Blacktail Deer Plateau Poor Unfortunate Soul

@Liri @Corvus @Issun @Ruenna or anyone else! Free for all. She'd be back by now for sure, assuming Thorin brought her back. idk what's happening with that

When she woke up this morning, she found she couldn't remember how she had gotten back. Even worse was she couldn't remember where exactly she was. She knew she was home but where this home was she couldn't recall. So many faces blurred together in her memories, so many names and voices and memories that she couldn't place a timeline to. Sometimes two faces mixed and became the same wolf confusing her even further. Her two homes blended until she couldn't remember a single thing. Was she in japan again? How old was she? Where the hell was she?! She kept fading in and out like this, sometimes waking to hallucinations that truly weren't there other times in a half awake dream state where she truly was back home in japan. It made a mess of her and the next time she woke up she couldn't tell whether she was actually awake or simply in another hallucinated dream.



Minori whined, her tongue lolling out of her mouth cracked and dry. She must have been fading in and out so much that she hadn't been able to drink. She looked around the den she lay in, smelling the reek of infection, blood and herbs. She slowly rose into an upright position, breathing in unfamiliar scents. Her brain was a jumble of memories all out of place and unfortunately for her and everyone else around her the most recent few months were the most mixed up and blurred. For the moment the most recent thing she remembered was being knocked out back in Japan. Her heart leaped and she growled, struggling to push herself up and swaying unsteadily on her legs as her hind left leg was completely useless at the moment unless she wanted to risk tearing open the massive gash in her side and hip. Slowly she hobbled toward the opening of the den and peered out, finding the territory only vaguely familiar. She shook her head and growled with desperate frustration. It was clear she wasn't in Japan and that she had been here a while, but why couldn't she place herself here in her mind? Where was Tadashi? Her mother and father? What had that bastard Higoro done to her?

The thought of that name made her heart heart and she fought it off, closing her eyes and mentally asking questions to focus on the problem at hand and not the fact that she had been betrayed by her first love. What was the problem? She was currently suffering from an assumed head injury causing confusion and hallucinations, it also had apparently made her forget exactly where she was. Who did she remember? Higoro,Mother, Papa, Tadashi..... Tadashi! She whimpered, eyes wild for a moment as she recalled having seen him being taken down as well. Where was he? That little wiggling ball of puppy energy would never survive without family to keep him going. "Tadashi! Tadashi are you here?" the english flying from her mouth caught her off guard and she froze, going completely silent though her shouts had surely been heard throughout the territory.

issun had fallen into a glum, depressive state. every moment he stepped out of the confines of his dark den, he would carry himself a pathetic manner. shoulders slumped, tail drooped, head down. he believed the one night stand would be the answer to his problems but it was only a temporary release. it was not a stranger’s love he wanted, it was minori’s. and that was something he couldn’t have.

he had been drinking from a puddle of water when he heard her all too familiar voice calling through the trees. his heart stopped for a moment. she was back. there was a happiness within him, but it was shrouded by sorrow. he was faced with a dilemma; continue avoiding confrontation, or going to her, knowing full well he’d be hurt. it took some time, but he decided on the latter.

at first he just watched her through the foliage.his breath hitched when he saw her injury. what happened to her? he approached her slowly and tried to hide his anxiety. he feared the reaction she’d have. “what- what happened? why did you...” his voice was barely louder than a whisper.

Her shouts must have been heard as someone came toward her soon after. Slowly she turned to face him and stared for a moment blankly. He had grown so much but..how? Her brow furrowed and she struggled through the hazey confusion in her brain "Tadashi..." she murmured softly. She blinked once and quite suddenly hobbled forward as fast as she could risk, embracing him and whimpering frantically like a mother finding her lost pup. "Tadashi I was so worried, I am so sorry. I'm so foolish falling for that stupid man. Higoro was just..." she stopped herself there. She couldn't talk to her little brother about love and the complications it brings.

She nuzzled him reassuringly "I fell off a cliff. Landed badly. Some nice stranger helped me. Where are we? It seems so familiar but I cant place myself here. My brain is all...confused. memories of people I don't know..." she froze as if that flipped a switch and quickly backed away, realising who she was touching. "Issun... I'm glad you are better" she said her emotional tone changing back to her distant, almost cold one. She avoided his gaze and burned holes into the ground with her own "I am sorry for that..."

tadashi. who the hell was she talking about? before he could ask any questions, she limped over and embraced him. his paws awkwardly flexed in the snow. half of him enjoyed the contact, while the other half wanted to tear away. damnit, why did this woman have to torture him like this?

she went on about falling off a cliff. his heart began to race with worry. what had she been doing? “we’re in the plateau. you’re safe now.”

and just as suddenly as she had hugged him, she pulled away. her reassuring tone had shifted back to a distant one. he looked off to his right, not wanting to make any eye contact with her. his features were emotionless, but he was caving in on the inside. “you need help,” he said blankly.

"You need help" 

Minori knew exactly what he meant but she refused to acknowledge the weakness of her mind at the moment. So instead she deflected it with an amused snort "I know right? Though I don't think even the best medic can save me" she was joking of course. The show was on, she was smirking and eyeing him down like everything was normal but he wouldn't see it. He wouldn't see it because he refused to look at her. She swallowed thickly and looked at her paws trying to figure out what to do. "I'm sorry Issun." she said softly. She flattened her eyes hating the vulnerability apologies always made her feel. "I'm not sorry for my feelings, whatever they are but I am very, very sorry that it is so messy. If... I'd known I wouldn't have let it continue. I'd have let you know and then maybe you wouldn't hate me..." she said the last part in barely a whisper, her heart squeezing painfully. 


That was what it looked like to her. The way he was so cold, couldn't even look at her as if she was too horrible for him to behold. Was what she did really that unforgivable? She felt her lips quiver as she began to wonder if she truly was the bad guy here...what if she had ruined something and it couldn't be fixed? The thought made her scared. "I want to fix this. Please? You're my closest friend, You helped me not close up again. Tell me you don't hate me so much that we can't be friends anymore"

their roles were switched in the moment. now he was on the receiving end of the lighthearted joke. only he wasn’t as receptive as she usually was.

issun kept his focus on the snow below them. he counted each individual crystal that made up the white blanket just to keep his eyes away from her. i can’t look at her. i can’t...

but then her voice softened into that tone. that painful tone he couldn’t bare to hear.

if... i'd known i wouldn't have let it continue. i'd have let you know and then maybe you wouldn't hate me... that made his stomach curl. no, he didn’t hate her, he would never. oh god, this was such a mess. why did things have to be this way? if he hadn’t had fallen in love with her, then none of this would’ve happened. things would be normal, they’d just be friends. things wouldn’t be so complicated. this is all my fault.

issun’s breath hitched in throat. all that left his mouth was, “i don’t hate you.”

He still didn't look at her and her eyes hardened for a moment before the brief flicker of coldness went away again and she studied him, trying to discern any expression she could from his lowered face. She couldn't and it hurt, there was none of the warmth and friendliness, none of the kindness that she had grown so used to. It had just all vanished from him and she was left staring at someone who she finally deemed broken in some way and she couldn't help but blame herself. She had been the one to hurt a friend, to break a heart and at the same time she was slowly opening a hole inside herself. His whispered assurance that he didn't hate her did very little to make her feel better and she simply stared, heart throbbing and eyes going from the soft, hurt look and slowly turning into a more wild and desperate expression. A sharp, keening whimper left her maw and she began to pace "Please...tell me what you want! I know I messed up...nobody can help the way they feel. I know that for certain because if i had a choice, i'd feel nothing at all! I did this because while I feel I have no idea what the emotions are and I suck at recognising them in others.." she poured it out, the word vomit of guilt and sorrow and shame all falling into his ears.

"What can I do Issun? Please tell me how to fix this. I...I don't know how to make you happy, I don't know how to make you stop avoiding me. For fuck's sake you won't even look at me!" she felt herself begin to tremble, heartbeat elevating and head throbbing with pain. She was pushing herself too far, too much stress too soon. She forced herself to stop pacing, to sit down and look at him while taking slow deep breaths.

if he had the power to go back in time, he would. he could’ve kept his feelings to himself or confess before corvus had come. maybe he would’ve kept walking that day. he could’ve left this place with minori, or by himself, or just not have come here at all. he could’ve stayed at bearclaw to prevent them from ever meeting in the first place. he would’ve been happy, either with or without her. but he couldn’t change what has already happened.

these thoughts combined with minori’s waterfall of words overwhelmed him. “stop, just stop! you can’t do anything, there’s nothing to be done!” the rise of his voice made him cringe. he took a deep breath before looking at her. “there’s nothing you can do,” he murmured as he took a seat in the frigid snow. “i don’t know what to do.”

She flinched backwards, ears flattening against her head. Her eyes went wide, his loud shout and his words had struck her more painfully than if he had attacked her physically. She licked her lips and slowly stood up, swallowing back a lump in her throat and instead allowing words to take their place "I'll stop then. I apologise for trying to continue to be your friend when apparently I am so despicable to you that you won't even try to fix our friendship" she muttered these words coldly and turned to leave, beginning to do so before she paused and a low growl left her maw "If I loved someone I would try to fix things no matter what...it would be better for me to have them around as a Friend than to lose them completely. Apparently that is the difference between me and you." she let the words slip from her lips, as she faced away from him. She wouldn't look at him again, he had made it clear that things were done here or at least she saw it that way.

oof. I'm so sorry. I love Issun so much.

he immediately regretted saying anything when she gave him that doe-eyed stare. “i-i didn’t-” but he was cut off by an icy growl of words.

oh god, what had he done? he never meant to hurt her and yet he’s managed to do so multiple times now. stupid. there had to be a way to fix this. he lifted a paw, but it fell back in the snow and whimpered. everything he did, everything he said, it only made things worse. the best thing to do now was to leave her be. issun took one step back, then another, before spinning around to sprint back into the thick of the woods. he didn’t know what to do anymore.