Morningside Cuesta maybe there is someone else in my body, at night

Though he'd sat, the weight hanging over his shoulders had not been alleviated. It took effort nearly insurmountable to turn his head and look back at his dark companion. The green of her eyes shone back at him, earnest and true.

"I feel... guilty," he said, making yet another attempt at honesty. "Steady is family, and to think of leaving him - it just feels like betrayal. If he knew I was thinking about it, he'd be so mad..."

It was something Grayday could understand, of course. Steady had invested time and resources in him, and how was Grayday repaying him? His lifelong services to Easthollow had been bought, and owed them, they owned him.

"But I just get so tired being there," he murmured, thinking of all his restless nights, his long patrols, his endless worry that he wasn't doing enough, that he wasn't enough. "I owe 'um all so much it's just - there ain't enough of me anymore. I feel tired and used up and frustrated, and bein' there... it just never goes away."

It still hadn't, out here in the wilds. But running from it felt good. Spending time with his kids felt right. The simpleness of it soothed him. It was not the perfect life, but he could handle these demons.