Totoka River intention, retention, it's all in your head

This was beginning to wear down on Haoming's resolve. All of a sudden, she didn't feel proud and capable and good, like she'd tried to help someone. She felt... defeated, in a sense. She knew she wasn't the nicest person around, but was she really bad enough that he'd rather starve than eat what she had brought to him? 

The thought that he might not want to be friends with her was stupid and intrusive. Haoming didn't want friends anyway. That was... totally not why she'd decided to talk to this random wolf. Right? She was just fine without friends, so why was she trying so hard right now?

"I don't know," she admitted, ears lowering as she looked down at the fish. All of a sudden, she wished she'd never killed it, because she certainly didn't have an appetite right now, and it seemed this boy didn't, either. "Is... I d-didn't mean to upset you. It wasn't my i-intention." 

How did people make friends, anyway? It seemed so time-consuming and pointless. Not that that was what she had been trying to do, of course. Because... because that would be stupid. 

Fuck it. Maybe she did want friends. 

"I wan-wanted to meet you. Talk to you. I didn't mean to b-be mean." It was probably one of the most genuine things she'd said to anyone outside of her littermates. "I shouldn't've assumed y-you needed help."