run-hozier
set it this afternoon's light rain/windy
[size=medium]"If I had a heart you're the one who should break it"[/size]
[size=small]Little droplets of platinumn fell from the sky as the clouds, dressed in the same elegant silver as the Ollivander, wept openly into the the lands below. But this shower of tears that fell onto the Teekon Wilds did little to bother the male, who without much care for any of it continued to trot through the pine trees and ferns of the Ravensblood forest, his nose hovering idly over the snow covered ground.
Even with a cape of dampness weighting upon his shoulders, the young Delta still looked divine; the shiny droplets of water slicked his fur back giving him the bad boy vibe he had missed so much.
After his emotional crash and burn, he had clipped his own wings and stuck close to the Plateu in fear to ever find her again, but as the weeks, and months had gone by he had slowly discarded those feelings. During his hiatus, the daring Outrider had cleaned out his brain and his heart, leaving nothing but a feeling of strong desire to run inside the adventurous male. Still, even if the possibility of ever crossing paths with what had caused him so much pain no longer tortured him, it had been his duties to the pack what had kept him tied to the Plateu.
But today, with his last patrols of the day covered he was out off Plateu's grounds. Like a lighting bolt that had just fallen from the sad gray cloud above he broke into a gallop, his paws tearing over the snow as he ventured further into the dark forest that was Ravensblood.
Running was Finn's ecstasy.
And right now, with the rain drops trickling off his body and his head emptying with every step he took, he could run forever.
[/size]
Even with a cape of dampness weighting upon his shoulders, the young Delta still looked divine; the shiny droplets of water slicked his fur back giving him the bad boy vibe he had missed so much.
After his emotional crash and burn, he had clipped his own wings and stuck close to the Plateu in fear to ever find her again, but as the weeks, and months had gone by he had slowly discarded those feelings. During his hiatus, the daring Outrider had cleaned out his brain and his heart, leaving nothing but a feeling of strong desire to run inside the adventurous male. Still, even if the possibility of ever crossing paths with what had caused him so much pain no longer tortured him, it had been his duties to the pack what had kept him tied to the Plateu.
But today, with his last patrols of the day covered he was out off Plateu's grounds. Like a lighting bolt that had just fallen from the sad gray cloud above he broke into a gallop, his paws tearing over the snow as he ventured further into the dark forest that was Ravensblood.
Running was Finn's ecstasy.
And right now, with the rain drops trickling off his body and his head emptying with every step he took, he could run forever.
[/size]
February 07, 2015, 06:45 PM
By the time Finley stopped running, she felt as though her legs were about to splinter in shards. The world had swept by in a blur of color, but she'd barely even seen that much of it. She'd just ran. Like she always did when times were tough, when things got bad, when real emotions began to go twang! These were things that the fiesty Blackthorn was not equipped to handful. Things that she once upon a time had tried to manage, had tried to bury deep, deep down so that she could continue living her happy little daydream, but had reared their ugly heads and torn her to shreds in the end. Shreds that she'd never really put herself back together from.
Fin had no idea where it was that she was going, nor did she even realize where she was when she got there. There were trees, that was something. She complimented herself inwardly on being able to notice that much - it was somewhat of an improvement. In the back of her mind, she realized that she hadn't gotten to the main event yet. There was a storm coming, she knew it. It brewed in the very back of her heart, kept at bay by a stubborn and determined will to never, never ever fall apart. Not over men. Not again. She'd barely survived it the last time, she wouldn't next time. Not if it happened again.
Eventually she stopped and fell to her haunches. Rain softly fell upon her pelt, but she barely even noticed as she hung her head low. It was too much, too heavy. She couldn't bear it anymore, the weight. She didn't understand, which scared and confused her even further. Why did this hurt so much?: She'd been so careful, been so cautious. She'd warned him not to fall in love with her. She was supposed to be safe. She'd warned.. him...
It was right as her body began to tremble and break, right as her tears began to fall in waves as the sobs wracked her hunched form, that she realized the fatal flaw in her plan. She'd never told herself not to fall for him.
Fin had no idea where it was that she was going, nor did she even realize where she was when she got there. There were trees, that was something. She complimented herself inwardly on being able to notice that much - it was somewhat of an improvement. In the back of her mind, she realized that she hadn't gotten to the main event yet. There was a storm coming, she knew it. It brewed in the very back of her heart, kept at bay by a stubborn and determined will to never, never ever fall apart. Not over men. Not again. She'd barely survived it the last time, she wouldn't next time. Not if it happened again.
Eventually she stopped and fell to her haunches. Rain softly fell upon her pelt, but she barely even noticed as she hung her head low. It was too much, too heavy. She couldn't bear it anymore, the weight. She didn't understand, which scared and confused her even further. Why did this hurt so much?: She'd been so careful, been so cautious. She'd warned him not to fall in love with her. She was supposed to be safe. She'd warned.. him...
It was right as her body began to tremble and break, right as her tears began to fall in waves as the sobs wracked her hunched form, that she realized the fatal flaw in her plan. She'd never told herself not to fall for him.
sorry i could not spree yesterday -- [size=xx-small]alcohol fml[/size]
also eeep missed threading with chu
also eeep missed threading with chu
[size=medium]"If I had a heart you're the one who should break it"[/size]
[size=small]As his paws treaded quickly over the ground, tearing the velveteen layer of snow that covered the earth Finn almost failed to awknowledge the gloomy silhouette of another being at the far right side of the labyrinth of trees that made up the forest. With his pace slowing into a calm walk he allowed his tasted the air idly, the fat raindrops rolling over his snout plastering his fur into the chiveled, careless look he had sported during his debut in the Teekon Wilds.
But as he breathed in the cold winter air, a particular fragrance, the residues of a perfume he had once known so well, wafted into his nose; making the silver man twist his ears in both bewilderment and fascination.
The cross of their roads was one that came to him unexpectedly, but never unwelcomed. After his wounds had healed and his tongue had been reprimanded for its brash reactions, the though of seeing her, his stunt double, did no longer trouble him. Still, he could speak only for himself; who knew what effect time had had on her.
For all he knew, the stretched out months could have turned him into a stranger in her phonebook.
He considered resuming his run, but quickly discarded the thought as he remembered how much it had hurt him when she had been the one to play Houdini. Another heavy coat of water fell onto his back, and though his lips had suddenly become dry, he decided to move forth.
It was worth the shot if she was already here; and besides, if she didn't want his company, she could always call on one of her bear friends, right?
(hopefully she wouldn't have the need to)
With a last shake of his charmingly tousled fur and the beginning of a smile stating to curve his lips he approached, his head hanging neutrally between his shoulder blades as he allowed the tip of his tail to betray what his olive eyes didn't.
Delight.
Even if they had lost touch after their horrible crash and burn, to the Ollivander, the fallout could not be attributed to nothing but their (both's) own inmaturity.
A soft woof,resembling the one he had used with the small Mayfair princess, escaped from his lips announcing his presence beforehand in hopes to prevent the female from falling towards her much rehearsed routine of run run run.
"Hey, girl" he barked, unable to stop himself from using the same little quip he had used in one of their most ancient encounters. And unable to rid his face of the amiable, charming smile that came along with it.
"What's been happenin' in your world, Finley Blackthorn?" He asked, an alternative form of a 'how are you?' that was issued with a cautious voice and his lingering steps. Today, at least from his side, no mention of their miserable last encounter would be made. Even if the rain was pouring down and the sky shared the same grey coat they both wore, something about her lack of...fiery craziness told him that any allusion to the subject was better off being avoided.
[/size]
But as he breathed in the cold winter air, a particular fragrance, the residues of a perfume he had once known so well, wafted into his nose; making the silver man twist his ears in both bewilderment and fascination.
The cross of their roads was one that came to him unexpectedly, but never unwelcomed. After his wounds had healed and his tongue had been reprimanded for its brash reactions, the though of seeing her, his stunt double, did no longer trouble him. Still, he could speak only for himself; who knew what effect time had had on her.
For all he knew, the stretched out months could have turned him into a stranger in her phonebook.
He considered resuming his run, but quickly discarded the thought as he remembered how much it had hurt him when she had been the one to play Houdini. Another heavy coat of water fell onto his back, and though his lips had suddenly become dry, he decided to move forth.
It was worth the shot if she was already here; and besides, if she didn't want his company, she could always call on one of her bear friends, right?
(hopefully she wouldn't have the need to)
With a last shake of his charmingly tousled fur and the beginning of a smile stating to curve his lips he approached, his head hanging neutrally between his shoulder blades as he allowed the tip of his tail to betray what his olive eyes didn't.
Delight.
Even if they had lost touch after their horrible crash and burn, to the Ollivander, the fallout could not be attributed to nothing but their (both's) own inmaturity.
A soft woof,resembling the one he had used with the small Mayfair princess, escaped from his lips announcing his presence beforehand in hopes to prevent the female from falling towards her much rehearsed routine of run run run.
"Hey, girl" he barked, unable to stop himself from using the same little quip he had used in one of their most ancient encounters. And unable to rid his face of the amiable, charming smile that came along with it.
"What's been happenin' in your world, Finley Blackthorn?" He asked, an alternative form of a 'how are you?' that was issued with a cautious voice and his lingering steps. Today, at least from his side, no mention of their miserable last encounter would be made. Even if the rain was pouring down and the sky shared the same grey coat they both wore, something about her lack of...fiery craziness told him that any allusion to the subject was better off being avoided.
[/size]
February 08, 2015, 08:19 PM
Not a problem, dollface! <3 I missed this tooooo :3
Time seemed to stop as Finley fell to pieces upon the forest floor. She couldn't shake the image out of her head. Elwood's sturdy peppered frame climbing up onto the hips of that black bitch. She felt bile rise in her throat, but try as she might, she couldn't make it go away. Elwood. Her Elwood. How could he? Why would he choose her? How long had they been doing this behind her back? All that time, Fin had never known. How could she have been so stupid.
The mental self-abuse might have continued for quite a while had the voice of another not interrupted her train of thought. She felt her breath catch in her throat and her body tense. Slowly, she lifted her head, not daring to turn and set her eyes upon the wolf who had approached her from behind. She didn't need to knew. She knew who it was. She would always know exactly who it was.
Finley bit her lip hard and swallowed, choking down the misery. Silently, she thanked god for the rain that masked her tears as she turned to look upon her doppleganger. "Oh, you know," she replied, forcing a smile upon her face, "Pickin' fights, causing chaos, the usual." She felt the tears swelling in her eyes again, but she blinked them away with the rain. Though the weather did much to hide some of her pain, there was nothing that could disguise the tremble in her voice, the weakness in her smile, or the look of terrible hurt in her sweet chocolate eyes.
February 08, 2015, 10:13 PM
<3
[size=medium]"If I had a heart you're the one who should break it"[/size]
[size=small]Completely oblivious to the emotional dilema that burdened his stunt double's mind he offered another of his signature charming smiles. Had he known what had been running through Finley's mind, and the possesive pronouns she used with such emphasis, he might have perhaps turned tail. Luckily for both, the feminine mind continued to be an uncryptable enigma.
And Finley, as a one of a kind-girl held perhaps the most complex mind of them all.
As she turned to face him he pulled his ears forward, cupping them attentively towards her as he gave his tail a slow wag. She responded with the same casual tone long times friends used. As if there had been no distance, no pain, no months wedged between them. Again, and quite unexpectedly she managed to surprise him.
As love, perhaps grudges weren't her thing.
Good for him.
"Didn't expect less from you" he barked amiably, his eyes suddenly doubting if the sad raincloud were the only ones to blame for the wetness beneath her eyes. It was hard for him to distinguish the tears in her face with the ones of the clouds, but it was even harder to understand why she diverted her gaze as he smiled and held her voice hushed as if she were afraid of maybe speaking to loud.
Of letting finally her thoughts to be translated into words.
Her words could try to lie, and her faux smile could fool him, but her eyes; her eyes were unable to conceal the overwhelming emotion that consumed her insides. "Tell me who did it an I'll beat him to mush" he whispered, a light jest that was meant to show his awareness of her discomfort without being to forward. Even if the possibility, which was ironically more real that he thought it to be, of another man being the cause of her despair roused a small flicker of jealousy within the depths of his stomach he still held a gentle smile for her.
Whether it was a moth or a bigger pest, the silver Ollivander would be willing to lend his teeth and claws -- or lend himself to her teeth and claws.
While he was not a punching bag, and had no desires to be so, it was the sudden emptyness in her brown eyes what led him to offer his moral support.
All she had to do was to meet her brown orbs with his olive eyes.
[/size]
And Finley, as a one of a kind-girl held perhaps the most complex mind of them all.
As she turned to face him he pulled his ears forward, cupping them attentively towards her as he gave his tail a slow wag. She responded with the same casual tone long times friends used. As if there had been no distance, no pain, no months wedged between them. Again, and quite unexpectedly she managed to surprise him.
As love, perhaps grudges weren't her thing.
Good for him.
"Didn't expect less from you" he barked amiably, his eyes suddenly doubting if the sad raincloud were the only ones to blame for the wetness beneath her eyes. It was hard for him to distinguish the tears in her face with the ones of the clouds, but it was even harder to understand why she diverted her gaze as he smiled and held her voice hushed as if she were afraid of maybe speaking to loud.
Of letting finally her thoughts to be translated into words.
Her words could try to lie, and her faux smile could fool him, but her eyes; her eyes were unable to conceal the overwhelming emotion that consumed her insides. "Tell me who did it an I'll beat him to mush" he whispered, a light jest that was meant to show his awareness of her discomfort without being to forward. Even if the possibility, which was ironically more real that he thought it to be, of another man being the cause of her despair roused a small flicker of jealousy within the depths of his stomach he still held a gentle smile for her.
Whether it was a moth or a bigger pest, the silver Ollivander would be willing to lend his teeth and claws -- or lend himself to her teeth and claws.
While he was not a punching bag, and had no desires to be so, it was the sudden emptyness in her brown eyes what led him to offer his moral support.
All she had to do was to meet her brown orbs with his olive eyes.
[/size]
February 08, 2015, 10:30 PM
(This post was last modified: February 09, 2015, 02:38 PM by Finley.)
The conversation between them came easy. It always had, up until their hearts got in the way of their words. The reply that slipped from his mouth pressed upon another sore spot in her heart, one that she'd buried away down where she kept so many other pesky emotions. But, once one piece of the complex darkness in her heart broke free, the rest were always quick to follow and consume her. Thus she couldn't help herself as she heard him try to come to her rescue, when she lifted her gaze to meet his, and when the last vestiges of her walls came crumbling down.
Fin turned away as quickly as she could to keep him from seeing, but knew that it was no use. Her body tensed and trembled as her sobs returned to her. She tucked her limbs tightly against herself and hunched over, so great was the pain that burned in her chest. It would be wrong to say that misery in which she was drowning was completely Elwood's doing. Certainly he'd broken the dam, but it had been built to hold back far more than just this betrayal.
Fin turned away as quickly as she could to keep him from seeing, but knew that it was no use. Her body tensed and trembled as her sobs returned to her. She tucked her limbs tightly against herself and hunched over, so great was the pain that burned in her chest. It would be wrong to say that misery in which she was drowning was completely Elwood's doing. Certainly he'd broken the dam, but it had been built to hold back far more than just this betrayal.
[size=medium]"If I had a heart you're the one who should break it"[/size]
[size=small] Though the underlying reasons to her current sadness had not yet been voiced, it was the same vacant dullness that reflected from her chocolately eyes what gave the silver Ollivander a clue of what was going through the female's head. If he had not been wrong about it (something he thought to be highly probable due to his inability to comprehend the female mind), it had been his olive eyes the ones that had once sported the same emptiness she now wore in her orbs. Still, seeing her bear the same bitterness she had ironically given him at the time was not in the smallest sense rewarding.
Even in the midst of the hurt and the grief, he had never wished her wrong.
With the months, the sour little flavour she had left in his mouth had faded, only to be now revived by her gloomy expression.
This Finley, who cried in unision with the clouds was not the one he knew; not the one he remembered with fondness. And as much as it pained him, he knew that it was perhaps because of this same moment of weakness in which she collapsed, that he was able to stand before her. Had she no time for feelings? Had she no interest in them? Or had she had no time or interest for just him?
Whatever the answer was, the sudden melting of her eyes into his caused his smile to falter subtly.
Would this be just a repeat of their last encounter?
The thought made his clench his jaw tightly, he didn't want to let the moment be clouded by the events of their past run-in. He would make no mention of it, not aloud, not while she was down. Hell not ever.
Finn could be a douche, but not to that extent.
"Do you want to punch me and pretend I'm a bear?" he quipped, his voice gentle, his eyes slipping down the contour of her face in searchs of any spark, any sign that the crazy wolf he knew had not become a ghost.
"Or.. do you want me to get fucking lost?" he added hesitantly, never knowing what to expect out of Finley it was better to ask. While the memories (the good ones) he had of her were sunny, she was now pouring rain from her eyes and with the same ease she could turn into a thunderstorm.
He was willing to stand with her in the rain, in her rain, so with lingering doubt he closed the distance between them, his neck suddenly craning over her head in a slow, gentle manner.
He was no super hero but he could be a pretty damn good umbrella.
[/size]
Even in the midst of the hurt and the grief, he had never wished her wrong.
With the months, the sour little flavour she had left in his mouth had faded, only to be now revived by her gloomy expression.
This Finley, who cried in unision with the clouds was not the one he knew; not the one he remembered with fondness. And as much as it pained him, he knew that it was perhaps because of this same moment of weakness in which she collapsed, that he was able to stand before her. Had she no time for feelings? Had she no interest in them? Or had she had no time or interest for just him?
Whatever the answer was, the sudden melting of her eyes into his caused his smile to falter subtly.
Would this be just a repeat of their last encounter?
The thought made his clench his jaw tightly, he didn't want to let the moment be clouded by the events of their past run-in. He would make no mention of it, not aloud, not while she was down. Hell not ever.
Finn could be a douche, but not to that extent.
"Do you want to punch me and pretend I'm a bear?" he quipped, his voice gentle, his eyes slipping down the contour of her face in searchs of any spark, any sign that the crazy wolf he knew had not become a ghost.
"Or.. do you want me to get fucking lost?" he added hesitantly, never knowing what to expect out of Finley it was better to ask. While the memories (the good ones) he had of her were sunny, she was now pouring rain from her eyes and with the same ease she could turn into a thunderstorm.
He was willing to stand with her in the rain, in her rain, so with lingering doubt he closed the distance between them, his neck suddenly craning over her head in a slow, gentle manner.
He was no super hero but he could be a pretty damn good umbrella.
[/size]
February 11, 2015, 07:53 PM
Fin gulped in breaths, trying desperately to steady herself against her misery. She wasn't even aware as Finn closed the distance tentatively between them. She did hear him as he spoke to her, and as much as she wanted to laugh at his comments about him being a bear, she couldn't manage it as she hunched over further and continued to fall apart before him.
His next words made her pause, and suddenly she was looking at him with wild desperation in even as came to stand over her and protect her from the rain. "No, please Finn," she told him as she pressed herself hard against him and buried her face in the plush fur of his throat, "Please don't go, please, please." It was wrong of her to ask, and somewhere in her pain-stricken heart she knew that. But she needed someone now, needed him. She couldn't get through this hurt on her own.
His next words made her pause, and suddenly she was looking at him with wild desperation in even as came to stand over her and protect her from the rain. "No, please Finn," she told him as she pressed herself hard against him and buried her face in the plush fur of his throat, "Please don't go, please, please." It was wrong of her to ask, and somewhere in her pain-stricken heart she knew that. But she needed someone now, needed him. She couldn't get through this hurt on her own.
February 20, 2015, 10:19 PM
i kinda wanna end this but at the same time i dont cuz i think it's the last time I'll have a finn fin thread and that makes me sad ;__;
*sigh*
*sigh*
[size=medium]"If I had a heart you're the one who should break it"[/size]
[size=small]From her mouth, a shower of desperate whimpers came raining down, shooting down the option of leaving. At least until now. While he craned his neck over the silvery female's drooping head, he still made to contact with her body. In the past, no hesitation or previous thoughts would have been given before taking Finley into his embrace to calm her down, but now that dissapointment flashed in the back of his mind and the coldness of rejection touched the scars she had left in his heart he kept himself at a careful distance.
Yet, the small barricade he placed over himself was not inmune to her. While he could isolate his heart from her, it seemed rather impossible to pull away from the soft touch she stretched to give him. Out in the pouring rain, he could not back away from the forlon confort she sought in his arms. In reality, it was not her sad face that kept him there, nor was it the hope of rekindling the flame that she had blown out at their last encounter.
Aside from being inexistent, it was for him, undesirable.
He owed her nothing, yet with his pride momentarily stripped from his chest and his ego caged, he offered her everything.
Her heart was caught in an emotional thunderstorm and even if she, by the laws of karma should be retibuted with his own rejection, she recieved nothing along those lines.
At least for now.
Her pleads, tragic and hopeless, were the ultimate factor that weighed upon his decision.
Staying with her.
Yet, as she buried himself against his body, his muslces stiffened in an unspoken protest that was quickly dismissed by a heavy sigh from his lips.
"Finley, I'm only gonna let you kill me once. " he spoke solemnly, knowing that she would understand -- that she was forced to understand-- that despite her weakness and his solidarity, at the slightest threat from her wretched heart to his, he would leave.
He would not go through the agony again -- not for her.
After their horrid crash and burn he had realized that out of all the shit he had done, all of the mistakes he had listed to his name, the greatest had been loving her. Yet, the one of the greatest pleasures he had had during his whole stay in the Teekon Wilds had been meeting her.
"I'll stay" he declared, his eyes resting on the crown of her head as she continued to press herself against him. "But I won't rescue you just so you can desert me again" he added softly, his voice not holding any trace of resentment. It was not a reprimand or a claim.
He had no right to such just as she had no right to use him.
They could still be together, just not like that.
Never like that.
So with his chin finally falling upon her head softly and his tongue flicking carefully over some stray hairs along the nape of her neck he clutched her as the sky poured its grief over the pair of silver wolves and their hearts, which despite the distance and pain, today stood together.
[/size]
Yet, the small barricade he placed over himself was not inmune to her. While he could isolate his heart from her, it seemed rather impossible to pull away from the soft touch she stretched to give him. Out in the pouring rain, he could not back away from the forlon confort she sought in his arms. In reality, it was not her sad face that kept him there, nor was it the hope of rekindling the flame that she had blown out at their last encounter.
Aside from being inexistent, it was for him, undesirable.
He owed her nothing, yet with his pride momentarily stripped from his chest and his ego caged, he offered her everything.
Her heart was caught in an emotional thunderstorm and even if she, by the laws of karma should be retibuted with his own rejection, she recieved nothing along those lines.
At least for now.
Her pleads, tragic and hopeless, were the ultimate factor that weighed upon his decision.
Staying with her.
Yet, as she buried himself against his body, his muslces stiffened in an unspoken protest that was quickly dismissed by a heavy sigh from his lips.
"Finley, I'm only gonna let you kill me once. " he spoke solemnly, knowing that she would understand -- that she was forced to understand-- that despite her weakness and his solidarity, at the slightest threat from her wretched heart to his, he would leave.
He would not go through the agony again -- not for her.
After their horrid crash and burn he had realized that out of all the shit he had done, all of the mistakes he had listed to his name, the greatest had been loving her. Yet, the one of the greatest pleasures he had had during his whole stay in the Teekon Wilds had been meeting her.
"I'll stay" he declared, his eyes resting on the crown of her head as she continued to press herself against him. "But I won't rescue you just so you can desert me again" he added softly, his voice not holding any trace of resentment. It was not a reprimand or a claim.
He had no right to such just as she had no right to use him.
They could still be together, just not like that.
Never like that.
So with his chin finally falling upon her head softly and his tongue flicking carefully over some stray hairs along the nape of her neck he clutched her as the sky poured its grief over the pair of silver wolves and their hearts, which despite the distance and pain, today stood together.
[/size]
February 22, 2015, 11:01 AM
*pets* I'm sure it won't be the last time, just the last for now <3
It was wrong, so terribly wrong for her to ask of him what she did. After breaking his heart, there she was, begging him to help cradle the shattered pieces of her own heart, which had been destroyed by another man. He should have left her there - pulled himself away and told her that she deserved what she was going through. But he didn't. He wouldn't. And Finley in all of her selfish glory knew this and played it to her advantage then in spite of its cruelty.
While he spoke quietly to her, she continued to sob into his fur. His words stung for they gnawed upon the partially healed wounds she'd made when she'd rended his heart to pieces before. She would never get over the terrible guilt she'd felt at doing that, but clearly even that remorse was not great enough to keep her from using him again. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she hoped that this would prove to him that she wasn't worthy of his affection, that she wasn't worth any of the pain he'd felt over her rejection. But that was neither here nor there at that moment.
Maybe one day she would make amends for all of the terrible things she'd done to him, including this. But it would not be that day. On that day, she would just use him again, and continue wracking up the total of all of the apologies she desperately owed to him, her doppleganger.
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