Lion Head Mesa welcome to the panic room

backdated to uuuuhh haha a date

there were strangers in akashingo. zakariya didn't mingle much with the others anyway, preferring to keep to @Nazli's side as much as possible, but this disturbed him. it also made him curious. the unknown had always felt inherently dangerous to the boy, ever since the day he'd lost his eyes.
but he wondered, too, if it might be better. if people who weren't from akashingo might be different. he couldn't imagine how, and maybe he shouldn't have felt as hopeful as he did. he just couldn't help it. every day he felt more like screaming, like lashing out at everyone and running away from akashingo. he didn't know why. all he knew was that he hated every day, and he hated himself, and he wished things were different.
he wished someone wanted to love him. someone other than nazli. because as much as he loved her, it wasn't the same; they were both in this position, with no one but each other to turn to. what zakariya wanted seemed so simple, but so far away in comparison. why couldn't anyone just... want him?
but he was unwanted. and the hole left in his heart by this knowledge was what drove him to seek out @Germanicus. but when he got there, he lost his nerve entirely. though he could not see the man, zakariya sensed that his presence was vast and hard, and felt he must be much larger than he actually was. the young coywolf battled the urge to cower. if he had eyes, they would have been wide.
y-you... are you from mereo? it was not at all what he'd planned to say, but it was what came out. zakariya winced and awaited the worst.