Dragoncrest Cliffs now keen eyes are keener

 the wave of anxiety and adrenaline blixen has been riding since leaving mother with her family is slowly crashing. really, everything had happened so quickly - getting nomi to agree to bring her and artaax, finding mother at the caldera, mother not waking up, them leaving her... the girl been struggling to find a grip to hold. 

the crushing pressure she's been placing herself under - that desire to be the strongest for them - is still present, but having nomi officially recognize her efforts with the title of gona has helped sooth some of her raging energy. she knows she still has a long way to go and her training must be relentless, but she feels she has regained some more control over her environment. even if she had been forced to leave mother behind.. but she knows nomi is right about that, even if she has to remind herself every time she feels a little bit angry. 

and she has a real friend now - not that bobby and artie aren't great, but they're her brothers and kind of clunkheads. furi is still sort of a weird puzzle but her previous doubts about the girl have all but vanished. she smiles a little thinking of her friend, even when she stops to rub herself against a tree. jeez, she's been so itchy all day..

augh. with a slightly irritable huff the ginger presses on, heading toward the graveyard-garden. with hux gone she wants to keep up with it - as best she can, given how little she knows. at the very least she'll keep it weed-free until the snow starts to fall... though she hopes they'll be back before then. every few minutes she pauses to itch herself with increasing annoyance, but she does not pause in her mission, yet.

Cecil kept his presence a mystery as he followed the strange girl. He wondered where she was going, he didn't really care but he had finished a patrol for the day so perhaps he could have some fun. He followed her for some time, his obsidian coat helping him blend in with the trees that surrounded them, and age gave him the experience of a hunter to avoid her detection.

His amber eyes followed her ever step through the woods, his game already commenced. He wondered how long he could continue before she gave notice of his existence.

i dont mean to be a stalker but...... :P

*waves!*

being a heda-trained gona means blix is more alert to her surroundings than the average wolf -- it doesn't take long for her to realise she's not alone, but she doesn't seek out whoever it is, not yet. if someone wants her for something they'll announce themselves, she figures -- no one within drageda's border would do harm to another. 

still. it is a little weird, and after the presence follows her without announcement all the way to the edge of the forest, the ginger pauses and spins on her heel, annoyed. "uh, hello?" blix says, impatiently. "need something?"

She’d gotten used to observing at a distance while the Heda and other were away and now that they were back, she can find out more. Having already spent time with Blixen once before, talking a little bit about their ways, she’s more curious now. The only information he has on the situation they are facing is what she’d heard from Heda’s mouth in their return. They won’t be executing their own resources and time until Wildfire here in Drageda and that leaves her with mixed feelings. On one hand, they aren’t wasting anything on an outsider and another pack entirely is taking care of her. On the other, the wolf has still become Drageda, Heda’s mate, and they shouldn’t have left her when she deserves to be taken care of her.

Leaving little room for proper judgment, she supposes it had been a logical decision and Thuringwethil appears to have it together, for the most part. Families are sloppy and messy and she hadn’t known what to expect coming here.

Having absently followed Blixen’s scent, she’s arriving when she speaks to someone else—Cecil, her nose tells her—and she catches him stalking in the background but the girl has noticed. A smirk appears on her pale feature and Cecil catches a glimpse of her, bows, and then turns and leaves. Ajatar watches him disappear. She hadn’t truly dismissed him but he had become an annoyance and a single look worked well. With a quirk of her eyebrow in amusement, she slowly turns to Blixen with a slight roll of her eyes—boys—and a smirk on her features.

270

she makes out cecil being weird - and then bowing hastily to ajatar, who's also appeared on the scene, before leaving. huh. ajatar rolls her eyes at her and the ginger snorts a laugh, a little unsettled. which is worse: a guy she barely knows using her for stalking practice or the fos goufa, who she kind of has unresolved feelings about? well - the snowy-furred woman looks more playful than blix has ever seen her, which is encouraging.

"thanks, i guess?" the gona says, stepping a little closer. "boys are weird," she adds definitively, though her experiences are admittedly limited. bobby and artaax are, well, a couple of knuckleheads, bless their hearts, and sirio grew up into a weird dude too. girls are vastly preferrable, she thinks, in more ways than one (her sexuality has never really been something to think too hard about - she doesn't like anyone right now but she grew up with two mothers and so the idea of being with women instead of men seems more natural to  her than anything else).

Ajatar brushes off the thanks—Cecil had been creepy but at least he picked up the hint and left them alone. Blixen’s confession that boys are weird, however, gets a snort out of her. Right? her eyes read as she glances over with a smirk. “They’re kind of useless,” she jokes, shifting her weight to keep moving. Her eyes take lead and point the way she’s going, should Blixen wish to tag along.

71

sorry this is short u_u

maybe ajatar isn't as bad as she initally thought. the gona smiles, easily falling into step besides the white-furred woman. it occurs to her than ajatar probably isn't all that much older than her (or at least, that they're closer in age than the fos goufa is to nomi). "whatcha up to?" she asks after a beat, curious what she gets up to in her spare time. she knows the role of fos goufa, of course, but she's not actually sure what the ... duties are, beyond the standard duties to drageda.

My last one was super short, lol, and so is this one. Ajatar is awkward to write for someties, ha.

The girl takes the invite and it isn’t long before she recalls how talkative the girl had been the last time she’d spent time with her. Inwardly, she sighs, zeroing in on where they’re going. She weaves through the forest with relative ease but she points the both of them toward the borders for something resembling productivity. If Blixen is going to do nothing but talk again, she can at least get some use out of her.

“Patrolling,” she answers after a beat and considers leaving it at that. It’s enough to ask the question, and she doesn’t have interest in returning the sentiment, before she glances olive green eyes to the side Blixen is walking on. “It’s kind of… relaxing,” she offers, licking her lips and continuing on until they find a path that takes them directly to the edge of the forest.

144

*suddenly remembers blix was supposed to have fleas in this thread*

blix certainly doesn't complain when ajatar points them toward the borders. in fact, she perks up a bit. during her training before the trip to the caldera patrolling quickly became her favorite past time and she's always glad to have company for it. she's gotten furi to start coming with her sometimes and she likes that, but ajatar isn't the worst second choice.

"it is," she agrees readily, eyes scanning ahead as they walk. her original mission - to check on the graveyard - is all but forgotten, but she still feels that restless energy and the occasional distracting itch in her side. stubbornly she refuses to scratch in front of the fos goufa, still intent on - proving herself, she guesses. it's not exactly subtle that ajatar doesn't approve of her family's existence, even if she seems to accept blixen herself to a degree. "ajatar," she starts after a few moments of silence (if you were hoping for a quiet walk, dear fos goufa, you picked the wrong partner), "have there been any other hedas with.. you know, a family?"

It is quiet for a time and Ajatar things—naively—that it will be like this. The peace will continue and Ajatar can do her patrol while letting her own thoughts rule the conversation taking place in her head. Maybe she’d been wrong about Blixen and the last time she’d been nervous or trying to impress or any number of things. She is a presence in Drageda with purpose of taking over but she has no interest in it until the time comes where she ascends.

However, the silence is broken after a few moments and her irritation is shown only in the slow blink of her eyes and the long second before she opens them again. It is but a fleeting glance of emotion while the rest of her is void of anything else.

“There has not been many,” she begins, “they do not tend to last long.”

The information about their families isn’t always important. They are a brief mention during training, unless it’s relevant to something significant happening that impacts the entire pack and their branches. Most of the time it is ended because of the strain on either side and the wolf’s inability to separate their lives enough and still be useful as Heda.

208

as ever she is oblivious to ajatar's irritation with her. and, anyway, she brought blix along, she asked for this. ajatar confirms there have been other heda's with families, which makes blixen feel smug, until she says they don't last long. what is long comparatively? nomi's been heda for basically forever. she hums, wanting to hear more but trying to think of a more clever way to phrase it than just why. unfortunately, she can't think of anything.

"why? not - i can guess why they don't last long," she clarifies, "but, why is it so frowned upon?" she knows the answer in theory (or could at least puzzle it out) but given that her and artaax, and even bobby, are fairly solid members of drageda and nomi performs as heda still quite well she doesn't really get the fuss. maybe nomi's just that good, she thinks, and puffs up slightly with pride beside the fos goufa.

When Blixen asks why, Ajatar’s ears twitch upon her head. The way of life in Drageda is vastly different from Trigeda, she knows that much. But they flourish, without Heda, but knowing they are still there. For years they have not been together and even when Seageda had been around, there was little influence. The need for war is what often brought them together, or an exchange of goods and services when necessary. It is as much the same with Maungeda, she imagines, for she has only ever known Drageda in the far distance. The loyalty to them is not the same and they are brought up differently. Blixen, her own child, isn’t going to think anything of it.

“A commander’s duty is to their wolves. They are the strongest one to hold the Heda’s spirit. Nothing is supposed to cloud their judgment,” she begins, keeping her gaze forward as she walks. “They must choose duty over their emotions.”

She clears her throat as if she is going to speak against, but she hesitates a few seconds, flicking green eyes toward Blixen, but it is subtle and returns quickly. “It is not something anyone can prevent from happening but it usually upsets the rest of the of the wolves to see their commander… distracted. Our teachings prevent us from the idea of having a family. When a fos goufa is born, they are taken away from their birth mother and raised separately. They have no family to offer bias,” she explains. When you shove a wolf without any familial upbringing into a family, the strain is noticeable and decisions become harder to make. Ajatar’s decisions are easily led to and with nothing to distract her. The whole of Drageda, Trigeda, Maungeda, depends on every move the Heda makes regardless of their proximity.

302

ajatar gives the answer blixen was expecting, but it's not the answer she was hoping for. or rather - she gets it but it just seems so silly. she opens her mouth to protest it, but the fos goufa speaks instead, and her teeth clink as she snaps her jaw shut again. "do the wolves in seageda and trigeda disapprove? of m- of us?" the ginger asks, frowning. the thought rankles her; she's dedicated her entire life to protecting drageda - to protecting their way of life - and the thought that some strangers might not approve of her just because of the circumstances of her birth feels.. strange. she knows drageda is more accepting of .. outsiders than is maybe strictly necessary (a policy that she's not even a fan of, even though, technically speaking, she would not exist if drageda did not allow outsiders). 

the gona sighs and shakes her head slightly. "but what started it?" she asks, feeling for some reason the need to pick at this. "like - did someone accidentally start a war out of love or something?"

When Blixen asks about Trigeda and Sangeda and the other branches and whether or not they approve. It is a difficult question to answer when it makes her just as much of them being born here than anyone else but her origin is left to question. Ajatar can guess at the semantics of how they came to fruition without being directly told. Thuringwethil has kept separated from her family as much as she can while still being directly involved. “Some do, yes,” she answers but considers it is not quite enough. “It is complicated. But it is easy for them because they are not here,” she adds a beat later. It had been easy for her to disapprove in Trigeda when there had been no connection. It is a fact that belongs to wolves that have little impact on her daily life but now, here she is in Drageda, and their existence challenges the ways she’s been taught. It doesn’t create any wiggle room for her own beliefs but perhaps Thuringwethil hadn’t known the whole time of her desires.

“Yes and no,” she starts and glances, wondering how much she really wants to know. Doubt in their current head isn’t what she wants to instill. “The few that have taken the risk make a foolish decision that results in their death, or puts their family at risk by being close to the Heda. Do you think your mother’s kidnapping is coincidence?” she says, and then glances away. Thuingwethil is keen to believe it does not relate to anything directly at them but if it had been anyone but her mate, she isn’t sure any of this would be happening.

ajatar's answer is pretty much what she expected, but she still doesn't like it. it's not as if she asked for the circumstances of her birth to be what they are, but she's dedicated herself to drageda the same as any other pack-born wolf. the redhead snorts a little at ajatar's qualifier - yeah, it is easier for them. if they knew how hard artaax and her work (and.. well, bobby's cute, so there's that, she guesses) they'd probably think differently.

ajatar's second answer catches her off guard. "you think someone attacked mother to get at nomi?" the gona asks, incredulous. nomi's never given any indication that was the cause, but blixen has to admit, it doesn't sound completely unlikely. she frowns, thinking. if a wolf other than mother had been taken, would nomi - would all of drageda - had been in such an uproar? mother'd also been a high-ranking member.. if something had happened to dio -- well, but that's complicated too, isn't it. she's never really considered how her family could be a blind spot, but maybe ajatar is right. "i don't know," she finally says, struggling with her mixed feelings. "but - i do know i'm gonna get strong enough to keep us all safe, so it won't matter, anyway." there'a a touch of defiance in the statement - she already knows what she'd do for her family - and furi - and okay, yeah, she thinks she'd feel differently if something happened to someone she doesn't feel as close to, but that's normal. and honestly - blixen's pretty protective of everyone she knows, regardless. between her, and dio, and furi, anyone who means to cause nomi or her family harm doesn't know what's coming to 'em.

“Not necessarily,” she begins, unfazed by the sudden question. “But it’s not impossible. It wouldn’t be the first time,” she offers. They have a long history, and a surprising number of Heda that have made mistakes throughout the years. They are not exact replicas of Jumala, but they rely on her guidance and if they do not properly follow instruction, bad things come of it.

Blixen doesn’t know what to make of the question but she isn’t above making outlandish expectations. Ajatar lets her preen over herself a moment, silence ticking by between them. She turns to look at the girl again with one eyebrow higher than the other, curious. One tragedy sets the tone for her future and her hopes are high, but it is a long way to fall when failure is inevitable at some point or another. It wouldn’t be easy to explain it to Blixen so that she will understand and instead, allows her to find out by experience. Ajatar swings her head back around and remains silent, hoping to shift the overall atmosphere.

blixen frowns and looks at the ground, away from the deceptively pretty-but-cold fos goufa. away from the idea of mother's disappearance being linked to her relationship with nomi. maybe it happened in the past but she doesn't want to accept that this could be something similar. and ajatar doesn't respond to her boast, either, which kills a bit of her confidence. she lapses into a slightly unhappy silence, following ajatar's lead as they continue to patrol - better informed, but not pleased about it.