Redhawk Caldera you've got to lose to know how to win.

private for just fammy for now :)

From the moment Finley's eyes snapped open in the hours before dawn broken upon the Wilds, she knew they were coming.  But she also knew quite suddenly with dread in her heart that it was too soon.  For weeks since realizing she was still pregnant, she had gone over and over again in her mind trying to figure out when she could expect them, but never could she really remember the exact number of days, of suns or moons or however she tried to figure it out.  Now with them on the verge of entering the world, she knew without a doubt - too soon.

She had awoken @Elwood with a nervous whine that turned quickly into a snarl as instinct took the wheel.  She drove him away and out of their shared den without a word that hinted at her fear for this moment.  She had no time to be worried or afraid - they were coming and she needed to do all that she could to make sure they made it safely.

That being said, giving birth was just.. it was just awful.  Fin staggered about the den, her breathing heavy and ragged as her stomach pinched and stabbed at her over and over again.  Laying down wasn't an option - each time she tried, another contraction had her up on her feet again, growling and crying and snarling all sorts of foul-mouthed curses at her body and at herself to "quit being such a bitch" and "do this thing".

And thus it was quite the blessing that pups were born into the world perfectly deaf, for the slurred string of profanity that fell from Finley's mouth as her first pup was born was one that not even Elwood was old enough to hear.  Immediately she turned to her firstborn with a tremor in her heart as she saw how tiny she was.  So tiny, and weak.. She was barely even moving her little, pink, stick-like arms as she reached for her mother.  Fin stared in horror for a moment.. then two moments... then three...

It was the cruelest thing she'd ever done, but Fin swept her daughter out of the way as her contractions began again.  Instinct told her that though the little girl was alive for the moment, it would not last.  There was barely any life in the child, and so Finley set her hopes on the pup that was coming along next.  The pain for this one was even worse than the one before, which gave Fin hope as she fought to bring it into the world.  There were tears in her eyes as she finally gave birth to the second.  She gasped when he finally came free and swiftly she dropped onto her side and manuevered herself so that she could look at her second born - a boy, her little @Elwood Jr.  She bit down hard on her lip as she reached for him, nosing his little sides as he wriggled.  He was small, there was no denying that.. but there was strength in his movements and in his tiny voice.

Fin's tears began to fall freely as she cleaned him up and pulled him in close to her stomach.  She didn't need to even look at the other to know that whatever feeble life it had been born with was now gone.  It didn't matter to her anymore.  She had her baby Eljay and he was going to grow up strong and safe and so freakin' loved he might end up exploding in a cloud of rainbows and heart-shaped sparkles at any moment.  Fin laid her head down upon the ground and heaved an exhausted, but so incredibly happy, sigh.