Firefly Glen I'm dying to see how this one ends

And she wanted it too.  She could feel every inch of her skin light up beneath her fur, her heart pounding against the cage of her chest.  She takes her tongue and drawls it once across the source of her companion's desire, imagines it is Raven she's pleasing, then freezes.  Just as much as she wanted it, she couldn't do it.  Not here, now, like this.

She pulls back, mouth parting slightly, and then shakes her head.  I can't do this to you — she says, Because I like you, and someone did this to me, when I was like this.  And I regret it.  Which was part of the truth, but she couldn't admit out loud that she was still in love with someone else, in love with someone who could never love her. 

She's embarrassed, ashamed.  She clears her throat and crawls back up if she's allowed to bury her nose in Speedy's neck.  But this is fine, she murmurs, if it's okay.