it should come as no surprise to our adoring readers that in the days following sionnach's birth, she spent a lot of time sleeping. being born fabulous was toilsome work, and the girl took her job of sleeping heavily seriously.
of course, it was hard to catch up on beauty sleep when she had three squirmy siblings, one so fat he ought to have had his own orbit. maybe that was why tibia and fibia were constantly encircling him, trampling poor sionnach underfoot any time she tried to get a meal.
GOD, what does a good-looking girl have to do around here to get secure some tit?!
while titan and his two frothy moons were sleeping, sionnach made her move. as sneaky as an uncoordinated amoeba such as herself could be, the girl wriggled her way from the ever-evolving mass of her siblings and nosed towards home. like an adorable little heat-seeking missile with very bad aim, the girl wormed into the crook of her mother's elbow and clamped down greedily on the loose skin there.
apparently, the sustenance-giver was dry as a hag's bag here -- with mewls of contempt the barkeeper could be so poorly stocked, sionnach nosed around and tumbled to better joints, hopefully with more forthcoming bartenders.
her mother's belly was no better: she was met with nothing but fur (waiter! there's a hair in my motherflipping MILK!). once more howling in protest, sionnach blundered a little further down, putting everything to her mouth as she went (just like that really weird kid in kindergarten that would gum all the toys and then would throw them at you like drool-slimed little torpedos ).
at last, our long-suffering hero was rewarded for all of her trouble: latching to her mother with greedy desparation, sionnach drank her fill like an alcoholic and then fell asleep right at the bar, just like a real day-drinker.
of course, it was hard to catch up on beauty sleep when she had three squirmy siblings, one so fat he ought to have had his own orbit. maybe that was why tibia and fibia were constantly encircling him, trampling poor sionnach underfoot any time she tried to get a meal.
GOD, what does a good-looking girl have to do around here to get secure some tit?!
while titan and his two frothy moons were sleeping, sionnach made her move. as sneaky as an uncoordinated amoeba such as herself could be, the girl wriggled her way from the ever-evolving mass of her siblings and nosed towards home. like an adorable little heat-seeking missile with very bad aim, the girl wormed into the crook of her mother's elbow and clamped down greedily on the loose skin there.
apparently, the sustenance-giver was dry as a hag's bag here -- with mewls of contempt the barkeeper could be so poorly stocked, sionnach nosed around and tumbled to better joints, hopefully with more forthcoming bartenders.
her mother's belly was no better: she was met with nothing but fur (waiter! there's a hair in my motherflipping MILK!). once more howling in protest, sionnach blundered a little further down, putting everything to her mouth as she went (just like that really weird kid in kindergarten that would gum all the toys and then would throw them at you like drool-slimed little torpedos ).
at last, our long-suffering hero was rewarded for all of her trouble: latching to her mother with greedy desparation, sionnach drank her fill like an alcoholic and then fell asleep right at the bar, just like a real day-drinker.
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