Stone Circle optimist

set in the morning, 7/13

Ever since his first ventures out of the den, Ikiaq had, as expected, been hesitant about leaving again. He was by far big enough to do so, at two months old, but... he was scared. He'd always be scared, most likely, but it was getting to the point that even he didn't want to stay in the cramped den anymore. Not even with Valette, who he cared for, but still didn't match up to what he wanted. 

He'd never have Nanook again. That had sunk in already, and he was no longer waiting for her. No longer expecting her to return to the den and cuddle up with him and his siblings again. But that didn't mean he no longer missed her. His mother's absence would always leave an unfillable chasm in his chest. 

But it didn't have to hold him back forever. 

Approaching the entrance to the den, and finding that he was not struck down instantly, Ikiaq was emboldened. The brown boy stepped outside, feeling the sun warm his fur, and sighed softly as he entered the sunlight entirely. It was... nice. Not as frightening as he thought, but... then again, he was finally doing this of his own accord. This was his choice.

he’d been able to fall asleep again, but at what cost? there weren’t any nightmares, nor were there any dreams; at night, he was lulled by the same darkness which festered in the day. alsek was drained of all life, of all energy, searching desperately for any single string of happiness.

but there was none to be found.

everyone left him, with polaris surely included; how long did he have before becoming truly, heartbreakingly alone?

alsek trudged through the territory on heavy, dragging paws, faint stains smudged on the crease between eye and snout. in fact, he’d been so distracted by the weight of his own body that the sudden appearance of another nearly went unnoticed.

he forced himself to smile, trying his best to hide the inner devastation. oh, hi, alsek said, his voice uncharacteristically low, do you live here? valette’s scent was strong, so he assumed that this was her sleeping place, too.

Okay, so when Ikiaq had decided to finally face the world today, he certainly had not expected to meet a stranger. And absolutely not one around his own size - that was weird. Anxiety spiked in his chest and it took every bit of his courage to stand his ground, baby blue eyes watching the boy who approached with careful consideration. 

He looked sad. Sad was something Ikiaq was very familiar with - he'd seen the expression on almost every wolf he'd ever met, after his mother's death. And he really, really hated that expression.

The boy asked him a question, and Ikiaq, while being a late bloomer in most areas of life, was actually pretty bright for his age. "I lib here," he replied, shuffling his paws as he looked up at his newfound companion. "Whasser name?" the pup asked, tipping his head to the side.

oh, okay. my name’s alsek, he explained, i live with polaris. do you know her? based on what he knew, it was unlikely that they’d met given the boy’s assumed age and how long they’d been away, but alsek was still curious to know.

ikiaq seemed interested in tagging along. alsek didn’t really know why because he’d figured everyone would want to steer clear of the sad kid, but he was grateful nonetheless. uh, do you know what flowers are? he asked next.

"Awsek." Alsek was his name, and he was asking about Polaris. She was not someone he had heard of, so he shook his head in response. "I know 'Lette," he responded matter-of-factly, feeling a bit more at ease now that he was actually talking to this other boy. 

Another question, and another thing Ikiaq had not heard of. "I not know plowers," the boy told him, feeling a little embarrassed that he didn't know. "Awsek know plowers?"

they continued walking toward the lavender patch, though it was likely that neither knew beforehand. alsek could barely see the stalks of purple between intermediate foliage when he turned away to answer ikiaq’s question.

yeah, he replied, i know flowers. he couldn’t exactly remember what germanicus had told him about the gods, but he assumed that it’d had something to do with flowers. either way, that’s how he’d come to understand it, and it was beginning to reflect in the way he lived.

however, none of that anecdote would mean anything if ikiaq didn’t have basic context. alsek thought about how to explain, then said, there’s something called ‘gods’. have you heard of that? a moment passed. gods do things, like.. like make flowers grow. look!

alsek was momentarily brought from his desolate state by the flowing patch of lavender, now only a few steps away. the smell was like nothing he’d ever encountered before; though sweet, its scent stung from nostril to chest, leaving tiny dustlets behind. this is a flower, i think, he explained, isn’t it cool?

Ikiaq hadn't realized he was following the boy until they got to the patch with the purple flowers. And by that point, it wasn't worth getting freaked out over. There wasn't anything dangerous here, he figured, and they weren't all that far from the den. So... it was fine, right?

The flowers were pretty, even if he didn't quite understand all of what Alsek was saying. Gods? Gods made flowers grow? That was certainly something Ikiaq would be skeptical about in the future, but as of now, he took it at face value. His new companion had said it was true, after all, and so it must be right. Alsek knew so much!

"Cool," he echoed, padding forward and touching his nose to the flower. Upon inhaling, he perked up, a bit of excitement fluttering in his chest. "Smell sweet!" He liked flowers, he thought. Flowers were good.

yeah, it does! he couldn’t hold in the laugh that followed, nor could he suppress that growing grin. do you want to taste it? this was normally how alsek conducted his research, by sniffing and then tasting the subject, but he wasn’t sure if ikiaq would be willing.

another wind blew past, sending more of that sweet lavender scent into the air. we can pick some for you to give to valette. that would make her happy, don’t you think?

You could eat flowers? Alsek was just full of knowledge! Wide blue eyes took in the sight of the lavender again and he, without hesitation, reached forward to take a big bite of the purple flower. It was... weird, he decided. Not bad, but certainly not something he'd really want to eat much of in the future, if he could help it. After chewing for a few moments, Ikiaq spit it out with a wrinkle of his nose. "I not like it," he informed Alsek, muzzle still crinkled in distaste.

Oh! That was a good idea, too. Valette would probably really like these flowers, and Ikiaq would love to bring them to her. "Yeah! 'Lette gets plowers." Enthusiastic in this new venture, Ikiaq bounced a bit on his toes, waiting for Alsek to demonstrate how to pick them.

they were in agreement, then. it’s.. yeah, that’s nasty. the lavender stalks were bitter.. while being simultaneously tasteless? alsek couldn’t wrap his mind around it, but knew that it wasn’t something he’d look forward to trying again.

he went on scraping his tongue for a moment to get any residual lavender off, then positioned himself for a demonstration. okay, watch me, alsek told ikiaq. he grabbed the stalk near its middle and gently clamped down with his front teeth, positioning himself to give his student a better view.

next, he twisted his head slowly and slight, adding just enough pressure to splinter the plant. see? alsek asked, his jaws full of ‘plower’, you try.

Yeah, lavender tasted gross. Ikiaq decided then that it was only for looking at and giving as presents. But it was likely that it would remain one of the boy's favorite smells, going forward in life. It would remind him of the first time he ever left the den of his own accord, and of his first friend. 

The whole process of picking the lavender seemed straightforward enough, and while he was a little lest adept at it than Alsek was, he managed to pick one for Valette himself. Only one, though, because more would probably be wasteful and he wanted to leave as many as possible. 

"'Lette gonna like this," he announced, placing his lavender that he'd picked on the ground at his paws. The boy smiled up at his friend. "Thank you, Awsek!"

you’re good at this, he commented, we can come back sometime, okay? alsek didn’t mind bringing the boy along, and he would never turn down the opportunity to forage, which meant that this was likely only the first of many garden meetings.

alsek picked the stalk back up and turned toward the den, motioning for ikiaq to do the same. let’s go show valette, he mused, tail wagging as he began to walk.

The praise formed little bubbles of pride in Ikiaq's chest, and his tail wiggled excitedly behind him. "Okay," he agreed, looking forward to more outings with Alsek. Learning more about the natural world was an exciting prospect, even if it frightened him as well. Perhaps Alsek could make it all better. 

Valette was going to love these flowers, he thought as he followed the older boy. Ikiaq was prancing, proud of himself and happier than he could remember being in a while. He'd get to come back soon, he promised himself, fixing puppy blue eyes on the back of Alsek's head. 

Alsek was cool.

fade