out that afternoon to seek her mate with the intent of discussing the boy.  Fin wasn't exactly certain where to find him.  The borders of the packlands seemed to be a decent enough guess as to where to start, so she cantered quickly off to start her hunt.

<33333

Finley was right in assuming that she would find Elwood near the borders. With the onset of winter, he spent more time there, on the lookout for any wayward scavengers. The colder weather would bring out the desperation in wolves and other creatures alike, and he knew it was important to protect their claim and their caches.

Luckily, he hadn't come across any disturbances (in the force *swings lightsaber*) and the sight of Finley approaching was a welcome one. She was the only living being that he had seen in the last couple of hours, and he woofed as she made her way towards him, gliding across the soft layer of snow. It filled him with warmth to see her out and about and looking like her old self.

"What are you up to?" he called out once she was within earshot, his tail swaying through the air behind him.

Thankfully, it didn't take Finley too long to find her mate.  She had guessed right starting at the borders having quickly located a recent trail and dashing along it until she spotted him.  Her tail wagged as she came to him, partly out of joy to see him but moreso in the joy at not feeling a sense of dread in being in his presence.  It was a bizarre thing to be happy about considering it was her own mate, but... you'd have to be Fin to get it.

"Looking for you, of course!" Fin chirped as she trotted up to him, tapping the tip of her nose lightly against his before giving it a gentle lick.  "I wanted to run my terrible idea by you," she told him a second later, fixing him with a perfectly serious look so that he would know she wasn't kidding.  Well.  Not entirely kidding.

She approached him with a spring in her step and a playful lilt to her voice. He could even see that there was a familiar sparkle in her eye -- something that hadn't been apparent for far too long. Elwood smiled as Finley touched her nose to his, then raised his brows and looked down at her with curiosity. Most of her ideas were terrible, to an extent, but he was particularly interested to hear what she had up her sleeve this time.

"Okay, tell me," he said, simultaneously rocking back onto his haunches as he spoke.

*pokes thread towards present day maybe* >___>

The moment he encouraged her to tell him, Fin began to completely doubt herself.  There was no way that Elwood was going to approve of this.  Even bringing it up would probably cause tension, and they had come so far to move past what Finley now referred to her in her mind as the "unfortunate incident".  But, she had already brought it up, and she wasn't feeling particularly clever enough to come up with some other terrible idea she could spit out as though it was what she'd intended to say all along.  So...

"I think I should take Eljay ranging with me," she blurted finally, then grit her teeth and flinched away from him as though she expected him to rage at her for suggesting something so stupid - which she did expect, for the record.  She had reasons for thinking it would be a good idea, but for the moment she held them back until she saw how he reacted to the first bit.

<3

Before the incident, Elwood might have been more receptive to Finley's idea. She was an accomplished outrider and she was good at what she did; scouting and adventuring were in her blood. But her fall had produced so many unexpected repercussions that he could hardly tolerate the idea of her going exploring alone, not to mention taking Eljay with her.

But, as was Elwood's way, he took a deep breath and organized his thoughts before he replied. His brow was deeply furrowed and his gaze was trained on Finley; his frown only deepened when she flinched away from him. There were many drawbacks to this proposal, but something inside him told him to hear her out.

"Okay..." he said slowly, the word hanging in the air as a placeholder rather than a positive acknowledgment. "What gave you that idea?" he asked.

He didn't shout - that was a good sign.  Then again, Elwood never shouted.  He would stare at her with an indiscernable look on his face, take a deep breath, and then calmly encourage her to expand upon whatever nonsense she was spewing all over the place.  As though reading a script, her mate did just that and in spite of the tension she now felt, she smirked adoringly at him.

"Because he's afraid of everything," Fin replied, right off the bat completely botching the speech she'd been practicing in her mind for the last hour, "And I have a job to do for the pack, even though I fucked it up royally last time I attempted it.  He's never going to be happy about me doing my job, but I think maybe if I take him with me and show him that everything can be okay when I go.. I dunno, maybe it'll help."

In truth, it wasn't so much that Finley had a job to do that made her want to resume her responsibilities as an Outrider.  It much more just a part of who she was.  She was adventurous and spirited, and without this outlet, she could never be a good mother for her son or a good mate to Elwood.  Because she wouldn't be her at all.

"Plus you never know, maybe he'll find out that he enjoys it," she added after a beat, remembering the sparkle of intrigue in his eye when she'd told him stories about adventure.

Elwood couldn't argue with Finley's first point. Eljay was afraid of everything, and he had to agree that the only way for the boy to overcome this trait was to experience the world. Otherwise, he would never step foot outside of the rendezvous site -- and how would he ever grow to be a well-adjusted, valued member of the pack if he hid from the world?

But Elwood was still reluctant to give Finley the go-ahead. He knew that she had been on dozens of excursions in the past that hadn't ended in injury -- although there were probably another dozen that had -- but the idea of possibly losing both her and Eljay terrified him. His conscience was at war with itself. Part of him understood her logic, however flawed it may have been, and the other part was simply afraid of the unknown.

"I see what you're saying, but are you sure you're up for that?" he asked, his gaze resting pointedly on her scarred cheek for a moment. He pursed his lips. "You wouldn't take him far, would you? Within howling range?" He could feel himself compromising; despite Finley's reckless nature, he couldn't shut her down. As long as they stayed nearby, he could intervene should trouble arise.

Fin was surprised when he saw reason in her statement.  Not because she thought he would reject it without listening to her, but because it meant that she had actually successfully given good reason.  Her smile of relief was brief as she felt his eyes upon her face and she instinctively turned slightly away.  

"No, no where too far. Not for a first time out," Fin replied.  For one, Eljay probably wouldn't stand for it.  She had thought she might be able to entice him to visit Wildfire at Moonspear eventually, but she wasn't about to get her hopes up yet for that.  Eljay was not likely to forget too soon that it had been there that she'd injured herself.

Elwood gnawed contemplatively on his lower lip. It all sounded harmless enough, but he knew better than to assume things would just go smoothly. He was well aware of Finley's track record, and that was what made him skeptical.

However, he truly felt as though he couldn't turn her down. There was hopefulness in her voice; while she had made improvements in leaps and bounds over the last few weeks, she still wasn't quite herself. Maybe this was the piece of the puzzle that was missing -- maybe this was what she needed to feel whole again. And how could he deny her that?

He sighed. "Okay. I think you're right -- it's probably a good experience for Eljay. But I want you to be careful, and if anything goes wrong, you have to call for me. Maybe I'll even hang out near the borders that day," he said, knowing that his conditions might have seemed a little ridiculous but also realizing that they were necessary. "When do you think you'll go?" he asked.

He agreed in the end.  Finley had been completely undecided going into it whether or not he would, but she found herself to be first relieved and then anxious that he did.  She considered his question for a moment before she sighed, opting to acquiesce to his desire for her to be honest with him as she gave her answer.

"I'm not sure... I'm a little afraid to ask him," Fin admitted with a frown.  It was one thing to get it past big Elwood, but little Elwood?  That was another thing entirely.  "I don't think he'll like it too much, but... I think it's something that needs to be done."  She felt strongly about it, she realized then.  She couldn't say why she did, but she knew almost instinctively that there was nothing better now for her son than to take this journey with him.  But how to make him see it?

Elwood nodded knowingly. More than likely, Eljay would balk at the proposition. So far, in his six months of life, his paws had never crossed Redhawk Caldera's borders. "I can be there with you when you ask him, if you want," he offered. Maybe if they presented a united front as parents, the boy would be more likely to take his mother's suggestion into consideration.

"And who knows," he said with the hint of a smile. "He could surprise us both and want to go!" He chuckled as though he and Finley were sharing a conspiratorial inside joke.

The offer Elwood made to her was tempting.  Even if Elwood didn't participate verbally, just having him there for the conversation would have made her feel more confident.  She smiled gently for a moment, pondering just how much more capable she felt simply by her mate's presence.

Her smile broadened and she laughed gently as he spoke of Eljay actually wanting to go on the venture.  Fat ass chance of that one, and she was pretty certain they both knew it.  She shook her head as her laughter subsided, pursing her lips thoughtfully.  "As much as I'd love to have you there for moral support, I think this is something Jay and I need to do on our own," Fin replied.  She was the one who had screwed things up so badly, and she was the one who needed to mend the damage she had done.  Part of her felt like it wasn't just his confidence she'd broken, but even a bit of their relationship.  He didn't trust anything now, and Fin couldn't help but feel like the reason for that was because he didn't trust her.  Maybe if she could fix that, she could fix everything.

*sloshes wine* Want to wrap this one up? :)

She seemed to consider his offer for a moment, but ultimately turned it down. While Elwood understood her reasons, he still felt mildly hurt. It wasn't something that he would express to Finley, though; despite his slightly bruised ego, he couldn't deny that the relationship between mother and son needed to be repaired without his input. Whether or not this would be successful was yet to be seen.

"Okay, yeah. That's probably a good idea," he agreed with a small, encouraging smile. Elwood's mind was always seeking out positive results, so he reached out to nudge Finley's uninjured cheek with his nose. "I love you," he reminded her softly despite his doubts.

yes yes!

Fin could see he wasn't entirely pleased with her decision. But she knew that she wouldn't need to defend herself with him, even before he admitted that it was probably best that he didn't interfere. She smiled even though she saw his acceptance coming and leaned into his touch. His words tickled her ears, and she eagerly invaded his space to snuggle up close against him, purring against his throat. "I love you too."

Her mind raced with what she would say to Eljay, how she would approach the subject, where she would take him when they went (no where, because she would chicken out like a bitch). But for the moment at least, she wanted only to revel in her mate's embrace. An maybe in a bit, they'd do it.